The Rival Babies.

Cromwell Argus, Volume VI, Issue 309, 13 October 1875, Page 3

The Rival Babies.

Uicle Putman's Grand Co-operative Baby Show has not come off yet, but it was Aery near making a start on Saturday aftenbon. Two women with babies enterd the parlor set apart for the little popseywopseys, and, taking seats on opposite sides of the room, proceeded to stare a each other coolly and suspiciously. One wis a tall female with auburn hair, and tb other waa a lump of a woman with v<ry black eyes and a determined look. Neither spoke, but they commenced to unpack their offsprings. The auburnhaired ady finally produced from the midst oi innumerable wrappings a pale scrawnej-looking infant, wearing a considerable gold chain and an expression of melancholy. The other baby was the chip of tXe old block, so to speak—a corpulent cherub with pufy cheeks and big eyes, who proceeded to juck its fat thumbs with much composure. The silence was becoming oppressive, wlun the tall woman broke it. She with affected solicitude,

"What is the matter with your baby, mum 1 The poor little thing looks quice unwell."

The little woman's black eyes snapped, but she answered, with forced composure, " Minerva Geraldine was never ill a day in her life, madam, and she is sixteen months and ten days old. Has your little one been ailing long V The tall woman's hair began to rise up, but she pretended to be looking whereabouts the pin was that was pricking her sad-faced babe, and made no reply. Presently she wound the infant's gold chain around her finger in an abstracted manner, so that the other woman would see it. The rival mother produced a coral necklace with a blue locket, and carelessly clasped it about Minerva Geraldine's neck. Then the other, in tones of alarm, exclaimed,

" Why, Alphonso, you have lost your little gold ring!" Alphonso, who was about thirteen months old, vouchsafed no reply, but only looked sad, and his mother, after a brief search, produced the ring from a needlecase, and, with a glance of triumph, forced it on his finger. The little woman was pale, but compressed her lips with stern determination. Diving down into her basket, she brought out a silver mug and a wax doll with real hair. She trembled with excitement, for she had shown her full hand. She won; the silver mug settled it. " Do you intend to exhibit that overgrown monster here 1" inquired the fieryhaired female, glancing at her rival. " Why don't you let out your living skeleton to a peep show?" screamed the little woman, her eyes snapping with rage. " Woman !" " Creature !"

It looked as if there might be bloodshed, and a humane reporter, who had overheard the wrangle, rushed to interfere.

" la my little darling a monstrosity ?" " Is my Alphonso a living skeleton T Both interrogatories rang out simultaneously with a shrillness that drowned the yelling of the canines and the crowing of the prize roosters in the next apartment. " Ladies," said he, with an expression of great solicitude, "they are both angels. But for heaven's sake don't detain me, for I have been exposed to the scarlet fev " And each exasperated female clutched up her baby, and nursing bottle, and basket, and bjunced out. He was alone and the chances of the show gone.