NOTES ON LOVE.

Daily Southern Cross, Volume XXVII, Issue 4409, 2 October 1871, Page 3

NOTES ON LOVE.

FROM A LADY S SCRAP-BOOK. I verily believe that, as a general rule, young men fall in lore and wish to marry before they dare marry. The.keenest passion of love is possible to a mere youth whose notions of the world and the requirements of life are so untrue as to be pathetically ludicrous. JJut what .does he oare for, these things when the groat revelation comes up oil him? He steps into a new world, and the light of it blinds his eyes. There ia for him nothing ia. the universe but a passionflower of a face which turns towards him whichever way he turns, and dazzles him with its awful lustre. He has severed the old bonds. The self-regarding audacity and shame-facedness •( youth are gone from him. He assumes the " certain step of man ;" and has vague longings for a suit of armour, a horse, a sword, and an enemy. The exquisite truth of Dicken«'s description of David Copperfield's courtship of Dora is precisely one of those passages which silence us when we begin to complain of the great novelist's wilful exaggerations and burlesques. The love of this period ia called " calf-love." It is generally laughed at. One does not at first see why one of the most powerful causes of human pain should be regarded as a joke ; but time dulls the sorrow of bygone years, and shows us its dramatic and humorous aide. As society stands, a m*n is expected to offer his wife something lik« the position which she hitherto, tinder her parents' roof, enjoyed. At any rate, it may be assumed that a husband is expected to give his wife assurances of being able to keep her on this side of starvation. Such considerations are banished from the glowing atmoßphere of first love. Now, inasmuch as there are few men who do not fall in lore before they can marry, thence arises a large proportioa of these universal love miseries. Love springs up in defiance of social and other restrictions of all kinds ; and the restrictions, as a rule, conquer. A great many circumstances must accurately lit aud unite before a " match " can be naade. Love ignores these circumstances. He scouts the prelimiaary necessity of obtaining an introduction— a simple, but often remarkably difficult matter. He takes no heed of social position, of proud friends, of pecuniary difficulties, of professional requirements, of physiological stumbling-blocks (such as the presence of hereditary insanity or consumption in a family) and a dozen similar matters. A lady-friend of mine said to me some little time ago, " Why are men led by a supreme instinct to associate love and misery ? Why are plays that tell of love's mishaps, and wrongs and sufferings, moro instantly popular than any other? Why does a love-story which has a sad ending linger in oue's mind longer than one that ends with the customary perfume of orangeblossom and the musical pop of champagne ? Yet it 13 a notorious fact that love is not the ruling passion of men and women throughout their lives. During a certain time it is so ; but so, at certain times, are all passions ruling. The predominant passion of mankind, however it may be disguised, is individual advancement, whetliGr the man aims at money, or fame, or power." And now, upon this subject of early love, I will quote a passage from a clever letter by a somewhat eccentric gentleman - friend of of mine :—": — " One of the queeiest and funniest things !or a man to think of in after - life is boy-love. No sooner does a boy acquire a tolerable stature then he begins to imagine himself a man, and to npe manish ways. He casts sido-glanoes at the tall girls hoinay meet becomes a regular attendant at church carries a cane, hold his head erect, and struts a little in his walk. Presently, aud very soon, he falls in love ; yes, falls is the proper word, because it best indicates his happy, delirious self-abasement. He lives now in fairy region somewhat collateral to the worLl, and yet blended somehow with it. He perfumes his hair with fragrant oils, scatters essences over his handkerchief, and desperately shaves and anoints for a beard. He quotes poetry in which 'love' and 'dove,' ' heart ' and ' dart,' peculiarly predominate. He feeds upon the looks of his beloved ; is raised to the seventh heaven if she speaks a pleasant word ; is betrayed into the most astonishing enstacies by a smile ; and is plunged into the gloomiest regions of misanthropy by a frown. Ho believes himself the most devoted lover in the world. There was never such another. There never will be. He is the one great idolator ! Wealth I Ho despises the grovelling thought. Poverty, with the adorable beloved, he raptureusly apostrophizes as the first of all earthly blessings ; and ' love in a cottage, with water and crust,' is his beaui deal Paradise of dainty delights."

Not Jong since, in a sermon, Henry Ward Beccher alluded to amusements in homes, taking a liberal view of the subject. Said he : " Some person3, when they join a church, think that they must put all the glee, and inirth, and music out of their lives. Don't let it die. My second mother — for I remember no other — was my idea of womanly gentleness, propriety, and elegance. She was not, however very demonstrative. She used, before marriage, to be quite a belle, and was often known to trip the light fantastic. Ono evening as my father played a tune on the violin, my mother arose, and in the moat graceful manner possib ] e to conceive commenced to dance around the room; I didn't know what to make of ib. I was speechless with consternation and delight. My father looked on in surprise. , Never in the whole course of my life had I seen such a thing attempted in ray father's house. It was delicious, and I got a lesson then which has lasted me ever since. I think to this day, that if my mother had danced offcener and said the cathecism a little less it would have been better for all of us. If you have a talent for music cultivate it ; for dancing, cultivate Jfc ; whatever gifts God has given you make the most of them whethe* 1 of voice, foot or' oyo." It is not to be understood that Mr.' Beecher advocates dancing at improper places Hud at unseasonable hours with immoral companions ; but that ho means that dancing can be harmlessly introduced into our homes ta » social amusement. ' Artless, but Shrewd : A child, while walking through an art-gallery with her mother, was attracted by a statue of Minerva. ' *»<\Vhd is that ?" said ahe. "My child, thafc_ xs.Mjnorva, the goddess of wisdom." "Why 4 didn't they make her husband too ?" " Because she had none, my child," " That was because aho was wise, wasn't it, mamma ?" wjw the wtlo« reply,