THE CHANGING SCENE.

Dominion, Volume 5, Issue 1266, 23 October 1911, Page 6

THE CHANGING SCENE.

_ (, —_ ■■ A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW. (Bt M.C.k.) An excited cablo message informed U3 la.st week that "tho well-known airmen, the,Wright brothers, announce that they believe they have discovered the secret ' of tho vulture's flight." Wo feel perfectly euro that tho discovery will bear out the theory so often advanced a few years ago that the rapid movement of tho bird's wings has at least something to do with its strange skill in travelling through the air. It must be tho wings that do it. It is an absorbingly inbrost- , ing and important topic, and we should |. .like to dwell npon it. But it is to be "''regretted that tho Wright brothers should ;' not have given their time and talent to '■■■ discovering the seoret of tho slug's fond- -• npss for lettuces and young peas. If tho i ■ ting's taste could bo investigated we : : might find means of training it up to •• an appreciation of the common dock as ,'. an article of diet. Tho Messrs. Wright ;. might also have done better if they had ■.investigated other harassing problems. ' Hero aro some questions we arc always . asking ourselves: Why is our tram just gone? Why does one always run out of '; tobacco on Sundays? Why is Mr. L. M. Isitt? And so on. In tho meaatimo we need not go to America for news of per- - sons who believe they have discovered ' baffling secrets. Sir Joseph Ward believes ho has discovered tho reason why : tho public has left the Budget untasted '.; on their plates. Mr. R. Fletcher believes ;';ho has discovered tho secret of economic .■ srror; it is due, ho holds, to tho queer idea that Freetrado is different from Pro- ■•' tection. Ho has discovered that to bo n ■ Freetrader you must be a Protectionist "also. Crowds of other gentlemen are 'on platforms claiming to havo dis- ,■.• covered the seoret of making the country perfect in ono act, of abolishing poverty, and of making everybody good and strong and beautiful. It is indeed an ago of ' jntenso mental activity. One of the many quaint statements by • the Attorney-General at Paraell led Mr. Herries last week to ask tho Prime Min- ;. ister if Sir John Findlay bad been stat- ' ing tho Government policy. Sir Joseph Ward replied, with great brevity: "Sir John Findlay was addressing tho people in his capacity as a candidate." Alas! for the faacies • and Dleasant romances TVe wove from tho Minister's speech! There wag nothing we wanted he wouldn't have granted— T?e thought him a pearl and a peach. In , , tones sweet as honey ho sooko of the " money He'd em that we got from. the State, But the voice that was candied—Sir. Joe. was quite candid— , ■\?a3 that of a caudibatb. . ■ . ■He was cheered and clapped and shaken-handed, And ever wider -\&i heart expanded, And wo didn't know he was juat a candid* ' - .Andid-andid-ate. It was very unkind; but we don't much mind ■ That hie promises all were air; We're sensible folk, and can take a ioke, Though this was heavy to bear. It would have consoled us if someone had told ,us His love for us, really was straight; But hiß /( very affection appears, on inspec- ; tion, The guile of the candidate. Wo were pleasant, he.'said, bright, openhanded; Ho seemed isincere, if ever a man did; But all the timo he wae just the candid- '■'-. Andid-andid-ate. Alas! no credit—Sir Joe haa said it— la due to what Ministers say As they near.tie daivn of election morn: It's part of tho game they play. Tho3e passionato chaps will eoon collapse To a natural normal state, And only a dream next year will seem The .words of tho candidate. Sir Joseph's ■words were clear and candid; • There'e nothing unfair or under-handed, So long as. you know that he spcaka as ' a candid-Andid-andid-ate. The editor of a paper published in Nice, so a'cable message tells us, "received a grievous sword thrust in the chest during a duel with a local con■•frero." ' Tho anti-duelling party are jubilant, holding that this incident conclusively proves that there is an ele,!sn«nfc of danger in French duels. .' '"The Prime Minister, who ttos more heated than usual, declared," etc This i 3 £rom the Government organ. Sir Joseph says he was not more heated than usual on tho occasion referred to. Our casting vote goes in favour of tho 'obviously correct mean of these two statements, to wit, that Sir Joseph was only jusrt as heated as usual. It takes a very delicate instrument to detect small variations in high temperature. ■ . "My old," said the intelligent foreigner, "it goes bad for Sir Bart. I read the journals; ono se«s in them only the speeches. I March for the Wardites. No good. Not ono friend! By blue!" "Why," said the Wardite, "there arc .just as many out for Sir Joe as for liassey." . ■ "Ha! You mock, yourself of me. What? You are serious? Where are thej , ? Of one side I see tho enemies, who cry, 'Out with Sir Bart!' Of the other side. 1 see the Labour men. 'Citizens,' they cry, 'out with Sir Bait. A bas tho Ministry.' . On third side, the Independents. Never I have not seen a so great exposition of independence. But whero are these Wardites? Even Sir Findlay is become heretic." "Haven't you read the Liberals' ■ speeches?" "But yes. The Liberals Independents. Theso misters here—what do they say? 'Ladies and misters,' they say, 'I am •elavo of no party.. -I preserve the right to vote as my heart brdei-3. Perhaps I iiicline to Sir Bart, when ho has right. Otherwise, see mo independent.'" "There you are. They are Government, supporters, but in a general way. Their consciences " "But what vaiuo that? Sir Bart—he wishes not, the man. with the conscience. Not so?-Then they are not his friendsi How to :rcily on dhem? Not possible. Poor Sir Bart." : "Oh, they'll support him all right But they're really independent." "I • not comprehend. What is it, this independence? Why not say they are Wardites? My old, I know these independent misters. It is tho independence of the tethered mule. So far a3 the rope permits, ho will yield not to orders how to go. But when his conscience drive him to dash off, there is tho rape. Click, bnmp! Tho gallop cease. But inside tho limit of libc rope, nothing more free. And tho rope is not long? Alas! Then I shall not read the speeches. I imagined it was a revolution. The great heap of independence! i How it is glorious, I said. Ono lives and learns, dear mister. The revolution is not yet." In the House last week a Ministerialist member sakl that ho was over by the Opposition benches, and heard the Leader of the Opposition say that 4 voto should be struck out "It was a pri-J

vato conversation," said Mr. Massey, a good. deal staggered. "No," said the member, "you said it to me." "Which suggests the conundrum, "When is a private couversafcioni not a private conversation?" In tho meantime:— Shall wo write a little essay called "On Privato Conversations"? Just an Elianic gossip on the joys of quiet chat? It's a, truly tcmptini subject, but wo know our limitations—and in any we'd rather touch a sadder point than that. We ordinary mortals ha.ve at least the consolation that inherc3 in private converse when we'ro raw from Fortune's rasp. But thinli about the chap to whom the private conversation is a non-existent pleasure, nay, a thins he cannot Rrasn. lie sees a. party chatting and he feels a wonder dim: why don't they tell the public all tho substance of their chat? They se;m to get a plea-sure that has never come to him from the privacy that strikes him as extremely dull and flat. Oh, sad it is and pitiful! I weep for such as ho. I weep about tho tragedy of 6itch a wretched state. But sadder still their case, is who all unsuspectinKiy take him off into the corner for a private tete-a-tete.