Reporter’s Diary

Press, 11 September 1987, Page 2

Reporter’s Diary

Mortar fire ENJOYING a frolicking game of French cricket in Abberley Park with his family and dog, a subsporty chap biffed a loose delivery high, in toe air; The ball wedged: Itself in a tree. To the hysterical acclaim from the family supporters’ club, toe man also neatly lodged the bat in toe branch while trying to pry the ball loose. Ten minutes of fruitless leaping left no choice blit for the father to traipse home to fetch a long implement, leaving his charges bailed up by faithful jiooch to await his return. He scuttled back with a hoe, to find that small daughter had brought bat and ball to earth by pelting toe branch with a bit of wood. It is back to spectator sport from now on.

Rise and fall

LIFE in the Philippines has been even more up-and-down than people realise. A recent visitor there during the troubles saw a notice in his hotel lobby which said: “Due to fault, the elevator indicators sometimes state that the elevator is ascending when it is descending. When the indicator says it is descending, the elevator may ascend. Doubtful guests, please join elevator and await destination.

Mulling maketh millions? IT was in the chilly climes of toe car-park at , Cardrona ski-field that a . colleague learned how the 'rich get richer. offering the fearer a free mulled wine .;hadr,been‘-. stuck to car windscreens. ” Unaware that he was being watched, a yuppie oiled his way out of a deluxe, Continental, beyond-most-normal-means car, and quietly slipped from car to car, nicking the free-wine offers. Of course, toe yup could have been a stylish believer in toe temperance movement; but it clearly did not extend to tempering toe choice of expensive car. Clove, sweet clove AN annual garlic festival in Gilroy, California, sounds like a sneaky tourist deterrent. Several tonnes of calamari, scampi, mushrooms and bread — not to mention the garlic — were stockpiled in Gilroy for toe , gourmet week-end. “We had garlic ice-cream, garlic jewellery, and garlic wine,” said Bevan Sorlle, an organiser. “And naturally, all of the food we prepared included garlic.” Stickybeaks THE best authorities of all — readers — tell us that

there are two preparations available to deter birds from using roofs for artillery practice. Hotfoot . and Migrant are both gels which are spread on the roof. The sticky gel gives birds a fright when they attempt to leave the roof iwrfe an operation which “ takes a little more effort than usual. The theory is that the birds than warn .their chums to keep away. Although toe gels cannot prevent birds offending en.passant, they do stop them roosting and being able to take more.careful* aim. Migrant is made by a Timaru firm, and Hotfoot is imported from Australia. Animal lovers can be assured that the S.P.C.A. gives the preparations its blessing. ; Map wraps FOR the last month, the Survey and Land Information Department has been sending customers their bills wrapped up in little bits of Southland. The Press Association says that transforming the obsolete maps into envelopes is the department’s solution to toe problem of what to do with old stock. Out-of-date maps made by the department used to be turned into scribble pads, but given the nature of some terrain, it was sometimes hard to distinguish which was the scribble side.

—Jenny Feltham