THIRD CLASS MEN.

Press, Volume LXII, Issue 12483, 20 April 1906, Page 10

THIRD CLASS MEN.

— *- —■ By Scl'mas Macmasls (Author of " Throt-Rh the Turf Smnfcp," &c.) From t&o quitted Rio, tho U.IS.S. Talapoosa had been "tramping" for full throe weeks without once touching land. Tho grog-tub was at zero —and the men's .spirits likewise. The want of fnsh provisions, too, did not 'help to sweeten the temper of tho lower deck. "Which o' yous lx>ys mi ink yer joggraphy, an' can tell a fellow the namo o' this darned hen-o:>op we're runnin' iutil now," Chief-Grumbler Barney queried. "'Del Santos, Barney," I heard Mr Low (v<l y. "The" De'il salt us—an' I wish to the Lord (may Heaven forgive mc!) that he'd not forgot the officers, when lie had his hand in it. For. in throtli, we're pretty well salted and pickled.. The de'il ealt. them that kept us goin' duntin.' about the says o' the wurrul', drivin' to the divil-only-knows-whero (for I'm putty sartint the Captain didn't knonv) cha.sin' our tail roun' tho ocean, without a toothful o' grog, nor a pick o' mat* fit to offer to a chimley sweep, if he wae a Christian for an age gone. Och, may tho de'il salt them ■with all the veins of his heart (Heaven forgive mc!) and hang them up by the taite for corned cod-n.sh. Ach, it's aisy for yous to laugh, boys, I suppose," and Barney Mulhcrn gave them a glance of deep indignation, as ho got up and prepared to leave thorn. "It's aiey for ye to laugh I suppose, but for my part it's small laughin'e the matter with mc, there Hasn't boon a laugh in mo stomach for a fortnight." "All hands bring ship to anchor," the boatswain piped. "It's something to thank the Lord for," Barney said, as they let slip the starboard anchor, "that we'll get a chance of shakin' our legs on dry lan, an' a mouthful o' whatever sort o' poison the haythons drink Jiore." "Take ye care, Barney, that you ain't got to thank the lloomin' Oapting for the liberty first.' "Och, the divil fhank him—an , that'll be thanks enough for him." "He'e not forgotten our last night at Rio yet; you bet." "The Korra care whether or not, sure we'll forget it. Conshumin to him, did he never go on a bit of a harmlese tare himself that he'd go kick up such a ruction for nothin'?" "Wae smashing the Santa Maria bar nothing?" "Confound yo, ye dumbskull! What was that maint for barrin' a bit of fun —all pure fun." "For us, Barney." "Vis, of courpo for us. It's not to r» expected thnt men who go row!in , about the ocean for half a lifetime, hiddin' good jnorra to daTch every other month, shouldn't have a bit of divansion in its proper saison. Hang ye for a lubber!'' "And then the H.-irbonr Watch? Was it for his diversion yon bone-bruised him — fetching down on us all fhe authorities from tlu< Governor to the Scavenger.' "Xow I wifh you'd eliut up your Jigur*' head. That's all very fine, but what right had thy dimmed idiot for to cock up his rascally jaw to mc, an' for to insult mc. He wanted to help mc to :no boat—payed I wasn't able to take care o' mpiself. Faith, I very fsoon showed him it was himself, the darned fosl, wasn't able- to take care of himself. I wonder nip why I didn't knock the sowl-caso out of him an' only it was the mercy o' goodness was over him. he'd a bee-i as dead as he deserved when I finished with him." The U.S.S. Talapoosa was not yet half an hour moored when the word was pat-sod that third-claes man would not

bo allowed on shore at Del Santos —and Barney was on the third-clasn list. There was gnashing of tooth on flio lower deck at this intelligence. •• Thoto lio goes himself, Mveet bad luck to him! an' tho divil «nd that the bottom may be I he first lan he'll rtv.ch." the exasperated Barney said. a« he took a hitch in tho painter of a welcome bumboat. "If he'd brak hi.-) neck on the quay thero'd be. more dhry eyes on the bliip, I'll wager, than he'd bargain tor." It was the captain who'd gone for t>huro in the gig. "Here's clam-jams, tarts, nggenci'ovfi, an' tol-ue-role," Jiarney went on, as*lie hoisted tho bumboat man's basket aboard. " I say, fir, have yo got never a shebeen about yer poekete- , " "Quo dizes? 2son comprendo, Senor." ••Oh, the sorra take yon, an your blamed gibberish! Smo you're not either expect in' Christians to undherstand that? 1 want to know have ye got ere a dhrop o' whi.