UNKNOWN.

Clutha Leader, Volume II, Issue 66, 14 October 1875, Page 7

UNKNOWN.

.... .« ♦ '"' t ''"**• r" A little -nonaenpq noiv and tken,- c V ?i&i. , ?7 1 ; g ? * f-*V •* - .4. jsl. . t-. V. it \/\ .? f \ If your are cursed with an insatiable appetite buy-a—plaid-vest,- so that you can, always keep, a, .check . r on your stomachy- -I .A d \i 7. 7 :.; v > Why is an old toper like a man who beats his Wife ?-*BecaUse he delights to liquor,., ••,7-7 :\\.' *.-* ■ -V An exchange has an article on "How .riallsXareriiade;" ;-The subject is one which every man should have at his fingers' end,-- . .An Irishman* wlio . was fettered Jbo another prisoner said, tr Begad HnVf&p is linked to, mine." 'correspondent sadly exclaimes> " How can a coquette die hfl Ppyi ? y.!Sh;e]cad^if T there's; a.man. nsar her and her back hair isn't fixed to suit her. The expression of a : nervous woman's 7 face upon getting into a dentist's chair is something .that up man can imitate until he gets'a-letter from his 'mother-in-law, sharply inquring if that spare room is ready ?: -*. In one part of Norway the longest day is three months. What a splendid chance start a daily paper. If the devil should lose his tail where would he go to : £et another?: : Wlrpbf course, to' the.saloons where tjiey retail bad spirits:'' 11: '-"•' ; "' ;: . ; - '■'■'■'■ l - •" - 7'Don't, that : „it's forty degrees below zero?'' asked a Milwaukee girl, as she was cutter-riding with her lover. He-took-the hint and put his arm around her. ■ A ..schoolboy- being, asked by, the teacher'how he should flog him, replied, " If you please,-sir,' like it upon the Italian system—the heavy strokes upwards, and the down ones light!" Church PreseWafion.-^-Mr.Gladstone •—" Please 'm, is the Church of England worth preserving.?'! Britannia-—" Worth preserving? Dear mc, William, don't you know it's been in a pickle this ever •so long !"-^—* Punch;'- ••' : : «' v a) If you want to teach a dog arithmetic tie up one of his paws, anfl-fie"willput down three and carry,, one every time. _ A man Who attempted ~io break'into Norway's smoke-house') Fulton, was glad to get awaywWith only two hams, .and.those had been somewhat injuried by contact with.sole,leather. , A'very religious 1 PldTtauy being asked her opinion of the organ oF a church, the first time she had ever heard one, replied;:« It •; ■■& a.: very pretty box of whistles, but, ph t it's,,a • awful way to spend' the" Sabbath?'' " ;; :"' • : v When one'looks::,;around (says an American .contemporary), and sees hundreds bf dough-heads 'getting/ rich "doing 1 nothing,- while" brie > is -working like a slave, for tone's: daily bread, it makes a fellow feel as though the butter of this world--was-spread by a stepmother. ' "A! ciiridulsli'p occurs -in; a .catalogue issued by a Well known bookseller. A work in block- jirinti ng ! is 'catalogued, which engravings either from wood'or metal, 12 of which : bear'inscriptions representing scenes of Christain mythology^figures patriarchs, saints, devils, ana "other dignitaries of the '-*•*- The mastery negro in Virginia threatened to give'his" sable attendant a flo|girigif Be boiled his eggs hard again; 7 " You rascal," shouted an engaged -planter, " didn't I tell you to cook those eggs soft ?" " Yes, massa," said the frightened negro, " an'l got up at two o'clock dis mornin', an' biled dem five seems vto mc I .never .kin ffet n de.se eggs softer,'? ""'^Sunday was ,( a J 3elt6iPus J daf-f- c itj was Nature's grand overture; O/Eheisunshine was balmy and f was as gentle as an the birds' melody Man walked fofttT'te the) Country, breathing in the fragrance, bathing his spuHn thejsunshine, and rejoicing in the : glad-niusic of birds. The next 7morning;he was' yelling at the top of ~his voice,.? 4 Where in thunder is that ar ! thick: uridetehirg News. " was* the greater\^ two, hurting: another's feelings.,or:his fingers. Ha mfflmeZffinmmv RighttfvrWyAdeaE ■child," questioner, " and why is it worse to hurt the feelings ?" "-©eeause you can't, tie* a rag round them," exclaimed the dear child. 0 day that there was money in hens, and he proceeded the old through a dozen nne : specimens when til'mS&l Supo&Ssaifif, and i? b « 'fW&f&Mfymm any balm in Gilead. ' ~ 7,v