Random reminder

Press, 24 March 1980, Page 24

Random reminder

TIP FOR TAX

An old acquaintance of ours was doing the dishes on his own as his wife had gone out with a friend who also found a play on at the Court Theatre more edifying than an apron on at her kitchen sink. As he tenaciously hoed away at the dried-on crust round the bowl the rice pudding had been burnt in, he could not help thinking how strange it was the government had not thought of a repetitive tax on marriage. After all, far more took up matrimony than pottery and if a marriage license were payable annually — sales tax payable on production figures — amusement tax —etc. and etc. — the possibilities were amazing. ' ’ • o after he had finished the dishes, wiped down the table, the stove and the-bench,; and swept up-.the. crumbs, he found a pencil and paper and took down a few preliminary notes later to lie fofwarded to bis beloved p.m. ~ 1. Should the license not be renewed

; on the due date would: (a) the marriage be annulled? i (b) the parties concerned be obliged . to start from scratch and leave for a fortnight’s honeymoon? (c) Could a late fee charge allow the : couple to carry on? (d) Should they be fined for doing it I without a license? 2. After 25 years could one be granted honarary rights as a veteran? 3. If one spouse left before six - months were up would the other party : be entitled to a refund or another spouse for the unexpired term? 4. Should there be a production tax ; how would the value of the progeny be assessed? 5. Would it be illegal and subject to I 6. Would the husband be allowed a , night out with the boys. ; penalty to live together unlicensed? > 7. He was still pondering on 7 when I his wife returned and wanted supper.