-koy—ishgo-bagh canva (or whatever the divil ye call it) about ye?' , and Barney helped out his meaning by putting to hit. mouth an imaginary glass, jerking his head very far back, and then smacking his lips. "Have ye got or© a thimbletnl o' that? Don Scoundhrello. 1 ' •' Xenhiun, Senor," with a gesture of sincere regret. " Och then, to the deuce with you, whiskers, an ; your basket o' thrumpery!" Barney in his indignation would have scattered the contents of tho basket with a kick if Don Schoundhrello, as he very impolitely named him, hadn't snatched it out of his way, and removed elsewhere—right heartily abusing Barney over his shoulder as ho went. \ " Aiey now, ye hang-dog lookin' villain ye," Barney replied, " keep a civil tongue in yer jaw, if ye don't want to go inspectiu' the keel—for afore ye'd have time to say 'God blbe ye!' I'd have yo over the side, an' yer box o thricks either ye—l'm in a blias'd timper this minit," he said, turning away, "and I'm afeerd I'll have to aiee it upon feomo wan. Mother o' Moses, but I'd like to have the captain here for just two minnibs. an , get him to throw up his flippers to mo. Ho-o-o!" and Barney went through an imaginary punching match with koen relwh. "Ho-o-pl it'ts Barney Muihern would give him tho purtie'st dhressin' ever he got since ho tirat seen a tailycr! Ho-o-o!"' But Barney had a stone up his eleeve. On Sunday morning, thirteen men, headed by Barney Muihern—all scrupulously cleaned and dres-ed—appeared at tho nia.st, and demanded audience of the Captain. The Captain oamo up and presenteu himself. Barney, as spokesman, stepped forward. "Sir," he said, "we're Catholics, ten or eleven of us," here he indicated country nwn of his own, "Roman Catholics, and these three hero is Jarmin Catholics and we'd feel mightily obliged tor laive to go ashore to attend Mas-*. , ' ''Did I not say that after the conduct at Rio, I wouldn't permit any of you to put foot on shore for three months, except you had to do co on duty?" " Right enough, sir. ye did. I renumber it well. And you'll please remimber, pir, thiftis on duty we're goin' —God's* duty. sir. The commandments say*, sir, as I'm sure ye remimber, 'H-e----mimber you keep holy the Sabbath day —by goin' to Mass." " "It you permitted the performance of your duty to go neck and nock with your knowledge of it,"' tho Captain eaid, ignoring Barney's amended edition of t ho commandment, '• you would be in n lair way to going aloft. Why can't you keep the Sabbath day holy on beard ship?" " Js it keep it holy among that clanjamfry down there?"' and with a wave of his hand he indicated the lower deck.

"Throth, sir, no signs on vc, y© know little about the morals of them, and yo have rait-on to thank God sir, ye don t. Keep it holy down there! Och, Good-nt't-f.. look , to yer innocence." •• Besides." the Captain said, and there was a twinkle in his eye. "Mr Robertson holds service ia an hour."' •• That's right enough, too, sir, an' suits them that suits it: but Mr Robertson an" mc sails by different charts—so wed fall out about the narigatin", for where I'd be savin , there was deep wather, he'd holloa out 'Shoal! Shoal' , We'd better boord different crafts then on Sundays." ■• You're a born logician. lou were never meant for the lower deck, whatever ill-wiud blew you there. It's on the quarter deck you should be permanent lv. ' '• Och. well, as for that, sir, and Barney modestly bent his head—■" as for that, sir, if I do my part—as I tru.sfc in God I sthrive to do—on the lower dock for the wee time we're in this wurrl; I'll Ik? lookiii' forward to a better plase on the quarter-deck in the nixt. Not to be anyways imperent, I iook to be marehiiv It cheek-by-jowl with yotueeU, sir. then.' , "Well, let mo tell yon—you in particular, for you it w;i> who were ringleader —that'if you are looking for a place on the quarter-deck in the other world--you'll have to conduct yourself vii-y niiich more becomingly and moro C'hrietii'.n-like Ihan what you did at 11 io. when you get ashore. 