RANDOM NOTES

Dominion, Volume 28, Issue 91, 11 January 1935, Page 8

RANDOM NOTES

Sidelights on Current

Events

(By Kickshaws.)

One expert declares that many people seem to laugh through wool. But not at present prices though.

It has been revealed that there is a moth that makes straight for chocolate. The question arises as to whether this is a problem for mothers or a problem for mothers.

The Prime Minister of Australia has decided to leave for England owing to the uncertainty of the meat situation. He seems determined not to risk pot luck at home.

“That recent French translation lacks something which at our school we always insist on,” says “Stratford Atta Bowe.” “Both ‘ma tante’ and ‘mon oncle’ were missing. This surely is a mistake. From my memory of Monsieur Chardenal, the translation should be as follows: ‘Ma tante avait une bonne cuisiniere. Elie etait tres bonne cuisiniere. Mon oncle qui est dans le jardin avec le lion avait un coteau. Comme de bonnes cuisinieres s’en vont la cuisiniere s’en alia. Ma tante beaucoup parlait.’ ” [“Kickshaws” thanks “5.A.8.” for pointing out the omission, which forms such an important part in Anglicised French prose.]

The statement on the part of the German authorities that hanging has never given rise to any complaints is incorrect. If those responsible had made a closer study of this method of inflicting the death sentence, they could have found some remarkable complaints. Indeed, a certain beachcomber in Samoa, it is related, actually sued the authorities because they did not hang him properly. The individual had previously been hanged for his crimes. The job, however, certainly cannot have been done very thoroughly, because he came along to the local magistrate a few days later with a nasty twist in his neck and a burning grievance against the authorities for making such a bad job of his hanging. The delicate situation arose as to whether the man should be given an opportunity to be hanged again properly, or be given a lump sum down for not having been hanged properly in the first case. It will be seen therefore that hanging is not always so satisfactory that there have been no complaints. One can but sympathise with the individual mentioued above and hope his case reaches the German authorities.

In the old days there were numerous instances of men who had not been hanged properly. When Captain Kidd, the notorious pirate, was hanged at Execution Dock the rope broke. But his case was not so curious as that of a man named Smith, hanged at Tyburn for robbery. After he had been hanging for 15 minutes a reprieve arrived. The unfortunate man was thereupon cut down and attended by doctors. Eventually he recovered. On regaining consciousness he said that when he was first “turned off” for some time he was sensible of very great pain and felt his spirits in a strange commotion violently pressing upwards. He then saw a great blaze of light which went out with a flash. The resuscitation appears to have been even more painful than the hanging. In fact “halfhanged Smith” reviled the doctors for bringing him back to life. One might add that the same gentleman came within an ace of being hanged on two subsequent occasions. In fact but for the death of the prosecutor on the eve of the trial, Smith would have been hanged for the second, time. ♦ * *

It is a curious fact that the recent instance of a counter at Monte Carlo going on winning for a dead man can be capped by au almost identical example that occurred ou the Riviera some years ago. An elegantly dressed man entered the casino and put a thousand franc counter on p. certain number. The number won. Tlie gambler did not withdraw his winnings but remained motionless with his head buried in his hands. Play continued. The same number won several times successively. The croupier each time added to the gambler’s winnings. Eventually the man had won over £4OOO. As he remained motionless a woman touched him,in order to draw attention to his good luck. To her horror she found that she was addressing a corpse. Death had been caused by heart failure following a heavy meal. One curious outcome of this curious story is that the widow claimed her husband's winnings. The Casino, however, argued that a dead man could not gamble for money, and had he not died he would not have left repeated winnings on the same number. It is an interesting story but is it just coincidence that the identical thing has again occurred?

Death often plays as grim a jest as the recent case at Monte Carlo. Was it not a well-known figure in history who said, “Let this crust choke me if I lie”’ and the crust duly choked him. Indeed, it is said of an old-time Chinese monarch that lie would give the populace their wish if they wished when a shooting star soared into the sky. So the story goes they all wished his death and he died there and then. In more humble walks of life we have the case of a stonemason named Logan. He laid the last coping stones, when the building collapsed and killed him. There is, of course, the classic case of a famous general who, having survived shot and storm behind the lines for many a year, was run over by a donkey cart when he returned to England to receive the plaudits of the crowd. He was as unlucky as that German burglar who entered a provision store by the skylight. He filled his pockets with sausages, ate heartily, and proceeded to climb out the wav he had come. His foot slipped, a string ot' sausages became looped about his neck, caught ou a projection and hanged him.

It is only fair to fate to add that destiny sometimes plays pranks not quite so grim as that of the Monte Carlo type. Just after they had spent thenlast ninejiencc on food two nrospector> dug up in Triuisvtuil ti diiiinond oi 20 carats. As they were packing up in despair, the man at the bottom of a pit (lug in search of gold, hitched his pick to the line and signalled for it to be hauled up. It caught on a projection. When the prospector clambered up to disengage the pick he found it caught in the seam of gold for which they had been looking for months. Another down and out prospector, having exhausted all his resource's, sat down on a log to consider the best way to commit suicide. While so brooding he unconseiouslv hacked at the ground with his pick Suddenly the pick struck something. This broke his suicidal reverie. The result was the discovery of the "Welcome Stranger'’ iiuguet. worth £3OOO. The moral of all this Is presumably that one's luck will turn it yon wait long enough. Flys when they take oft do so backward. Luck seems to be be built on a similar plan.