A HAPPY SOLUTION.

Evening Post, Volume LXXXI, Issue 112, 13 May 1911, Page 10

A HAPPY SOLUTION.

» "Why should l I," exclaimed Mr. Abscom, "just because a number of other people have determined to do things in a* particular manner, be bound down to rules? I -am a free man. I shall hereafter do.as I please." Unfortunately for Mr. Abscom, ho was a married man — which possibl)' made it all the harder for 'iim to carry out his individual programme — but life ' determined to keep it. "Hereafter," he announced to his wifo, on the first morning, "I shall eat my meals as I please, and they shall consist of just what I please ; moreover, I shall not do my resting as most people do; but I shall evolve a schedule of my own — one that shall serve my needs best." Mrs. Abscom, being a more or leas resigned woman, permitted him to carry out his idea without too much criticism, albeit inwardly she resented any change. That night Mr. Abscom read until three o'clock in the morning. He then ate an apple and took a piece of bread and butter. He slept until 10 o'clock. On his way to the office he took a cup of coffee. He was the only man sitting at the restaurant counter when this happened. "I will arrive at^the oilice late every morning — or what you are pleased to consider late," ho said to his head clerk, "and I will stay late." He worked on steadily until he was hungry, which was about three. Then he went out aud got a square meal — although he had to wait to nave it coked — and returning, worked until nine. All the clerks went home at the usual time. The next morning Mr. Abscom announced to his wifo that thenceforth he would eat no meals sitting down at a table. "It's a ridiculous custom," he asserted. "The animals don't do it. Imagine a lot of dogs gathering solemnly every day at noon around a long board. I shall forage for my own food, eating when I please. I shall snatch a bite every now and then, so make no account of me. I need no one to wait upon me." "After he had been at this a week, trying experiments with himself, Mr. Abscom awoke one morning to a new sensation. He discovered that he was looking at everything in a totally different manner from what he had done before. One of his habits, for example, had been to read a morning paper. "Why should I- read a paper at all?" he suddenly asked hini*)&lf. "Why should I interest myself in news? What is news anyway? It is only a record of the same old things that happen over and over again. It is true that the setting variea slightly. Murders, for example, are not all committed in the same manner, but they are all due to a few motives. So with politics; onco learn the motive behind them, and the superficial details are unimportant." Mr. Abscom^ therefore, cut out tho papers, and interested himself in literature. This led to strange results. Instead of reading a book that was written by a standard author, or » classic — such, for example, a-5 Shakespeare's "Hamlet" — he selected a book that ho found on a second-hand book Stand, .and which nobody had ever hoa/d of before. , Mr. Abscom regd it through and liked it so much that' he read, it through again. This was, of course,' something

unheard of, and Mr. Abtcom thoroughly enjoyed the (sensation. Then he read it a third time. At the end of a montli, it began to leak out that there was something queer about Mr. Absconu The neighbours began to talk about him, and his wife referred to the matter rather iy"Everybody thinks you've gone crazy," she expostulated mildly. "What of it?" said Abscom. "For the first time in my life I am leading, a perfectly natural existence. I am actually thinking for myself, and working out a plan ol lite which pleases me best. The majority of people havo determined upon doing a certain thing in a certain manner, because on the whole this is perhaps the best way for tho majority. I don't dispute that. lam not quarreling with the majority, which can do as it pleases. But why shouldn't I think for myself and create an individual standard- of living which is better for mo individually than it is for a lot of people?" The next day Mr. Abscom went without any collar and cr"a.vat. In place of his ordinary sac suit, he had a garment made to order that, after considerable thought, was designed to give him the most comfort. It was modelled somewhat after the Roman toga. He was followed to the railroad station by a crowd. In fact, the papers had got hold of his extraordinary story, and ho was rapidly becoming a notorious figure; but as he did not read them, this did not disturb him. One day, however, hi." chief clerk approached him with a solemn aspect, and said that his line of credit had been refused by every one of the houses they were formerly doing business with. "This means ruin," he eaid. "I know it," said Abscom. "Naturally they distrust a man who has suddenly thrown custom to the winds. Well, I am tired of this business anyway. I have enough money to live on. I shall turn the place over to you." Then he went home, drew up a statement of his affairs, discovered now much money he had, and divided it into four parts, one for himself, one for his wife, and one for each of his two children. The next day, accompanied by his attorney, ho called them all into the room •with him, and formally gave them each a fourth of his property. "I shall want you eaph to do exactly as you please," he said, "and for this purpose I am dividing equally among you my whole fortune." "But we are incapable of managing it," sobbed Mrs. Abscom, "we have always done as others do, and we certainly cannot make fools of ourselves as you are doing. Why, I could get you committed to an asylum just as easy as not," she added. "Everybody thinks you are crazy." ■Then she threw herself into his arms. "Don't you see," she said, "that you are making us all miserable, and have you a right to do this? Consider! You have obligations to others." "I know it," replied Mr. Abscom firmly, "and I am fulfilling them, am I not? lam giving you all that I possess, except one-fourth, to do with as you please. What^ then, is the trouble? No one can accuse me of being immoral. You admit, do you not, that my_ method of eating and sleeping is infinitely superior, to the one you have. lam not dependent upon any servaats. Solving that problem alone is worth almost everything. 1 ' do not overburden my stomach ; I waste but little time on the more physical things, and thus relegate them where they belong. Is that not 60^" f "Yes, I suppose It is." "You admit that my new clothing is

