THE ADVENTURE OF DYING

Ellesmere Guardian, Volume XLVI, Issue 3230, 22 June 1928, Page 7

THE ADVENTURE OF DYING

THE INEVITABLE JOURNEY

THE BORDER OE INFINITY,

The following is a true story of an operation for cancer. The Avriter, Mr IW..C. Edgar, of 1208, Second Avenue South, Minneapolis, is a avoll knoAvn journalist. The incident described took place five years ago. Since then he has had no return of the symptoms and may be considered definitely cured.

I suppose the most thrilling adventure an individual ever has in life is the passage from this Avoiid to the next. Few, however, having gone far enough on this inevitable journey to reach the border of infinity, return to tell of their sensations as they apparently crossed the line into the country beyond human ken.

This perhaps is natural, considering the mystery involved in the translation from the known to the unknown, but I am now sure that to" live in constant fear of death, as if it Avere some cruel monster, forever hovering over and threatening to savoop down, more or less suddenly, and carry one off from all that is dear and familiar, to unknoAvn terrors, is not only to suffer in imagination a thousand deaths, but, if my experience is of any value, it is Avholly unnecessary.

The Avriter proceeds to narrate the medical examination* and the reasons Avhich led to his being placed on the operating table.

"Except for the local anaesthetic, applied to the affected region, which rendered it insensible to pain, I was giA'en nothing to make me oblivious. I remained to the end fully conscious of all the proceedings. I saw the master surgeon in his uniform bending over my prostrate body, the pretty little nurse standing by my head, ready to give me an injection of ether should I feel the 'need of it, and the other attendants and assistants. My own doctor stood beside me, watching me, and holding my wrist in his hand, observant of the fluctuations of my pulse. From time to time I exchanged words with those near by.

"Finally, I brought to the occasion the insiincts of a trained journalist. I thought to myself: 'This is an interesting event in which I happen to take the leading part. I am about to enter [the famous Valley of the Shadow of Death, and few are they who have returned therefrom to tell the tale. Perhaps, even probably, I shall never emerge. Fortunately my wits are all Avith me. I am hot approaching the ultimate finish like a dull, senseless clod, drugged into unconsciousness. I am able to see and hear and reason ! clearly, and will be to the end. This is an unusual and very great privilege, and it behoves me, as a member of my craft, to make careful and accurate notes of tins adventure as it proceeds,^ 'and to be very clear concerning it in all its details.'

'' There was a certain comfort, almost exaltation, in this impersonal rea-. soning, which I maintained to th^c fin ish. Meantime the surgeon proceeded. After a period that seemed long, but was probably brief, I began to be 'conscious of a dual personality housed Avithiu one frame; the external body lying prone and helpless on'the table j beneath the surgeon's skilful knife, land an essence of life Avithin me which rose and fell in alternate waves of vitality, as it .were, like the rise and fall of a rapidly-moving thermometer.

"Simultaneously Avith this sensation of an ebbing and returning life essence, Avhich seemed to recede further, or fall deeper, and to return less abun dantly, and less surely Avith each recurrent movement, I became absolutely convinced., beyond the faintest'shadow of a doubt, that this life element within me was indestructible; heretofore existent, it would survive and hence forth would surely be imperishable.

"This, then, I thought, is the spiritual body, destined to survive and triumph over' so-called death. It Avas true; life undoubtedly persisted beyond that of the natural body. In a few minutes, perhaps, I would actually be living in it. The thought made me at once independent of all human environment.

"Thenceforth I became as a purely disinterested observer of events. In the outcome I Avas not especially interested—it -seemed a comparatiA'ely trifling matter. If I had any definite bias, so far as I myself was concerned, it Avas in favour of going on to the unknoAvn rather than returning to the natural life and its vexations.

"As against this course I reflected that there Avere others who had a right to be considered. There were my own family and friends, who naturally wished me to continue to live, and there Aye re tho surgeon, my doctor, and all the others concerned in this attempt to keep me on earth, and who were making such a magnificent fight to saA^e my natural life; these challenged my sense of loyalty.

It was clearly my duty to play tho game from their standpoint of what

constituted victory, and to do my utmost to co-operate Avith them, even if it were easier and far more agreeable to me to slip gently into the other world on the next inevitable, recession of the life essence. As vitality waned once more I put forth, reluctantly,- but earnestly, my utmost poAvers of resistance, and so flickered back in time to renew another and deeper plunge.

"Glancing at the face of my physician, as I again descended towards the border line of the natural lifcj I observed that it Avas very white and drawn. Afterwards he told me that my heart had been- alarmingly affected and that several times he thought I was about to go. This must have been at the uttermost ebbs of the vital urge, Avhen I asked myself if the end had actually arrived and if I Avas really off on the great adventure.

"Repeatedly, and with lessened in-terA-als, th _ process of ebbing i and flowing continued. Then came one moment which seemed the supreme and final throb of expiring life, but again it came sluggishly flowing back. During all this time there Avas no pain Avhatevcr. Increasingly I was convinced that the vital part of me Avas not going to die, whatever happened, but merely to change the form and texture !of its continuing existence. The absolute certainty that death, so-called, was not the end, but merely a new begin|ning, Avas pre-eminent in my mind. Of this I had not the faintest doubt, although I did riot conjecture what this new life was like, nor had I any desire to speculate as to this. It was enough to feel assured, as I did, that there was nothing to fear in it.

'' Had I lived a blameless mortal life, which I had not, I could not have felt less remorse for the past. There was no regret of lost opportunities, no mental reviewing of life's history, no concern whatever, either for reward or punishment to come in the Country beyond—only a strong and abidingstrength of calmness and peace.

'' Most reassuring of all was the feel-

ing that/ while quite h.lpless myself, I was in the hands of an infinitelybenign Power which cared for me and Avould protect me from all that was ill; a Power whose attributes were goodness and mercy. Into this complete assurance the faith I had been taught seemed perfectly to fit, without prejudice to other faiths than mine.. The Avhole scheme of life on this earth, death and the certain life to come seemed' to have meaning and purpose, to be harmonious, natural, and, above all, bencficient.

"Finally the long operation was over and I still survived. .. I was lifted from the table and carried back to my room, to begin the long and painful struggle back to health, during which, even in the moments hardest to bear, there came no fear of death, for my experience had robbed it of all its

terrors.''