OBITER DICTA.

Press, Volume LXIV, Issue 19482, 1 December 1928, Page 14

OBITER DICTA.

(By K.)

This is, I believe, the last time these notes will appear—do not start, foolish reader, in alarm or in delight, jumping to conclusions as if you were a Liberal —the last time these no'tes will appear with Sir Joseph Ward in Opposition. By next Saturday, they tell me, Mr Coates will have resigned, and the sum of 70 millions will be distributed on the following Monday morning by the postman, with Sir Joseph's compliments and wishes for a Merry Christmas. Seventy millions is a great sum of money, but when divided up amongst the public, it comes to only about £346 5s per household. All the same, one can buy all one's Christmas presents for that amount and have something over. If the money does not come promptly, questions will be asked, and the Progress League and Chamber of Commerce will surely take the matter up very briskly. If, through any want of a co-operative spirit in the London money-lender, the money is not forthcoming, we must all join in a practical application of the policy of " Uplift without Dogma." Uplift without Dogma "is when" you kick somebody clear through the window without arguing about it. In the meantime we may hope for the best, and if the best happens Sir Joseph will- receive on Christmas Eve 50,000 neckties, 500 gold watches, 20,000 scarf-pins, a shop-full of gold fountain pens, 50,000 turkeys, cigars, handkerchiefs, and everything. We shall all wish to give him a present. The advertisers ought to make a note of this. The New Zealand Alliance, however, will. hardly, notice the Christmas season—which it generally recognises by the slightly stronger scent of brandy—because it will be in the midst of its "plan to win National Prohibition within three years." The local " Area Council" announced this week that this plan is being worked put—a reply to my ill-timed suggestion in last week's notes that the Prohibitionists, had been stunned into a cocoa-coloured speechlessness. There is a Spanish saying: " Hombre pobre todo es trazas" —the poor man is all plans; This is the old saying "Necessity is the mother of,.invention" a little off the key, and I for one shall watch with interest the working of the Prohibitionist .plan to persuade this rumsoaked, Hell-bent nation (these harsh descriptive terms , are taken from the writings of the Dry : Fathers)- to turn right round. One :Of the. Dry Fathers has given ten reasons (the tenth: being the girl who likes her cocktail) why the Prohibitionist cause made such poor progress. You have read them all in paper, and they" need not be;: repeated jhere. But the eleventh reason is probably,, the besU thatVthe : country dislikes Prohibition.. ■ This seems to,be the seascyi for plans. The Scottish Nationalists, it is reported,; have niade' a plan to Taid Westminster; Abbey and forcibly remove the Stone of Destiny from the Coronation Chair; It is easy to understand, if. not to sympathise with, .-'the/; desire! v of. the

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