The flexible approach

Press, Volume CXII, Issue 33033, 28 September 1972, Page 11

The flexible approach

Traditionally, the brides family has the prerogative of determining the size and style of the wedding, for they bear the major portion of the expenses involved. That is, if one sticks to the traditional rules. Often, for parents with a family of girls, to do so is likely to be castastrophic, if they all want a formal “white wedding with all the trappings.” Elopements might well be considered—and even encouraged!

And regretted later on. You miss out on some once-in-a-lifetime memories. For, admitted or not, at the top of the list for most girls is a church wedding that will see her as a

radiant bride, exchanging vows with the man she loves, before a happy gathering of friends and relations, followed by the wedding reception and good wishes implicit in the gifts guests bestow towards a future home.

So — don’t let tradition price you out of a formal wedding, if that’s what you want. Share the expense with your parents if necessary. Both of you. It could be a gesture future father-in-laws would appreciate! The costs of the wedding are customarily divided as follows —but adjust them to suit yourselves—and your parents.

The bride (or her family) usually pays for: • Invitations, announcements and enclosure cards. • Wedding dress, veil, accessories and trousseau. • Bouquets for maids of honour, bridesmaids, flower girls. • Flowers for the church and reception. • Engagement and wedding photographs. • Fees for the sexton, organist, and soloist. • Rental of aisle carpet, marquee or other equipment. • Reception, including food, beverages, music,

decorations and professional services. • Transportation of bridal party to church and reception. • Groom’s wedding ring (if it’s a double-ring ceremony). • Wedding gift for the groom. • Gifts for bride's attendants. • Lodging (if necessary) for out-of-town bridesmaids. The groom (or his family) usually pays for: • Bride’s engagement and wedding rings. © Marriage licence. • Minister’s fee. • Bride’s flowers, including going-away corsage and bouquet (optional, see below). • Boutonnieres for the men of the wedding party. • Corsages for mothers (see below). • Gloves, ties, or ascots for men of the wedding party.

• Wedding gift for the bride. • Complete wedding trip. © Gifts for best man and

ushers. © Hotel accommodations (if any) for out-of-town ushers.