POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXIII, Issue 110, 11 May 1932, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

1Y PERCY FLAGB

Personally, our chief objection, to emergency taxes is that they so rarely end when the emergency does. * *. ■: * Eeportcd -to-day that conditions ii Manchuria go. from-bad to -worse. For. the perfect anti-climax it only remains for some banditti to kidnap the League Commission now groping its way through the smoke of hostilities. ■*■ ■ ■ « :-♦ TUBF PHENOMENON. Wo are given: to~unaerstandT.that the hurdler Eusset Moor, a horse of promise over the smaller sticks, is uniquely, situated in so far as his mentor is concerned. ' Here's *the truth of it: "He is_ from Sweet Heather, andi hails from Gi sborrie, where he is trained by' his brother, J. White." Well, welL We1 * suppose'the Bacing Conference is. aware of these extraordinary circumstances, * ♦ • WELL MEANT, BUT— Opinion of a representative "of British < big business as reported from Sydney: —"The depression has not affected New. Zealand as seriously' as it has some other countries, for from outside appearances everyone seems to bo happy and well-dressed." Which-reminds us that Sir John Foster Fraser used to compile most authoritative works oa such countries as Siberia and the Argentine without even leaving his railway carriage except for meals. * * * AND THEN , Adverting to that report of European shipments of munitions for Japan and the anti^Soviet feeling in Manchuria, it ought not to be difficult for Tokio te find an excuse for taking; charge of Vladivostock one of these bright mornings. ( KEEP SMILING. Dear Percy Flage,—Noted last evening in a shop where the plate'glass had at short notice been replaced by » thin board of some kind on which was i*. scribed something like this: NOTICE. No goods will be sold out of this window until, to-morrow. Don't yon think that touch suggests both enterprise and a nice sense of hum. our? SANSCULOTTE. * * * " NOTE FOB BASKET-BALLEBS. Our Education Boards and school committees may be feeling the pinch, but look again at Chicago." A high educational executive in that city has decided that there shall be no whistles blowing in his school basketball games —at least, not Board .of Education whistles. ' Last year the board purchased 1171 whistles costing 186 dollars, not to mention 30,396 safety pins for 42 dollars, 217 pairs of tweezers for lO.dollars, and 375 jars of petroleum jelly, for 26.49 dollars. We shall be glad if local basketball fans will enighten us as to'the use the safety pins, tweezers, and petroleum jelly are put acd .their .New,-, Zealand equivalents —if any."' --~ - - -- _*■ * * ' • " 15 ' x SIMPLICITY AND GREATNESS. We have had evidence "within the last few weeks of the simplicity of the late Aristide Briand. Here is another witness. At his death it was suggested that the words of an Englishman, Sir Austen Chamberlain, be -inscribed _on the tomb of this man of peace: "The greatest Frenchman and tho greatest European." Whether that suggestion has been, or will be, put into effect is not' know 'herej but all Briand asked was "to be buried at my Cocherel, behind the chicken yard, beside my cat,~ Minou, and my dog, Loto." That simple wish must have stirred to whispered laughter the ashes of the Napoleon in tho sarcophagus of porphyry beneath the golden dome of the Ihvalides. ' • ' - * ■-•»-. » BALLAD "OF INQUIRY. Whote for Ottawa! ; That's the next big question. *"* Come along you propheteers With a bright suggestion. Bead the cards, and tell us Who* the favoured are Getting out their visas, ' Set for Ottawa. jWho's for Ottawa? Trip and job are stunning. Dowhie's sure to figure Strongly in tne running. Forbes, too, if ho chooses, Has no need to spar For an opening in the Bunch for Ottawa. Who's for- Ottawa? Burning with desire • l To help little N.Z. . Help our mighty Empire? - Craig and Masters' chances Better are by far ■ Than those of some others Fain for Ottawa. Who's'for Ottawa? . So early in the morning, All such things as bargaining And shrewd axe-grinding scorninst tair James's prospects seem to Bo well-under .Parr, So it looks for Jimmy, j Good-bye,.Ottawal •' * * * LITTLE JOHNNY'S SOS. Dear Mr. * Flage,—My old man (course I calls him Dad to his face) has been reading too much out of the paper lately about "cuts." B&i is a Civil Servant (not very civil to me sometimes when I don't get my sums right), and is always bitterly complaining that there are far too many of these blanky "cuts." WhateveV does ho mean? Apparently the old man does not like, "cuts," In fact his language is often not fit for ant very innocent boy like me to listen to Now, Dad is not the only one in our house who hates "cuts." Littlo Johnny can 't stand them either. But my jolly teacher seems only too fond of them, judging by the blinking way no deals them out to some of us lads at school. Please, Mr. Flage, as you seem to be a great man in the "Evening Post"— whose word "goes" as they say—could you not use your in- • nuence somehow to have a cut made in our school cuts—not a 10 per cent, one —a 100 per cent, issue would do me, I think. Why should we boys not have this cut in our cuts? In great distress I send out this SOS, because you know I daren't even breathe "cuts" to dad. It would not be safe. He gets in such a flaming temper whenever cuts are spoken of that I have the wind badly up at any time about even so much as mentioning "cuts" to the old man. If you can do anything at all to help us desperate school boys, even if only in. memory of the happy'days when' you were a dear innocent little lad, Mr. Flage, will you please do it? Be asport, Sir, and don't tell the old man I wrote to you; He would- give me "you know." Yours in great distress, LITTLE JOHNNY AGED 11,