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Bay of Plenty Times, Volume LXV, Issue 12390, 30 July 1937, Page 2 (Supplement)

Levy turned up wearing a diamond tie-pin. His friends were impressed, and one asked him: “I say. Levy, where did you get that diamond?” “You remember Stein?” “Yes, but he didn’t leave you any money, did he?” “No, but he left a hundred pounds for a memorial stone to be put up to him. This is it.” * * * On his return home from a fortnight’s absence, Sandy explained that he had been on holiday in London. “Mon,” commented Jock, “what awfu’ extravagance! Had ye no seen London once already?” “Ay, but I had an invitation. I only spent eight and saxpence altogether.” ‘What, ye were invited and yet . ye spent eight and saxpence! Whatever on?” “Oh, on bits o’, presents and fares and postcards and tips. But maistly on women.” * * * A DRY 19TH A section of Willoughby (N.S. Wales) Council opposes a suggestion that igolfefs on the Northbridge links should be permitted to celebrate at the “19th hole.” Even outside the Council Hall opinion on this poignant subject is divided. A Scottish golfer, asked how he would approach a bony-dry 19th hole, said: “Ah would foozle it, Mr .Persnurkus, an’ withdraw frae the game feelin’ sair cast doon. But Ah hae no seen sic a barbarous gowf links, an’ Ah’m hopin’ All’ll no live tae see it.”. ■ Dr. Martin, when Peter asked about the possible psychological effect of such a restriction on the same, said: “Subconscious memory of the bunker yawning at the end of the course, might have a dire effect on a man’s golf. The sense of frustration and limitation approaching the Nineteenth might give rise to an ineradicable inferiority complex in the presence of all water hazards. This might impel the golfer to forsake golf and take up croquet, snakes-and-ladders, ‘selling horses’ or even S.P. betting.” Mr Weary Willie contented himself with the observation: “I could not think of a better cure for the golf habit, could you?”