MORE HOWLERS

Evening Post, Volume CXI, Issue 74, 28 March 1931, Page 20

MORE HOWLERS

For some years the "University Correspondent' 3 (London) has published in January a list of howlers received from its readers. I-lore arc a few from New Year's batch: — "The buttle about the penny post was fought on Rowland Hill. ; "Christopher Columbus didn't discover America, but he discovered something just Hke it. "Mary Queen of Scots. sewed well. History says she was fond of darning. "Bannock Burn so called because Alfred burned the cakes there. "Joan of Are, a brave woman, the wife of Noah. . j "A sextant is a church caretaker, "Iv cases of poisoning a cosmetic is used. "A matrix is a component part of a bedstead. • . "The best way to preserve the teeth is to put them in water overnight. "Calico and linen arc dangerous to wear, because when the body gets heated it soaks into the cloth. "Wireless valves , work by eccentricity. "White is a colour that stands for joy, women arc married in white, but men never arc. "An acute angle is less than a right angle and greater than two right angles. "Weather is what we have every day, climate is what we should have if wo wero at aca level. "An'isosceles triangle has three of its sides equal, and. any one of them is parallel to the third. "A toadstool is a thing that looks like a mushroom, then if you eat it you die and you know it is not a mushroom. "M.A. is what a lady becomes when she gets married. "A buttress in a lady butler. "Levi sat at the receipt of costumes. "Curtail—Uie end of a mongrel. "A. Budget is an Irish Female Servant. "Contralto is a low kind of music sung only by women. | "A bankrupt is a man who broke the b.-ink through gambling and taxes," (