PARLIAMENTARY “BULLS.”

Cromwell Argus, Volume XXXX, Issue 2130, 8 February 1909, Page 7

PARLIAMENTARY “BULLS.”

SOME INTERESTING SAYINGS. Probably the best “bulls” are bred at Westminster. Some of the best ever made in Lhe House of Commons were those with which Sir Boyle Roche used to convulse his hearers ; one of his most amusing, perhaps, being the following;—“ Mr. Speaker,” he cried, on a certain occasion, “why whould we beggar ourselves in order to benefit posterity ’? What, sir. has posterity done for us ?” When the roar which followed this sally had subsided, he entered upon his lucid explanation:—"Sir by posterity I do not mean our ancestois, but those who come immediately after things.” But “bulls” in, the House are so plentiful that we can coniine ourselves to quite model n examples, without easily exhausting the supply. The very first “bull” made in the House this year must be credited to Mr. Kettle, who represents Tyrone,

East. Dealing with the unemployed question, from the Irish point of view, he repudiated I lie nostrums of

Tariff Reform and Socialism, and declared of the latter : —“ I agree with everything in Socialism, except the theory upon which it is based.”

Several members of the present Government have mixed their metaphors in ludicrous fashion. This Mr. Asquith not long since remarked that “redistribution is a theory subject, which requires delicate handling or it will tread on some people’s toes,” and again, in a debate on the legal position of trade unions, he said that, owing to the discussion being very strictly limited by one of the Standing Orders, “our tongues arc tied, our hands are fettered, and we are really bolting (he air to no purpose.” During a. discussion on lhe Children's Employment Bill, Mr. .John Burns, with an air of tired protestation, said -“I will now repeat what 1 was about to s a y when Hie honourable member interrupted, me.” Mr. Winston Churchill declared, on one occasion, that. Sir Henry CampbellBannerman “bad sat so long on the fence that- the iron had entered into his soul.”

Even Mr Arthur Balfour makes occasional slips of this character. as when commenting' on the fact that Scottish debates were usually conducted in a House which ho described “as an empty theatre of unsympathetic auditors.’’ Mr. (Mudstone once upset (he gravity of the House by charging" an eminent. Conservative with “shaking his head in the teeth of his own words.’’ Sir George Balfour, when referring to a proposed loan to the Indian Treasury, remarked that the paltry sum of £2,000,000 was a “more flea-bite in the ocean and when speaking about Indian military affairs he declared that “the pale face of the British soldier was the backbone of our Indian Army.’’ Mr. Kitchie once spoke of a, “thorny subject which had long been a hone of contention among us.’’ I see several faces around me,” observed a Liberal member of staid demeanour,

“who I know would oppose the bill, and who are not hero on the presi nt occasion.” The West African territories in the neighbourhood of Lake Tchad were once graphically described by a member as “a sluniberinging volcano which at any moment a spark might sot, aflame.”

During a debate upon the second reading of the Irish Land Bill in 1896, Lord Londonderry concluded a period with—“ This is the keystone of the hill ; are you going to kill it ?” Better still was a sentence which he uttered, in 1897, when speaking once more on the Irish land question : —“That, your lordship will see”—referring to a quotation which he had just made —“endorses up to the hilt what 1 have said.” These oratorical efforts were, however, easily eclipsed by Sir Frederick Milner, who, when, in speaking on the Budget, said, “A cow may be drained dry ; and if t’hancellors of the F.xchequer persist in meeting every deficiency that occurs by taxing Hie brewing and distilling industry, they will inevitably kill the cow that lays the golden milk.”

1 mentioned Sir Boyle Roche at the beginning of this article, and 41 famous bull of his—“ Blank never opens his mouth without putting his foot in it"—recalls that of a later day Irish Parliamentarian who, referring to another member, said that

“the worst of So-and- so is that he never opens his mouth without treading on somebody’s corns.’’ Among other Parliamentary word comicalities which strike me as some of the best among a large collection made, the following may be briefly mentioned ; —“ Though not out of the wood, we have a good ship”—

Lord Curzon ; “The interests of the employers and employed arc the -same nine times out of ten, —f will even say ninety-nine limes out of

ten “Ah ! the honourable member opposite shakes his head at that, but he can't shako mine;” “This bill effects such a change that the last leap in the dark was a mere flea-bite “Jn every line of lids bill they have hatched a chicken which will come home to roost.”—

Peter Penn, in the “.English Illustrated Magazine.”