THE CHANGING SCENE

Dominion, Volume 1, Issue 282, 22 August 1908, Page 6

THE CHANGING SCENE

A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW. (By M.C.K.) In tho advertisement calling for applications for tho position of Superintendent of the Wellington Zoo, applicants aro informed that tliey must supply " a recent photo." This stipulation must bo a result of tho recent activity of tho Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. "The flesh-pots of Egypt" were introduced as a, topic for discussion at an annual church mooting in Dunedin recently, according to the "Otago Daily Times," but in a different. connection from that in which tho phrase is usually applied. Tho gentleman speaking had dealt with tho collections, which, ho said, might havo been better. Ho went on to say that such cgmmodities as butcher's meat, potatoes, and bread were not usually spoken of at a church meeting, but when tho price nf such rose to such an extent as to mako a difference in tho collection they were obliged to take notice of such commodities. —News item. No outer noise and riot i Of worldly happenings mar Our meetings cool and quiet, Where no loud Pistols are, Where never strikos find mention. Whore Floets get no attention, Where speakers never trench on ' A topic secular, ' Whero from tho clash' of partios A man may steal away, Where quito ignored the mart is (Or was, until to-day). But strange words now wo're hearing That have a pregnant bearing On tho rate of disappearing Of the rare reluctant "tray." We're face to face with mutton, And sad is our estate: The frequency of button Observed by us of late • Means that the recent risej Of various market prices Have brought about a crisis, Reflected in the plate. To others be it comic, . To us a serious fact That causes economic Collectiohs should contract, ■. That High Finance, that fleeces The customers of Croesus Should tako our throopenny pieces. Remorseless and exact.

: No more to ns a solemn Aloofness orthodox: We'll read the "money" column, And note tlio mores in stocks; Meanwhile tho politician Can know the State's position: Silver—a strong position, Buttons—impending rocks, A correspondent sends the following clipping from The Dominion with a request for an explanation of what ho calls "a strange remark":— . , "I said to one of the American officers," Mr. Carncross declared, "' After the way we received you would you not find it a bit hard to come and bombard this city?' He thought for a moment, and replied, 'Sir, I wouldn't come.' And," Mr. Carncross added, "the earnest manner in which he spoke demonstrated that he spoke from tho heart." Rule 3618, sub-section xii, of the United States Navy regulations provides as follows: —•"When war is declared,;the Admiral shall issue circular invitations to all officers and men, in the form duly provided, to wit, as follows' Tho pleasure of A.B.'s company is requested at a War, .to be held to-morrow, and on succeeding days. R.S.V.P.' It is enjoined on all men that they shall reply signifying their acceptance or declination of tho invitation, as speedily , as possible, in order that the cooking arrangements can be completed." This will doubtless , removo our correspondent's bewilderment. Curiously enough, the ignorance which he displays respecting naval matters is . very general. Even amongst British Government officials there is a surprising lack of acquaintance with foreign naval methods. For example, there has been a strong agitation in Great Britain for the building of new battleships by way of reply to tho German Dreadnoughts. A gentleman, who withholds his name, recently wrote to the Kaiser on the subject, and- has received the following reply:—"You are quite right. We are building the Dreadnoughts simply for dredging purposes. Sooner than fight Groat Britain, I would grow a beard." Tho recipient of this letter declares that tho Emperor itnder-

lined " beard " so strongly that his sincerity' is obvious. "I said to one of the American officers: 1 After, the way we received you would you not find it a bit hard to come and bombard thij city?'"—Mr. Carncross. " It is estimated that tho men of the Fleet left £20,000 behind them."—Auckland message. - "Of course, in:entertaining the Flcot, we were not looking at tho mercenary aspect at all."—-Sir Josoph Ward. We have dined you, we havo wined you—out of sheer affection, mind you—and tho cash you left behind you We'll embalm ■ < As a dear and sweet memento of tho gaiety you lent to ovory function that wo wont to Arm-in-arm. If in after years it chances (I am prone to morbid fancies) that a set of circumstances Should arise That would send another Sperry on a mission far from merry, out for slaughter, to our very Pained suprise; Could you bo so baso a bounder as to train a twonty-pounder on the city wliero you found a Welcomo warm? Would your conscience not. upbraid you with the speeches that wo mado you and tho compliments wo paid you . / In duo form? Shall our streets bo cannonaded that your sailormen paraded till thoy couldn't walk unaided i And thoy guessed That "though may bo blood is thicker (hie) than warrer, it's your liquor knocks all tondcncy to bicker ' Galley west"?

Could yon pull a hostile trigger on the town that spent with vigour (I forget the actual figure Of tho fuss)? Could you blow us all to blazes when wa swopped on various daises flags and flippers, froth and phrases— You and us? (Loud cries of "No!")

Tlio following is portion of a paragraph which appears to have reachcd this office by mistake:—"Crimson morn, and tho sky flecked with snowy tufts as from tho plumes of some Paradisial eaglo winging his supernal way through tile empyrean to do homage to tho sun. Far down tho street, slumbering in .the nik:, a huia! A atrideup); cou-

coaled in a blur of sound, mysterious, menacing as tho growl of a giant in chains. Suddenly tlio noiso swells into a deafening volumo of roaring chaos, and tho sun gleams on a quivering line of blatant brass, the first hint of tho mighty mechanism to which puny man has harnessed tho hellish force of the devastating thunderbolt of Jove. On it sprang! What man born of woman and fired with tho grand traditions of tho Corinth of tho south could look unstirred on the magnificent monster hurling its terrific way on tho gleaming steel that lies servant-wise to its feet. It is tho tram! In very truth tho tram! Tho tram is coming into being beforo our eyes—the tram of tho songful morning, holding in leash tho dread forces of firo and death 1 Surely tho latent devilry of tho gigantic dynamo, purring and screaming in diapason and arpeggio con amore, will leap forth to ruin. On it springs, by tho gods of Hollas!" Tho paragraph will bo forwarded ontiro to tho owner on application.