1 don't care to retiu-e you liberty to go to Mass -only, lvmember this, if the liberty yon fret is abused. I'll certainly not hesi- , curtail it on inline occasions. I Now. Sergeant." and the Captain «d----dres-ed him to the Sergeant of Marines on duty, "yon are to give mc an account of how. and when these men return. See you come Iwck in good linn , ,' hot-viid a sain to ]3ariK'y's company, "and make Mire that there Un't a trace of liquor on any of you—a trace, remember. I'll not permit you to disgrace the ship* company." indignantly. '• Which means, boys." said Barney, I who. being now in high gocd humour. eouUl afford to joki—-which means, hoys, tlh-it you're not to laive the shore till every f>6 wl has slep' off his dhrunk. But ov'c-n this interpretation ot the CaptainV> warning they did not observe, for the sergeant ot marine** roporU-d iiarney and hL» thirteen as having come aboard drunk and <ii>ordorly. •■Then." said the Captain, ''there'll be no more going"ashore to Mass—that s tinal. And. Inrthermoro, if they wnd up any more deputations to mc, wij;i that logic-chopping rascal of an Irishman amongst thorn, I'll m the hist place ret use the request, and in the second place consider whether I tluli put him under arrt'hi as a creator ot mischief. Let them know that from me— when they're sobered; and let them — and him—-reineml)cr it well." •• I'll fcediir till him, an' the curse o Cnimmil on him lor the neygar he is," was Barney's comment to his comrades, when this latest order was being de-bate-el imdor the forecastle. " We're a little handful ot Irishmen, an' a i grain o' Jarmins, an' we've get some tatthcrs o : religion about us; an' its email opportunity God sees, we get to practice it. And does that man—the eur.se o' the crows light upon him!— does he think he's goin' to deprive us of the odd wee chance we get ot attendin' the duties of our religion and show in' our respect tor it, goin to Mas,? Upon my faiin, there'll be more nor two words about that ufore he gets off with it. Hoity-toity! We'll, with God's help, hear"Jlw, or know the raison why." The ship was to lie at Del Santos for a few weeks. It was agreed that permVirion to attend Mass on the next Sunday should, in the ordinary coiuvc, be asked; but, it was considered politic —by Barney himself, as well as by the others —that the argumentative Barney should not form one of the deputation. On Saturday evening, a. handful of them hitched their breeches at the mast again. Barney, in punishment for a late offence, was at that moment securing tackle in the starboard-main, rigging under the top. But ho hud his eye on the deputation. When he i;a\v tile Captain approach them, ho hurriedly glanced round the decks to see it he was observed, and then quickly secured '« gcod listening position over the Captain's head, from which he leant an eager ear. "Well, what's the matter now?" the Captain enquired of the deputation. " Sir, the Catholic? of the third-class desire permission to go ashore to Mass, to-morrow." '•'Death, sir, was it not enough for mc to give definito orders that you would not Iks allowed on shore to Mass again F' , and in a rage the Captain stamped upon the deck. " Mass! ay, I know well the Mass you are anxious to attend. It was attending Mass, was it, that left you in the state in which you came altcard )not Sunday? Was that attending Maws, sir?" " Wo considered that as it is so seldom we get the chance of attending Mas;, you wouldn't refuse us permission to do so?" "You sliall not go. Is that sufficient?" Tho Captain, a v-ery passionate man, shook with suppressed rage. "You—shall—not—go! How often must my orders bo repeated. While you're in the ship with mc, third-class men don't leave this on Sunday again.. I'll allow no third-class man ashore to Ma.'s, after " But (suddenly tho Captain's speech was cut short by a voice from above hie head, jiifit as furious as his own:— ■'An' do you think third-class men 3ias got divil si sowl at all to save?" The astounded Captain jumped where he stood. In amazed ire he twisted his body, letting back his head till he got a view aloft, with Barney leant forward theiefiom, tho face of him red with passion. "In throth, an"," Barney continued, "I'll make it mc business to see if that is Congriss's opinion on the matter!" Tho men on the lower deck rapidly disappeared like rabbits into burrows.