tho only sensible garment. It is graceful, adjusted with the greatest possible ease, supremely comfortable, and very economical." "Yes." "Aside from the inconvenience you have been subjected to upon my account, you must admit also, I think, that since I made this change I have been more interesting '! Instead of absorbing a lot of manufactured opinions and ideas from other sources. I look at the world fearlessly from my own standpoint— l face things, and thus I am acquiring a body of original information. In short, is it not true that I have an individuality that I never had before?" ♦ "Oh, yes, that is true." "We love you more than ever," piped up both children, who, not being old enough to understand everything, were tremendously interested in what their father did. "Well, then," said Mr. Abscom, "what in the trouble? Whv 2 it is pimply thus : The community will not permit any one of its members to depart from the standard that it has set for them as a whole, unless by so doing that member gives in return something that will compensate tho community, as a whole, for the cost of his being different. For example, if I should produce a work of genius, the community would immediately forgive me for what it is ploascd to consider my eccentricities." "But as you haven't produced any work of genius," sobbed Mrs. Abscom, 'and 'have only succeeded in convincing everybody that you are a fool, what are^ you going to do about it?" "I shall keep right pn, because I really couldn't do anything eLse. And this leads me to an original reflection." |]What is that?" "If I were another man — a drunkard, or a gambler, or possessed of one of" those mean and savage natures which delighted in grinding- his wife <Wn — depriving her of money and browbeating her in every possible way— if, in fact, I were any one of several kinds of the modern brute husband— you would cling' to me like^a porous plaster. But just because I am thinking and acting for my self and endeavouring to subvert the monotony of life by making myself interesting to you all and giving you your independence, I make this prediction": You will all leave me. The pressure of conventionality will be too great. You can stand being cruelly treated so long as it is customary. But you cannot stand being rationally treated, because it is unheard of." Mrs. Abscom, motioning the children, came over and they all threw their arms about him. "No," she exclaimed. "We shall do nothing of the sort, no matter how peculiar you may become. Instead of this, we will. give up our residence in •New York, and go and live on the outskirts of Bostom, where your shocking conduct will not be noticed." "Which happy solution of what I thought -was an unsqlvable problem convinces me," replied Abscom joyfully, "that you are quite worthy to be the partner of such a perfectly unconventional person as myself."— T.L.M., in New York Life. A SYDNEY MOTHER'S EXPERIENCE. "I really cannot lot tho opportunity pace without telling about the good done my little son by using Chamborlain'3 Cough Remedy," says Mrs. H. Silks, of 29 Dowling-fitreet, Camperdown, Sydney. "He had a very severe cold. The doctor gave me medicine for, him, but it ■ did him no good. I was recommended to try Chamberlain's Cough Remedy, and before a small bottle was half finished ho was as well ac ever." — Advt.