POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXI, Issue 71, 25 March 1931, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

EY PERCY FLAG!

We are making this a top paragraph" in the hope that it will catch the roving eyo of some of our legislators. "The most aggravated case of convict labour," wrote the Chinese traveller Sing 'long, "is apparently to be found in the Congress of the United States. It is inconceivable that men should go on. talking for weeks and months, unless they were sentenced to do so." It takes the cold philosophic Oriental eye to get the right perspective oa such things. « * • . It has just occurred to us that if we had to be shot at dawn we should protest strongly against Mr. W. M'lver being included in the firing party. "Stonewall" headings:— TACTICS TO CONTINUE. WILL EXHAUST RULES OF HOUSE. And the country's patience, too. « * • Those inextricably mixed metaphors of Robert Simplioitas Semple, M.P., bespeak an exuberant fancy which must bo a terrible responsibility to a politician. « * * Relative f.o those so far thwarted appointments to the New South Wail* Upper House. We really think it is a shame That little game of Lang's should be Out-gamed by yet another Game Game to assert authority. ■X- * * "Flag-ito" (Oriental Bay), one of the ten per cent-ed, sings out of his heart thus — ' I submit herewith this flower of my; brain. If you don't accept it, I'll have you know I've had my poetry rejected by better men than. you. (With apologies to Omar.) "Awake! Awake! For into this calm night George Forbes has dealt a blow whicK leaves us in a plight, And lo! my wage (which scarcely meeti our rent) Is paid to me each week 'less ten per cent.' And so, reflective, as I homeward tramp I ponder on the extra postage stamp, And scan my 'Post' with gloomy brow, To see what Georgie-Porgie's planning now." Some apology to the late Omar was called for; nevertheless, dear client, your verse finds favour in our eyes becauso of the depth of feeling it reveals. » « * OUR SEVEN WONDERS. Two strongly contrasting editions o? the seven wonders of this extraordinary city. Referring to that of "«T Assax" —we had not realised there were so many kookaburras around and about us. Dear Percy,—Somehow or other we'rs all included in the Seven Wonders of Wellington: — (1) The jackasses at the Zoo. (2) The jackasses who look at them, (3) The jackasses in Parliament. (4) The jackasses who listen to them* (5) The jackasses who "work the weather." (6) The jackasses who pay heed to them. (7) All the other jackasses in the town; including your old braying jackass^ i J. ASSAX, "J.H.'s" hand-picked selection. Hero are my Seven Wonders of Wellington. They are all very much imaginary, however: — (1) A summer's day. (2) A statesman among politicians. (3) An endurance swimmer who beat her own record by more than half aa hour. . (4) A Reform M.P. voting against, the "cut." (5) A pilot who crashed througn faulty handling. (6) An active member of tie Good Morning Club. (7) A Budget surplus. # * • We were prompted to ttese jangling reflections by reading of the only; daughter of a noble English house Tvhoj deeming the world well lost for love^ eloped with her father's chauffeur. She was a girl of high, degree, Cultured and svelte and twenty-three. Her doting parents dreamed of her As consort to a Minister, When she- could stage suave morning teas For the elite at Bellamys; Or, failing that, a rich man's son With, lots, and lots, and lots of monj Or failing that, an All Black who Was "possible" and well-to-do; Or failing that, the soddon heir Of any well-known millionaire; Or, last resource, the lass might wed A squatter king with doddery head. This being an authentic tale, The stark truth must, of course, prtr vail. She ended up one summer night In sudden and clandestine flight With a broadsider, dark and tall, Who hadn't anything at all! He was a likely-looking lad, Great dreams of whom his parents aa# When ho was, oh, extremely young. Above'his sleeping form they hung, Commenting on his breadth of brow, ' Explaining to each other how _ | That indicated brain power which Should bring him fame or make hmi rich. And as his face was fair to see AVho knew what ho might come to bel; They dreamed of him, branch of their

stem, '. Perhaps a nation-loved P.M. ' At least, an orator of fame i Whom, awe-struck thousands would ac« I claim; Or a great artist who, with pen Or paint, would stir the hearts of nieni Alas! To-day, that sprig of fate, Now firmly set in man's estate, j Keeps fairly full the family dish By selling sections on commish.

Hollywood "stars" might bo envious of the adulation given the Oberammagau passion-play actors, but they' would sniff at their salaries. During the long winter months Alois Lang— who played the part of Christ—and his colleagues studied their roles, and eighty times they rehearsed, in snow, in rain, or in ■ blazing sunshine, each timo having to brave the elements for eight hours. Recently the players received their share of the profits. Lang was content with £350, and a similar amount went to the man who "did" Caiaphas. The 22-year-old Annie Kutz, the Mary of the play, received £170, ;i sum that goes as a wedding dowry to Hansi Preisiuger, the Mary Magdalen, who was married shortly after the last performance. Best paid oC all was the director, (r. Lang, whose share was £425. ' Next came'tho musical director, Herr Dionicr, , with £400. Tim payment o£ the radt- j viduiil members of the "crowd" ranged. : from £65 to £130, and every child par- I tieipant. was given £I<\ - j