CRITICISM CORNER

Auckland Star, Volume LXXV, Issue 153, 30 June 1944, Page 3

CRITICISM CORNER

Betty Hales: Your story, "All Because the Clock Stopped," was not unusual enough for publication, I'm afraid, Betty. That particular plot, dealing with money which is found in an old clock (sometimes it's in a box or trunk) has been used so often, both by people in the past and children like yourself, that it is not interesting any more. Next time try and think of something original—something which strikes you yourself as being rather different from other plots. Note the type of stories we publish. Also, watch your punctuation. Sometimes you run sentences together without capitals, commas or quotation marks. Kather'ne Howarn: Your description of an air raid was quite well written. Katherine, but the London blitz and the people's heroism have been the subject of so many stories, novels, newspaper accounts and pictures on the screen that anything written on the subject now must be outstanding to win interest. Try and work out a more original plot next time. Maire Taua: Tiie idea of your "Noises in the Dark" turning out to be the branches of a tree tapping the window has often been used before in stories of the "ghost" tvpe. Maire. and we suggest you attempt a more original plot next time. Also, be careful of little mistakes, such as writing "quite" for "quiet" and instead" in place of "inside." Melba Sweeney: The ending of your story, "Mrs. Hen and Mrs. Duck, seems flat "and disappointing. It would have made a better tale if, after the quarrel, thev had made friends again. For instance, while the feathers were Mr=:. Duck could have noticed that the hen family's cackling was like laughter and that could have set them laughing, and nens could have seen the funny side then and joined in. Only a suggestion, but it may help you to'see what we mean. Take a little more care with the actual writing, enlarge your vocabulary and try again.

JOKES

Arriving home from school one day, Bobbie remarked to his mother: "X met a poor boy coming home from school who had never heard of ice cream." "Indeed! And what did you say to him?" asked his mother. "I said I'd nearly forgotten it myself.

A cyclist approached a small boy who was very solemnly fishing. "How many have you caught?" he asked. "Well, when I've got another I shall have one," was the reply.

Tourist: You have an unusually large area of corn under cultivation. Don't the birds annoy you a great deal?" Farmer: Oh. not much. Tourist: That's peculiar considering you have no scarecrows. Farmer: Oh, well, you see, I'm out here a good part of the time myself. —From Jennifer Mason, Grey Lynn.