SHABBY IN YOUR SHORTS?

Press, Volume XCVII, Issue 28512, 15 February 1958, Page 16

SHABBY IN YOUR SHORTS?

[By

WHIM WHAM]

. . . was refused service in the lounge of a Queen Street hotel because he was dressed in shorts . . . tailored grey shorts, light shirt and tie and theree-quarter length socks . . Mr W. Macey, manager of the Trans-Tasman, said people wore a very large range of snorts. If dressed carelessly they would not be admitted . . . shorts were definitely not allowed in dining-rooms, said three managers.—Auckland newspaper report.

Admittedly there exists all Sorts And Conditions of Shorts. The common or gardening Pair Tied up with Twine, with a Tear Abaft the Beam?—l don’t care

HOW comfortable they are they won’t do for cocktail Wear And Shorts (says old Fusspot Fashion) just aren’t Worn When even the slightest Bit even decently torn, Except at one of those highly informal Receptions for the self-invited Saturday visitor who finds you turning over the Compost Heap and- won’t go and you can’t change till you’ve had a Bath and after All it IS your own back Lorn. The Pair, you used for Concreting Won’t do for the business Lunch or Board Meeting, Not with all that Cement you wiped off your Hands upon the Seating; And Fashion won’t like it Much if you go to Town in The Pair you painted the Roof and took the Engine down in; Those dear old Grease marks may be all very well In the Privacy of the Home, but will repel The sensitive Management of the 5-star-plus Grand Illusion Hotel—(That PLUS, I am able to inform my Readers by the Way Means they change the Coffee-grounds in the Coffee-stewer every day • Instead of every Week, they filter the Rust Out of the Bathwater, and for a small Surcharge will dust The Bedroom of bona fide Tourists, which Services are not found in Hotels which remain, like their Guests, nonplussed)— But those Shorts, as I was saying, You have to be careful about displaying Your knees and your Ignorance of what is correct. How can you expect The Management to do Anything else but look askance At you in your grubby old Football Pance? Just pull up your Socks you Jokers, and mind You wear only Shorts of the most elegant Kind In the Lounge, and you must not think it hard That Shorts in the Dining-room are absolutely barred: You can drink in them, so long as you look neat in them, But if you think you’re gomg to’ be allowed to EAT in them— There may be Countries where that kind of Thing is rife But we don’t like it in New Zealand, do we, Sir? it’s at Variance with our way of—how shall I put it? Life’