Home and people Men ‘must take greater role in parenting’

Press, 30 September 1983, Page 14

Home and people

Men ‘must take greater role in parenting’

By

OLIVER RIDDELL

Women s health is increasingly being seen as a branch of health in its own right. This change in attitude is particularly striking among Maoris, who see the health of Maori women as being specially at risk. The Opposition youth spokesman, Dr Peter Tapsell (Eastern Maori), who is also a doctor, is very concerned. While the greater opportunities available to women have brought some problems, they have also improved women’s over-all health, according to Dr Tapsell.

They are more active, take greater part in sports, and are physically fitter and stronger. They have greater opportunities to take part in a broader and more interesting world, and this has enabled them to develop much greater mental and spiritual health. From time to time it is said that the family is an outmoded concept, but he does not believe that. The family — not just the nuclear family but the extended family with grandparents, grandchildren and other relatives — is still the best human social unit, he says. It provides a more normal and healthy development for children, but changes are needed in the individual responsibilities within the family unit.

Men must in future take a greater role in parenting, Dr Tapsell says. Men must modify their roles so that women have a greater chance, and the stimulation that comes from doing other work than housework.

Equally, those women who choose to remain at home and work as houseminders should not be disadvantaged compared with their working sisters. That is certainly not the case today.

The woman who stays at home to mind her children is greatly disadvantaged, and it is an important task for Parliament to make better provision for homeminders, he says. The mother with small children, whose husband

brings home a working man’s wage, carries the major burden for the family unit. There is no question that in some ways it is detrimental to her health. She often suffers from physical exhaustion; she often lives in relative isolation; she often suffers a good deal of mental stress. When her children are grown up she finds that she lacks the social skills and inter-personal relationships which allow her to take on new and added interests. She often suffers from depression known as “the empty nest syndrome.” Dr Tapsell sees the feminist movement as one of a range of movements — such as for “black rights” — to bring about social change, to right injustice, and to overcome oppression. The feminist battle is by no means over, and he says it may never be over. But it has achieved a great deal and much of this will in the long run benefit women’s health.

He sees disturbing signs that women are now facing some of the health hazards that were once the preserve of men. These include:— ® An ominous rise in cigarette smoking, with high rates of lung diseases and cancer.

© A steady rise in alcoholism. © An increase in heart disease.

@ A rise in mental breakdowns.

® Extra stress from those both working and child-minding. Dr Tapsell says better programmes are needed for women — better provisions for pre and post-maternal leave from work; better child-care facilities; and more creches at the work place. There are some tremendous moral problems which society must face. He believes that eventually it will be the women who make the moral choices for everyone.

Everyone is becoming very concerned with the amount of violence towards women. For some reason there is a frightening increase in wife and girl-friend-bashing, and rape. Some of the crimes have been bestial in their ferocity. No-one has been able to explain why, or to prevent it. He thinks the reason for the increase is one of sheer selfishness and lack of respect for other people. It might be overcome by teaching inter-personal relationships. Violence has become a major problem for women, and even those not subject to actual physical violence often suffer mental stress from fear.

Obesity is a major problem for Maori women, Dr Tapsell says. He believes that as the social position of Maori women continues to climb, their pride will overcome this problem.