THESE LITTLE POLITENESSES

Auckland Star, Volume LXXI, Issue 159, 6 July 1940, Page 2 (Supplement)

THESE LITTLE POLITENESSES

ByCyrano

THE other day a county councillor objected to the county engineer signing letters to him as "Yours obediently," when he (the engineer) was "far from that." "Yours obediently," the councillor added, was more in order when a wife was writing to a husband. The addition suggests that there wasn't much feeling behind the protest, for who ever heard of a wife signing herself so, in these days at any rate? "Love, honour and obey" has become Love, honour and reasonably obey."

In t lie laughter that followed the engineer said that in future he would i>e "your< faithfully. ' It is a safer subscription and much inure common, obediently - ' takes me back to the days when we wrote specimen letters at school. 1 ha \ cut seen it f< >r aires. "Yours faithfully"' sponw to be the rule in all formal letters these days. It is polite and non-committal. It would be too much to expect that "sincerelv" was always sincere, but "faithfully" may be reasonably interpreted as such. I here are, of course, more formal stvlee 'if suliscription. "[ have the honour to be your Lordship's humble servant," or if you want to make it a little more certain, you might say "humble and devoted servant." There is the delightful Irench style: "Accept. sir. the assurance of my deepest regard" or some. Mich words, which almost makes you want to frame the letter. Expressions of humility, however, are much less common than they weie. Shelley, while still at Eton, addressing- a firm of publishers about a romance he was writing, signed himself, "Your very humble servant." There wasn't anything verv humble about Shelley in such matters; he followed the custom of the time.

Gradations of Feeling It is worth noting, too, that S'hellev lx>gan li is letter, "Gentlemen." There is as much interest in styles of letter address a* in styles of departure. The

transition from "Dear Mr. Brown," through "Dear George" to '"Dearest" is romance reduced to its briefest possible summary, but sometimes, alas, the wheel is reversed, and we come back to '"Dear Mr. Brown, 7 ' and oven to "Dear sir." Such changes, of course, are not confined to lovers. In our own. history Si: George i J rev and General Cameron, who commanded the troops in the Maori War began by addressing each other as "My dear Sir Georg-e" and "My dear General," but sank into such bitterness, that the Governor's secretary returned a lette: from the general with the. request tha: it l>c ''put into more usual and becomin; langiia L'e."' But, to return to Shelley, "Gentlemen-' is an admirable owning. It is complimentary, without committing one to anything, and it is spacious. I never hoard of anyone beginning a letter ''Blokes."' but I feel sure Australia or New Zealand must have furnished an example. There are gradations of feeling ir. these things. '-Dear sir"' is neutral, but I must confess to feeling slightly irritated when I am so addressed by firms and institutions who know me. There is something unnecessarily cold and distant alxuit it. On the other hand, if you pet a letter from a stranger beginning "My dear sir," you take notice. The "My" makes a lot of difference. The fellow is showing some interest in you. I have found letters l>eginning "My dear sir" exceptionally interesting. "Sir" by itself is ominous, and you can easily test how much scorn and contempt can be got into the spoken word. Dr. Johnson owed much of his authority to its use. Rut it can be purely formal. -'Sir,'' reported a British captain to his admiral, "We have taken and destroyed all the Spanish ships and vessels which were upon th% coast; the number as per margin. I am, etc., G. Walton." A man of a few words, this captain. The "etc." shows that. An abominable word, "etc.," which should be denied about 90 per

cent of its use. Nothing U mar* in prose than the appearane® of!!!; shop-soiled tag.

In subscriptions you must have nntwj the difference between "Yours and "Sincerely yours." The step forward in intimacy and trust U,* haps you feel a little glow when get it. The contraction to Totju^ 5 generally a sign of closer tie*, wjj -who are good and tried friends dispense with anything of the simply sign their names or initial* 1 *

Sound Convention There is a convention in these flm. and a sound one. I recall a little iae^r 1 in Seddon's day, when the social lesS?' tion of the Liberal Government some people to fury. At a meeting city chamber of commerce, it w*j ' posed that Mr. Seddon be "respectfcjt requested" to do eo and-so, vhereir&f a member protested with some heat tV Mr. Seddon should not be requested to do anything. Xo many other members shared hig of Seddon politics, but the meeting ] believe, decided to stick to the fonn 0 f politeness. It's like that with You may think a man a scoundrel, w that doesn't prevent you from addiwf in? him as "Dear sir," and it shouldn't Periodically there are proposals, of which I understand have been net into effect, that all such politest should be jettisoned as waste of times*,! energy. They miprht be answered wjtt the story of the New York business nan who took a Chinese visitor home to dinner. The host rushed his guest fro® his office by two or three methods of locomotion, and as he reached his doo; exclaimed triumphantly, "There! Wrtj saved five minutes." "Yes?'' replied tie Chinese, "and what are we going to d 0 with it?" What are -we going to do witl the seconds pained by dropping "Dy, sirs" and "Yours faithfully??" sm e more money? It has even been srp»4 that there is no need for a customer or a shop assistant to exchange "Thank yous." They have conducted a pure bmi. ness transaction, about which then is no obligation. Well, well. These little courtcsies sweeten life, and he»Tea knows life just now. of all times, need; all the sweetening it can get.