A BOOK OF TALL STORIES.

Dunstan Times, Issue 3464, 7 April 1930, Page 2

A BOOK OF TALL STORIES.

“1 have travelled in sixty-four countries, including Hell (Norway),” says the author of a collection of newspaper paragraphs now published m book form under the dispassionate title “believe It or Not!” But despite its seeming indifference, the title is at Hie same time a challenge to our scep-ticism—-a scepticism which the author warmly welcomes as the noblest tribute to his skill. “Ordinarily when one is called a liar—well, to say the least, one feels hurt. But it is different with me; I fed flattered. That short and ugly word is like music to my ears.” And -so it becomes almost our duty to lie staggered by this Odyssey ol Oddities, this “book ol Wonders, Miracles. Freaks, Monstrosities, and almost Impossibilities.” The publistiers describe it crisply as “a combined Cook’s Tour, Circus, and Encyclopaedia all in one.” It is, indeed—“and then some,” as they say in the country where these paragraphs first reduced their ready readers to a state ol unbelieving .wonderment. Perhaps it .is less of a Circus than a Museum —a museum of Unnatural History, where Exhibit A is a chicken ol New Bedford (Alass.) which laid a perfectly square egg; Exldbt B, an aged youth, who reached maturty and grew whiskers at the age of four, and (lied of old age before he was seven; mid Exhibit C. a Chinaman, born with double pupils in each eye, who—presumably through his powers ol Circumspection—became the Governor or a province. l.low Desdemona would have enjoyed herself in tins galieiy. Desdemoiia whose greedy ear devourau Ot hello’s discourse of the “Anthropophagi and men whose heads Do grow beneath their shoulders. And"though we may not lie quite so seriously inclined as Desdemoiia, M't we pass on from one specimen to another with that strange interest wind! the abnormal always has for the noi • mal. Yet, maybe, noi strange, tor is not idiosyncrasy in another the subt !e-t flattery of our own impeccable pro- ' In all his travels the oddest thing the author saw was Alan. “Flie land placed a funny-looking fellow on the earth without telling him what it was all about. . . .' This funny-looking chap has beep running about trying to find out ever'since.” And m Ins struggle to solve the riddle, man has done""strango things, mainly for re-ligion-’s sake. There is the naked fakir who for 15 years sought after Ids gods by glaring all day at the the blazing sun, until, at last the fiery ravs burned out Ids eyes. A Hindu ascetic walked for three miles with 50 spears embedded in ids flesh. Another Hindu held his arms above lus head for 20 years, A Sadhu used to hand head downwards for three hours at, a time. Other forms of voluntary torture in the name of religion are those practised by the “Ever-standing men,” wi. have not sat dow, ■ r ten years, the “Nail-men.” whose nails are allowed to grow until they pierce the palms, and the “Tree-men,” who bang upside down in trees like monkeys.

But the author also gives us stories of men who do queer things from other motives —gain, notoriety, or sheer love- of the bizarre. Here is one ot an Indian juggler who lifted a basket ol snakes with his eyeballs! Attached to the basket was a rope to the ends of which wet© fixed two little hollow leaden cups. These cups the man pjaced over his eyeballs in such a manner that a- vacuum was created; then he shut his eyelids firmly over the outside of the cups, and lifted the heavy basket by the grip of Ids eyelids and the suction on his eyeballs alone! Pleasanter reading is the story ol Henry Lewis, who played billiards with Ids no.se> and made a break of 4G. A similar kind of skill was shown by an Austrian musician who played tunes on the piano with Ids tongue. But flies© are as naught compared with the feat of au armless golfer of Buffalo who, gripping ids clubs between neck and cldu, wont round in 98, a score which I, who have the usual number of ann>, find it hard to better. I think he must have been a neck-rom-ancer.

Occasionally the author brings back to my mind two cross-talk comedians of prcAVar days, one of whom, Alick, used to interrupt his own tale at the very climax by interjecting, “ and believe me, or believe me not”;, to which Alack invariably replied, “1 believe you (dramatic pause) nut.” -May the reader enjoy the following story as much as 1 did. Its authenticity, the author assures us, is guaranteed. “Seven years ago a farmer in lowa hung Ids vest on a fence lu the barnyard. A calf chewed up a pocket in the garment in which was a gold watch. Last week the animal, a staid old milk cow, was butchered for beef, and the timepiece was found in such a position between the lungs of the cow that respiration kept tho stem winded wound up. and the watch had lost but four minutes in the seven years. interspersed like oases among these mmiy marvels arc a number of statements ol fact which arrest and interest

■' I and hcrgh was tin* (i7lh man to make a non-stop flight mcr t lu* Atlantic Ocean." Surely not, we mnrnmr. <|• iite forgetting that in achlitum Id Alcock and Blown, the (crew nl dll and the Herman Airship (crew ol do) Intve t<< he taken into account. ".Napoleon, like .Moses, crossed the (fed Sea on dry land," Napoleon himself says so in his Memorial, and such a crossing j,. possible through a combination ol' wind, tide, and sand-hars. i "Nero did not liddle while Homo burned." He was fifty miles away at the time, and in any ease the fiddle Inn! mil ■ ieim invented ! •'There is no mirk in cork legs." r l no name comes from Dr Cork, who in- \ i'ii Icd I hem. I 11111 sI i Diitcnl myseli wit hj (plot nig only two or lliree more of the tit-hifs. There surely never was a luckier man Ilian the Canadian oflieer who fell out of a 'plane when it made a sudden ver- I i jea I bivr. and. alter d roppi lip- -ever i i j hundred leet. alighted on the lad ol j Ihe machine and so < aim; salelv to j earth. * ' ; The shortest 1 poem" in Ihe uol id I- ■■ | .ines written on the an I hpi i I ies el IMicrooes'' • "Adam I lad 'em." Bni a not her runs it close : “11 i red. Tired r Fired. \ jinal (pmtalion 1 1 cm t his prodigious hook: "Mine. Marie Oliivier. ol 11ondschoote. Flanders, who committed bigamy, was sentenced to wear two j pairs ol pants around her neck lor - life." Was punishment ever more ade- | qiiateh made to lit the crime:' The anl her warns us I hat he lia - | ample mail rial lor several more hook-. ■ for in\ part. I should like a little while to recover my breath.