CHARGE OF THE LIMB BRIGADE.

Evening Post, Volume XCIII, Issue 89, 14 April 1917, Page 16

CHARGE OF THE LIMB BRIGADE.

Half aii inch, half an inch Half an inch shorter, Whether the skirts are for Mother or daughter. Briefer thp drosses grow, Fuller the ripples now, While whisking glimpses show, More than they oughter. ' ■ • Forward the dress.parade, Is there a man dismayed? No—from, the sight displayed None could be sundered. Theirs not to make remark, Clergyman, clubman, clerk, Gaping from noon till dark At the Four Hundred. Short skirts to right of them— . Shorter to left of them, , Shortest in front of them, Flaunted and flirted — In hose of stripe and plaid, Hued most exceeding glad, Sporting in spats run mad, Came the short-skirted. Flashed all their ankles there, : Flashed as they turned in air— What will not women dare? (Though the exhibits .'show Some of them, blundered) All sorts and shapes of pegs, Broomsticks, piano \egs; ... ■ Here and there fairy shapes; Just built to walk on eggs,- . Came by the hundred — When can their glory fade ? ,Oh, the wild show they made, .- ; All the world wondered, Grande dame and demoiselle, • Four hundred—H'm—oh, well, Any old hundred. j _ — Ellis Burnett. Montgomery Advertiser. The Suitor—What will your father settle on the man who marries you? The Girl—All the'rest of the family, I suppose. . Son—"What land of ships sail on the sea of matrimony?" Pa—"Hardships, my boy!" "You ask my hand' in marriage. Aren't you rather ambitious?" "Yes; but I always did strive for big things!" "Casey is me pertickler frind, Oi'd*have ye know. 4' "G'wan! If he was pertickler, ho wouldn't be yer frind." "

"No," said the philosophical hermit, "I have never felt the need of,a wife. You. see, I have a talking-machine and an ungovernable temper."

Griggs—"This world would be a plea^ santer-place if there were not so many fools in it." Grawson—"Yes; but it would be more difficult \@ make a living."

Ethel—How many times do you make a young man propose before you say. yes? Muriel —If yqu have to make him propose you'd better say yes the first time.

"Dearest, I ordered to be sent home today a; most beautiful hat for only three pounds. It's a perfect' love !" "My darling, your love will.be returned !"■

"Dad, what is a gramophone?" "A gramophone, my boy, is ah instrument which when heard makes a man feel sorry, ho ever said "anything unkind about a piano!" !

Wife —"Before we were married you used to send me flowers every week." Husband —"Yes* my dear, but this week I'm sending round a ton of coal and somo beef I". ■•■•.■■■.-■■

Cynic—-"So your aiahipwas wrecked in the blizzard. I thought you considered it perfect." "The ship was perfect," re: plied the inventor, stiffly. "The air was .at fault!" . ' ■ . .

"You're full again and I'll send you up," said the balloon owner who used to bo a police 1 court justice.. V

Mother-^How did you get that black eye, Tommy? Tommy (disgustedly)-!-By waitin' to count ten when I was angry, like you told me to; that's how I got it.