Santas ditch their sacks

Press, 17 December 1988, Page 21

Santas ditch their sacks

Santas in Australia are tired of seeing red. The jingle has gone out of their bells, and they are digging in their heels about having to dash through any more department stores, shopping centres or street corners. Ho-ho-hoing has turned into no-no-noing as Australia’s thousand or so Santas throw down their bags of toys and stick up for their rights. This uncharacteristic and totally unexpected display of anti-Christmas spirit, especially coming from such a traditionally benevolent group, arose when Australian Santas realised their elves were getting paid more them. Actors’ Equity says the Santas are actors and should get paid the professional rate, rather than as shop assistants as they are now. Their elves, the people employed to help Santa lift children on his knee and take photos, apparently get paid more. As one Santa put it: “We have to remain unruffled when a little girl says she can’t save her best smile for daddy because he’s dead. We have to keep smiling when our beards are pulled, sticky hands are run all over our suits and, if we’re unlucky, when an over-excited child leaves us with a wet lap.” If that’s not acting what is? Santas in New South Wales get about $lO an hour, compared to their elves who get $32 an hour. Actors’ Equity and the Santa training schools have been quick to point out the pressures on Santa both in going through the rigours of learning the job and in working so intensely for four to five weeks. At job interviews, Santas are actually asked to fling their heads back, take a deep breath and belt out a few ho-ho-hos in front of their prospective employers to see which one strikes the right note, whatever that might be. They also have sacks full of mail to answer, and some of the letters are tricky and require a great deal of diplomacy. For example: "Dear Santa, my cat has had kittens. Would you like one?” “Dear Santa, I’m sorry I called you a fake at the school pageant.” "Dear Santa, our house doesn’t have a chimney, park the sleigh on the lawn and I’ll leave the window oepn. Are 40 buckets of water enough for the reindeer?” “Dear Santa, could I have jet?”

IN SYDNEY Judy O' Connor

Then there are the pleas for help: “Dear Santa, can you stop my mother and father fighting? I’ve tried everything. I don’t want anything for Christmas, I just want them to stop fighting.” “Dear Santa, please make my grandpop better. He’s sick with a heart attack.” “Dear Santa, my mother’s a pensioner and doesn’t have any money. Will you bring me a surprise?” •Actors’ Equity is making a test case of the issue of Santa’s pay packet, and Sydneysiders had the novel experience recently of seeing Santa, in full Christmas regalia complete with large jangling bell, take a detour from his busy workshop in a city store and march through the streets, to the N.S.W. Conciliation Commission, where the question was to be given the full weight of judicial consideration. Actors’ Equity represented the Santas and the Retail Traders’ Association argued for the employers. The matter was heard in closed court and eventually stood over. It’s not known whether there will be a decision before Christmas and whether Santa will pick up a cash bonus, plus back pay, after his Christmas Eve rounds this year, or whether he will have to be content with the usual abundance of Christmas cake and sherry. In the meantime, things are back to normal, with Santas soldiering on in their usual fairy castles and magic caves round the city, this time with more of a merry glint than ever in their eyes.

Thankfully, a generous sense of humour is also essential for the job. ¥