Some officers who were on the quarterdeck hurriedly turned away, ran and leant over the side. "Sergeant of Marines!" the Captain roared out in a husky voice, "hold that man under arrest!" Then, fuming, he strode away to his , room, easting furtive glances as he went at these who were leant over the sides, and whoso frames, he. saw, were suspiciously convulsed. On that same evening it wafi, that the Bishop of DeJ Santos with three other priests in hie train, came aboard the Tally. The Captain had cooled sufficiently to receive them graciously, and to entertain them to tea : after which j ho sliowed them over the ship. I When the party arrived on the lower i deck, the Bishop found a big strong j fellow, with a very devout and humble ' look on his countenance, kneeliug before him at the bridge. The Bishop raiMxl I his hand and gave him blessing. Alter awhile he again paesed the bridge, and j found the i>ame man kneeling to him; and. pleased with the gcodnces of the fellow, he bk*sed him once more. Br.t at tho third turn he had to vouchsafe him a third blessing. ''My good man.' , ho kindly asked in English, "what is your name?" "My n<l inc. please your Lordship."' and while lie «poke fingering the band of tlie cap which he held in his hands, "is Barney Miilheni, from tho County Tyrone. I belong to the Barony of Camlarrigan. an' Father Pother Dogherty—maybe your Lordship hat* heard tell'of him—is mc panVh prie;-t—the graco o' God be about him wherever ho goes, for it's him was the pious, good man, that leathered tho catcc'iiism into me—which is the rniV-on why I've got :t .«o well. But I wdbn't much more nor a gossoon, your Lordship, when I sei-n the last of Tyrone an' ould Ireland (may God's hles-sin , hang over them now an' always)! I come awny to Amrriky with mc mother's bWsin , an' mc religion, an' a. brcakin' heart ,nn' a mortial small purse, ycur Lordship; an" through hardships an' misery I've always strivrd to koop tho fii'M. two about me—an' with God'e help I'll not lot go of them aisy. An , ye <=oe mc now a presner." "A pri;onei-, good fellow! And for what?" "Just, mc Lord, for bein' too fond o' mo religion. ,, '•Which religion, my Lord, ,, tho Captain here explained to the astonished prelate, "is in this awe the whisky jar —or its South Amorican equivalent." Here the Captain led the Bishop aside whilst he explained to him Barney's delinquencies, and tho conduct of the thircircliisis men, who had gone ashore ostensibly to attend Mass. Which, when ho heard, the good man came back to admonish Barney. "Vis mo Lord," Barney consented with engaging frankness, "tho Captain haifii't sayed a word but true. Wo did get overcome, I admit; an' the Captain 'hiimself wasn't wan whit madder about it than 1 was moeelf when I come to meself. Ye eco, mc Lord, afther wo went to chapel an' Jiccrd Maas, nn' offered up some wee toothfuls of prayers for privato purposes, wo got undher way for the quays, all in good ordher, an 'with a clean bill, an' we sayed we'd mind the Captain's warnin' and not shorten sail till we hauled up aboard again; an , Morris Curneen (he's a Cork man from the Cove; ye'vo heerd tell of the Cove of Cork, of course)— Morris, ho eay«*d it was a good resolution, iui' that we'd just step intil a public-houie to thrait ourselves, for intendin' so well; an. in we wont. Woll, ye see, your Lordship, any little dhrinic wo were ever given to was a dlilop of rale o\yl IritJi whiskey (same as the Pope, himself, I'm tould—God bliss him an' save him an' spare him long till us!—samo as he himself, I'm tould, must have a tumbler of, to his dinner every day—an' more be the samo token, if 1 might take the liberty to say so, if your Lordship would only try tho same rcsipuy for wanst, ye'd niver bo induced to give it up again)—we were only used, 1 say, to mild ould Irish whiskey, en' were noways aware of the raecally fineness of the poison they pass on an innocent man for sperrits in this country. Moreover nor that, we were off from lan , for three weeks afore, an , our provisions, to say tho laste, was neither plenty nor good—so we weren't in condition (if we'd only known it) to stand liquor, barrin' it was mild Irish liquor. So, your Lordship tees the rest o t it—thirt rascally canya (savin' your Lordship's presence) near u'lncsl turned us.inside out, an' took us bo the head besides, afore we had time to bliss ourselves. An , I needn't tell your Lordship, for ye know well, when tho liquor flies to a* man's head, it makes short work o' the resolutions ho had stowed away there. So ye see our biggest fault was our innocence—we. didn't know that rascality was misured out to ye in this country be the glass, an' you made to pay s:iss for it. But, upon my word, I'll be scratch in' a grey head (with th« Lord's lielp) afore I'm made such a fool of again—an' there isn't a man of the batch but is of the wan with mc oonsarnin' the ranie thing. So there-s the whole thruth now to your Lordship, as plain -as Barney Mulh«-rn can put it. An' then when 1 heard the Captain refusing them poor Catholics laivo to hear their Mass on the Lord's Day, the Irishman came up in mc, an' spaik out mc mind there an , then I had to do if I was to swing for it the next minnit. I'm a, pres'ner now. but I don't complain. It's a small .thing to suffer for mc religion, an' there's many a better man than Barney Mnlhern suffered more. If your Lordship wouldn t mind givin' mc 'another blissin'—for it isn t every day Mnnis kills a bull—-HI feel I a happier man nor the Admiral. l»cd .strengthen your arm, an prosper whatBomiver yo put a ban' to. Amen! On the following Saturday evening, there was jubilation in the lower deck, and Barney Mulhern, lifted upon broad shoulders, 'was borne round at a ranter to revive the plaudits of the multitude, as bein" the means of enfranchising tiiiid-da-s men. For the word had been piuwd that, by special favour to the Bishop of Del Santos, all Catholics, whether Roman or Jarnnn, amongst them, were at liberty, under pledge of good conduct, to hear Mass on shore next morning.