STUNNER & STUNNED

Dominion, Volume 10, Issue 3164, 16 August 1917, Page 6

STUNNER & STUNNED

THE "BOOSTER" AT WORK

A TRAMCAR INTERLUDE

(By "Sylvius.") He was a natural home-town booster. It is a genus not very iirnily established i in Wellington, but is ever so advanced , in America. There's something in the atmosphere of the place against it. Not that Wellington people do not love Wellington. Oh, dear, 110! Wellington has blown the deep, luscious draughts of its clean mountain and ocean air too deeply into tho lungs of residents of long standing to be ejected by tlie ephemeral "hot air" talked about other places that need not bo mentioned. Still, Wellington lias not beon a happy breedingground of home-town boosters. Yet this man was a regular hometown booster, with goods to sell, and had not the slightest regard for the graces of other towns or respect for sensitive ear-drums. My ear-drum did not 'have to bo sensitive to catch what he said as wo rode into town from Lyall Bay on one of the recent fine afternoons. The 6unshino had entered his soul, and set the motor going that wagged liis "booster." His audience was a meek little man. "See that magnificent sweep of the beach," he continued (one could not assume it to be the start, as the little man already looked bored to stupefaction). "See where the breakers crash from horn to liorn—finest bit of beach in New Zealand, without any possible doubt. And let me toll you this—Lyall Bav is destined to bo the marine sanatorium of the North Island. Wait and you «ee. I could sell you a section close to the beach for a reasonable figure—no chance next year. Look at the progress of the place. The whole of this bar of sand that the waters of the Pacific used to wash was once offered to the city for i£°oo. The council—city councils are always blind-turned the offer down. Worth half a million to-day—there s unearned increment for you! My boy, this Wellington is ftoing to be a great place. One can feel it in the air! The little man smiled wearily. "I don't mean what von mean. This nir is tho finest on Rod's earth; our I death rate is the lowest; our birth rate the highest. There's vim, strength, vitality in tlie air, sir, for all your la There r 'had been no lanrhter really. It was onlv a tired smirk, which bad aroused the spirit of th« booster. ".\h here wo are—Evans Bay—fine stretch of water. Now. mark me, one (lav this is going to be a great maritime mart—a veritable °. f s -; 1 traffic. Did you set that, Minimal will be a second Wellington . This .bay will be lined with wharves on both sides. Tiller lias a scheme for reclaiming the hfc at'tho lead of the tar. Tha . nark- Kilbirnie-or is it Crawford Paik? T don't know-is the beginning of it. One of these days we'll tonple some ot that Miramar ridge into the s/a theio and open up the fln'fc and reclaim the bay by the same process. Good scheme, said the mild little man without enthusiasm. . . "Wonderful! Ha, lulbirme and Hataitai—marvellous growth here. Houses come up in a night like mushrooms, and are plucked by the home-seekers betore the dew is oft them." "What is duo on them? asked the mild little man, making a desperate attempt to appear interested. " 'Dew—d-e-w,' I said. How do I know what is duo on them? See that one with tho red-tiled roof and steps-sell you that cheap-nice sunny situation, '<r 0 od view of the trams-sliow you tho plan in town—excellent investment! "Hoary old Mount Victoria—fine lolty mountain. They say Captain Cook placed that cannon on the top of tho lull to protect his ship (which had sailed across the isthmus from Lyall to Evans Bay) from attack by the Natives. Great stoategist was Cook ." Tho sudden plunging of tho car into tho tunnel cut off the booster's current for a brief moment. He soon recovered. "There you are—out again. Isn t that fine? Look at those busy blocks down there. Only a raupo swamp a few years a«o. My, how this town does leat) ahead! Look along this street. That's Austin Street—beautiful sunny aspect, unpoilut<nl air, backing on to tho Town Belt our areat city lung, sir!" "Citv what?" asked the mild little man, feeling that ho ought to break in. "City lung—whero we breathe, so to '"I* don't see anybody breathing up there. Don't you breathe in the town?" "Oh, bless you. ves—lung, only a figure of speech. That's what the city councillors call it when. they wish to, jirevent people playing golf on it. Of course, when they don't play, they don t visit the Town' Belt. Councillor Castle wants tho council to make a farm out of it in order to supply milk to the city." "Is he the humourist of the council ?' asked the little man, who was from Tarannki - , . , "Oh. no, he's the zoologist—gets people to present, ducks and weasels and things to the 'Zoo.' Ah, here we are. Courteiiav Place. Now, mark me, this is going to be tlie greatest business street in Wellington." "Indeed!"

"Yes indeed. See that line of buildings along tho. south side —all built within the last two years. Host of it due to the energy and faith of one man, whom thev threaten to call tho King of Courtenay Place. Host of it bought for about

.£9o'to «£IOO a foot. Some owners were refused JJI2S a foot for their holdings. You see that, according to the lay of the town, it is of paramount importance that the cars bound for any of the oasfern suburbs should avoid the uphill pull in Cuba Street, so thev have to come along here, where they get a line as straight as o rod with the Cape Palliser light. And the trip from tho T.amblon 'Railway Station is only a nicket. Tf you've anv big money to invest. X likn Cnnrtenay Place out of all in New Zealand!"

"Tt's certninlv a well-blocked street," the little man. "This is Winder's Corner—see all the windows! Ha! ha! We turn down here. . . There's the Town Hall, where the Mayor lives and the orcan plavs. Magnificent edifice, noble nile; a bit smokou to windward. . . .What diijni'v and strength! 'Suprema a situ!' That's a bit funny, you know, for the Town Tra'l is built on reclaimed land, and only a few vear.s aso the timber'ships ns>>d to lie on tlie supreme site occupied by the Town ITall. That shows you I'ow we push things along here. . . . Yes, those are the wharves—finest in the world, and what is more, facing the and safest harbour in the Empire." "Indeed!"

"Indeed it is, sir. . . . That's the best G.P.O. in Australasia—all stone m!o; and Hint's the Government Life Building, sometimes known as the pressman's seismometer. It's on a floating foundation, von know. All! Here's tho Railway building—fine block—and there's the stnlf tmoping out. My word, it must bp I o'cloelc. Tlia.t big structure—larsr-e-t wooden building in tho world—the Government Buildings—not a doubt of it. Over there the finest House of Parliament is being erected in pure marble. The "Ministers carefully inspect every slab before it is stuck up—that's why flic work is being speeded ire. 7've a

nice property overlooking Hie House. Suit. yon. T'm sure, if you want a houto property." "What's that little, low. wooden building down there?" nskeil tho mild little

man. "What's that? Oh. that red brick building! That's the finest Printing Office in this hemisphere. Marks runs dial show. Short of paper now; never short of a yarn!" "No; that low building, like a.n elongated cowshed?" persisted the stronger. "Thai's a—well, it's a—railway station. But don't worry alwut that, for we are cning to have the greatest railway station in the Pacific up in "Bunny Streetafter the war. It's been promised now for ten years, and not even a Government can keep on promising much longer - . "That's the railway station, is it? Just in time, too. Good-bye. Mr. Reelestate; T've enjoyed Hie spin round i-ou've given me. But 7 don't think I'll *uy nroperly just now. T'm squeezing in all I can for the new War Loan. It strikes mo as u good thing. Still, it's

a groat little old town, this Wellington; butJiavo you 6een Patea? Good-bye!" Wil'li a wintry smile, tho little man passed into the station, and his guide, philosopher, and friend (who had been fo sure that the money was as good as iu his pocket) turned aivay, and said a naughty word out loud.