THE CHANGING SCENE

Dominion, Volume 1, Issue 175, 18 April 1908, Page 6

THE CHANGING SCENE

' A BIRD'S EYE VIEW. , (Bt a oasdaii CnnoNioiiEß.) Much interest has been aroused by Mr. Pritohard's statement that, upon being refused an audience by Mr. Millar, ho ''loft the building in a , manner which, I fear, did not disguise my contempt for Ministerial autocracy."' The ' popular idea ■ concerning themodoof Mr. Pritchard's exit is given in tho following- verses, which should 1 bo moved in tho form of a resolution at the next meeting of -the Wellington Trades and Labour Council:—-

.That'll show yer, Mister Millar, thatawucker 'ain't a worm; ; : , .That'll. show: yer as wo .still retains tho hart . •. o' bom'. firm: - . ■ Since yor rose ter greatness, Millar, since yer took the title "Hon.," ' J Ter seem tar' 'ave fergotten as we won't 'bo r- treaded on. ~ , ■ .• Yer may frnns an' yer may foam, .. . ' Yer may hanswor, "Not -at ;'omo," : ."But—yer blodmin'.■ lioffice- winder'll.,need a. '■■-■ ■ glazier Ven. we've pone, v :

* So yer: fancy, Mister Millaiy as yer ; kinder made a score, \'v '■ ■■• -With yer show o'. hinderpendence w'en yor . .slammed yer hoffico'door? ; Do yer. fancy aa the wucker, boin' far above , tho Hact, ■■•;' ...Till swaller unrcsistin'. such' a hojious want o' tact? . ■■■.'■ ■■■ W'ich I harsk yer. fer'ter squint • ■ At Dave Pritchard's gentta ,'int: Pause, oh Millar, pauso' an', shudder 'at that winder starred an' cracked.

: : ./^&Vyyer;thonght r a limit ter the ■■■•■•. wucker's soaring pride, .Won, rebellions!?, ter Pritchard easy haccess ' •. yor denied? " ' . But ye've 'ad a 'olesomo lesson; an' unless yor shows some speed In amandin* yer be'aviour, as the wuckers 'as • decreed, ■Wo shall 6how our 'if»h contomp' In a way yer never dremp': ■ Koto that writin' on. the winder. J. A. Millar, . please take 'eed.

-.■A, local journal quotes with approval Lord Rothschild's statement - that tho. British Licensing Bill would cause a collapse of brewery debentures,. leading to " the' injury ,; . • of insurance . interests," and thenco to " a •' crushing blow to thrift" and such a dieturbanco of tho Stock that- tho i , end would bo "tho annihilation of the present banking system." The local journal adds: "We havo no doubt these words of ->';V oaution will,'have ,- their effect. .Even' the' most ardent of reformers;', ' .. MUST BE SOBERED when ..they realise the .yastness and complexity of the problem." Surely, if anything reV -quires emphasis; it ,is ;that'everybody . " - - ; MUST BE DRUNK ' , if they : really desire to.savo-England. ■■ ; i ... He did not-believe there were any pes.s ini - ; ists un, Kaitangata.-Tho Premier! ;.v*. «••••.. Our-reporter found it still raining heavily ftt .Kaitangata: when ho arrived- in the steam launch provided by the ■ Government, when, after four years', rain,' it had become lappar- ,, ■ ent that some moans of-communication wero desirable.'.. Thee population; was holding- awater v carnival, arid, as our reporter made his way, to the Mayor*- a roar^ofexcitement- : proclaimed , tho victory of the local constablo . t in tho Kerosene Case Race. ■ , " Wot?", said the Mayor, when our repreoontativo reached him,, and invitpd him to • loavo his hencoop, and board tho 'launch. "Wet? Merely a;heavy dew. And you are & .reporter.? ' It is ages since we had a visit from, the Press. < I'm- sorry I can't offer you ~ * whisky, but you'll find this water very • sood.■ Aro ■ we■■■aro.■■■ ■..i\..•: .£■ was. a.littlo. depressed when Lsaw my'shop •: float - away, but I remembered Sir Joseph's i; hearty-words,-and-my heart was as light as a feather when I boarded my old hen-coop. But tho rain; will'stop soon." " You are looking very thin," said tho ■ reporter. ;./:■■■•/ : /. .. " Merely irant of food," .said tbo Mayor. " But .there—what's food when you have a stout heart? And I've done a good deal of paddling about and divin'g in the last few years, looking for the wife. . Can't imagine .where she's, got' to.. And -howVare- things, i going? ' Another surplus?. Good, . good. ■ Have you heard anything of the relief .party that , was being organised for us last year? No? Oh, well, it'll come in duo course, I suppose." . ,- Another race'was held. Tho local constable, was seized with cramp and sank, and . tho launch steamed to' the: spot, round for: half-an-hour, but the unfortunate man did not appear. "He's dead by now," said the reporter in a hushed voice. v.' " Not a bit of it," said the Mayor. " Don't ' tako'a gloomy, view of things. He'll turn up in a day or two. Sir Josoph said.-—-. By. ■ . iho way, how is Sir Joseph? Quite well, ill? I'm glad." ; ; / /, "I suppose you will bo glad when tho flood subsides?" the reporter suggested. "Ye-es,"' said , the Mayor- reflectively. " But I will movo from Kaitangata. My house, you see, was burned down before the flood, and I had no insurance. .Still, IVo got my old hencoop and these clothes. Oh, ' things: are riot too bad. , of wurso, but -what-is av.little inconvenience? 3ut tell me'news. Is the Blackball strike .iettled? No? It will be soon. Hope for )tho best, my,boy. I,hate pessimists.". As our reporter left on the launch, the population stood up on its kerosene cases and broken ■ doors, arid shouted' hearty farewells | across tho water. : : Amongst tho refuse burnt at the Destruc- ■ tor last week wpre .three. sacks of Government papers. The power generated by the burning of the debris goes towards'working; ' . tho sewage pump machinery. ' What. Science', says is-surely true: ; "No waste, is found in' Nature." ■ But faith has faltered .when my view . Embraced the-Legislature. ' Mosquito, spider, snake, and fly Some subtle end have answered. But " Why," ;we asked; in wonder, " why This bosh embalmed in Hansard?" . Tho mystery is .solved at last; Tho orgy of oration- ' . • Has other ends than just to cast ' A gloom upon the nation; - For still resides a soul of. good In-.every seeming evil— In heavy slabs o{ platitude In roaring floods of drivel. The gas that made tho Hansards fat, ; And papers Departmental, ~ And long reports on this and that; / . Have virtues accidental. The speech that failed to fire the heart i \ Or drive along the nation, Now gives Destructor fires a start : And- "

