Untitled

Daily Telegraph (Napier), Issue 2981, 14 January 1881, Page 4

Seene —Inverness photographer's studio. Artist (facetiously to Highlander) : "Oh yes, can take you anyway you like—upside, downside, inside, or outside, full size ox half size, sitting or standing—any way, any way, sir, all for one shilling ! " Highlander (artfully) : Maybe you koona de hex any way boo. " Artist (with gusto) : " Yes, any way, if not, I'll take you for nothing. " Adjusts camera and puts Highlander in position. " Now, please, look here." Highlander looks there, at the same time with a grin marches up and down. Artist: " But you musn't walk about that way. You must —" Highlander : " No-tv-tall I want her to be took walking. "

m m men were hewing in a colliery not far from Dunfermline, a few days ago, when a stone fell from the roof, knocking the cap from the bald heid ancl grazing the nose of one of them, and putting out. both their lamps. " Oh, man, Jock, " said the injured man, as he felt the blood trickling clown his nose, " I believe that stane's knocked the skin aff ma nose. " Jock reached out his hands in the dar-ness, got his fingers on the hairless scalp of his mate, which lie mistook for his face. "Guineas gracious!" exclaimed the dumfounded miner, feeling all over the bald crown of his companion, '' yer nose is clean aff yer face, an' I'm dashed but yer mooth an 'een are gane as weel! " Toddlekins is a very small man indeed, but he said be never minded it at all, until his three boys grew up to be tall, strapping young fellows, and his wife began to cut down their old clothes and cut them over to fit him. And then he said he did get mad.