Reporter’s diary

Press, 1 May 1984, Page 2

Reporter’s diary

Mistaken identity A YOUNG English immigrant, recently married in Christchurch, set off full of enthusiasm last Saturday on his first duck-shooting expedition, armed with new gun, all the accessories, and a large number of plastic bags in which to put his prey. He returned from the Selwyn River to his wife’s family’s place with a single feathered object in a plastic bag. One glance at the long, sharp beak protruding from the bag told the family that this was a strange duck. Closer inspection revealed it to be a bedraggled black shag, whereupon the father-in-law, having offered to bury the “duck,” rubbed salt into the wound by giving a detailed lesson in duck identification, using a decoy.

The man’s wife, who remained supportive through the embarrassing affair, said that her husband had not wavered in his determination to become the scourge of Canterbury’s duck population. “At least he knows that he can hit something now,” she said. Agricultural temptress THERE WAS some debate recently about whether the New Zealand Party was a sexist organisation. The party vigorously denied it, but warily circling feminists have swooped on what they see as a tell-tale paragraph in the party newsletter: “The Hawke’s Bay delegate, attractive farmer Jill Hunter, had the honour of moving the first remit and

the conference was under way.” We wonder whether Bob Jones would mind being called “the handsome property developer and politician... ” Show goes on RADIO “U” has been sabotaged. Sometime during last week-end, a vandal or vandals badly bent the station’s 25-metre transmission aerial near the Student Union building on the Ham campus. The popular student-run radio station apologised to its listeners for the weaker signal yesterday, as plans were made to hire a crane for the repair of the damaged mast. The entire operation is expected to cost several hundreds of dollars, but it should not affect the station’s transmission times of 4 p.m. to midnight on weekdays, and 9 a.m. to midnight at week-ends. A spokesman said the vandals had probably used a vehicle to bend the strong alloy mast, which is stayed by 16 wires. The motive for the sabotage, if there was one, is unclear. Christian week THE CATHOLIC Bishop of Christchurch, the Most Rev. Brian Ashby, will launch “Christian Action Week” in Christchurch on Sunday, June 24. This year’s theme will take George Orwell’s “Nineteen Eighty-Four” as a starting point for an ecumenical proramme in which New Zealanders will be encouraged to examine the condition of their society. The Orwellian themes, “freedom is slavery,” “war is peace,” and “ignorance is strength” will be used to help Christians to find out the implications in New Zealand today of such con-

cepts as human rights, national security, and “the manipulation of truth.” Down to earth SOME New Zealand politicans might do well to note this comment of the Papua New Guinea Opposition member, Sir Julius Chan, on that country’s 1984 budget: “The only time an economy should be cooled down is when it has heated up. Unfortunately, we have never been in that position.” Oyster theft A READER wonders if it was mere coincidence that the theft of 100 dozen fresh raw oysters from the Rangiora Fish Supply, in High Street, Rangiora, at the week-end happened just after the announcement of an increase of 12 cents a dozen. in the price of oysters. Criminal or law-abid-ing oyster lovers have little to complain about, really: the price of the delicacy had not risen since 1981, and then only by a few cents. Limited vocabulary A CHRISTCHURCH couple wanted a budgerigar to entertain their young children. They obtained one from the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruely to Animals. They placed the pretty little bird’s cage on the back seat of their car, and had just driven off when it shrieked repeatedly, in unprintable terms, for them to decamp smartly. They decided to keep the bird, although its vocabulary is strictly limited to those two words. No doubt its previous owner got sick of the abuse. —Peter Comer