" 'Tis clare, Jawn," said..Mr. • Dooley, "that'mo frind Joe Warrd is th' only wan iv us that has kep' his head in this sad throublo that th' Attorney-Ginral proved not t' exist at Blackball or annywhere but in th' disordhered. brain iv an' Ac' iv Parlymint." " Has ho gaoled th' sthrikers?" asked Mr. Hennessy. ■ "Noj but be the pure forrceiv onadultherated logic ho has provod that he will not do'what ho don't intend t', do, an' that 'what is . may .be or that otherwise it is diff'rent, as th' Case may be. ' What,' ho says at Kait : ahgata, ' is th' position?' says ho. 'T' th' charrgc'that th' sthrikers ai-re on sthriko, I wud reply that th' Guv'mint will not .interfare, does not interfere, an' ■has hot. interfared,' says hfe, '' with . annythiii'j" says he.. Why.'don't ye'do something?', says a .voiee. 'Why? I'll tell ye why,' he says, 'th'.Ac' must .bo upheld. It must not bo dhragged into contemp,' an' th' [ Coourt is. t' bo.rayspicted,' says ho, ' whin I. so command. . But'this is beside th'. .quiai.Aion. i 'Ar-ro wo. t', raysolve t' do without th! Ac, or t' hare it?. :I onh'esitatingly say. wo oa'n't do both,' says^he',;' but th' AttorrneyGinral has ch'arrge ■" ivv th' : Puzzle Department. Th' sooner,'if'we have no' Ac'; th' sooner, wo say we have no ; Ac' an' give up : .pretendm'. that it .is -not so; or otherwise, an? th' sooner th':. people raysolves, th' sooner they will come t' : a decision,'.he says. ' Now, as t f th'-sthrike/'Th' law'mus* bo upheld,, but if th'. strikers sthrike, they disobey th' law, ah' in .that case th' only position I can tako up is that, th' - surrplus is wan million. ' .1 am not a land rationaliser, but I only nationalise lan,' an' th' Attorr-noy-Ginral says that lan' is not nationalised when it is, or ought t' be, an if' not, thin why?' he says." ' . .

"But did he say ■ what .he'd, do t' th' sthrikers?"] asked Mr.'Hennessy.

, "No, Jawn. He's like th' Frinch grammar. Did you see my uncle's gardener's shavin'- strop? v No'; bit, I have, my brother's coachman's false teeth. That's th' way mo'frind Joo : settles th' sthrike. 'A calm,- sthrong man is Joe, with a gr-reat power iv dotachment. 'Sthriko,' he says. ' Sthriko? .sthrite? ' Isn't it th' allred rout ye want t' know.about?' " . '