PAH-KAY-HAH MAH-O-REE

Press, Volume LXXXIX, Issue 27203, 21 November 1953, Page 6

PAH-KAY-HAH MAH-O-REE

[By WHIM WHAM I Forty Maori place-names likely to be encountered by 8.8. C. commentators during the Royal tour have been recorded by the N.Z.B.S. and sent to London as a pronunciation guide. No compromise whatsoever has been made with local usage. . . . Waikouaiti and Paraparaumu are two typical cases—the 8.8. C. will use the correct Maori pronunciation “Te-maru,” not “Timm-aru.”—News item.

The Announcer says Pah-rah-pah-row-moo, The Announcer says And I say Parraperamm, I also say Wockertip, Oterhoo, Timmeroo— That’s how consistent I am. I say Hokerticker and Pie-cocker-eeky, A Tiki’s a Ticky (though Some prefer Teeky); I say Tarra-nacky, Tee-pap, Pappanewey; I don’t have much Trouble with Kiwi or Tui, But a Bird I call Weaker (or do I say Wecker?) Is as bad as that Place, Motchu-eeka (or -ecka?). Then I say Wy-t’marta, and not Wy-t’matter, Though local Abusage may favour the Latter. —But the Broadcasting Service is stricter and narrower, With its Tay Ah-ro-hah for what I call Tee-yarrower, With its Tah-rah-nah-kee and its O-hee-nay-moo-too: The Things that a YA Announcer can do to An innocent Place-name we’ve All of us heard; It’s painfully clear, but it isn’t the Word; And Maori and Pah-kay-hah suffer alike The embarrassing Accents addressed to the “Mike.” —The 8.8. C. (Bless its intelligent Heart!) Had better inquire on the Spot for a Start. They’d find that the Rest of us don’t give a Daumu For the Way the Announcers say Paraparaumu; That the usual Way to pronounce Waikouaiti Is by common Acceptance correct and polaiti; And that only Eccentrics consistently cling To the pseudo-authentic, impeccable Thing Called Broadcaster’s Maori . . But What am I SAYING! Enough, I imagine, to earn me a Flaying By racial Purists (poor Sufferers!), who May All go and jump in Lake Wuk-ah-tee-poo.