THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXX, Issue 101, 2 May 1939, Page 8

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MEN ABOUT TOWN.)

"F.H.V par. concerning Japanese whisky "bottled at Buckingham Palace" reminds me that I once tasted vodka. Fortunately it wae _„ once only. When I first THAT'S THE saw the liquid I thought SPIRIT, it was benzine, but when

I had tasted it—well, I wished it had been. Russia, of course, produces benzine, but possibly they get j t mixed with the vodka sometimes. This may explain why many motorists prefer the Russian product. They are doubtless hopeful of obtaining more .revolutions to the minute.— 8.0. H.

After a long, dry sojourn in the bueh somewhere in the King Conntrv (that "dry" area south of Hamilton), Jack,\Sam and Bill decided to spend a holidav BUSH SICKNESS, among the bright lights. Jack and Sam put up at. we'll say, the Hotel Superb, while Bill was forced to seek a nest at the Magnificent. The holiday became a trifle extended, a* eueh holidays have a habit of doing, and after about a week tilings were onlv middling. Early one morning Sam decided to pay a visit to Bill. He returned looking grave. In response to Jack's inqury, he said: "Gosh, poor old Bills crook." "What's the matter with him?" inquired Jack. "Well, when I asked how he was he said 'O.K.' But when I asked if he could see any turkeys with white straw hat* on he couldn't." "Well," quoth Jack, "what's the- matter with that?" "Matter," echoed Sam; "why. blimev, the room wae full of them."—D.W.F.

Few regimente have so intrigued the public fancy as the famous Black Watch, and it w> open to argument whether any other rejriment has the same BLACK WATCH, record of performance, of unflinching loyalty, devotion to and conception of dutv as'they, gallant Hieland laddies. Their name, in fiction and fact, has spread around the whole globe, honoured as much in enemy countries as In their own native Caledonia'. Yet, when we look back upon their origin, we find that, despite the wonderful promises made to the first Scots to enlist therein, they had much to contend with, much reason to complain— and solid "rounds to doubt the word of the Government that called them into being. When the crucial test came, however, when the England with whom, by a once-hated Act of Union, their Scotland was united was faced by powerful foes, we find them in the forefront of battle—and for two hundred and twenty years "am Freiceadan Dubh," "the Black Watch" (a nickname given to distinguish them from the Saighdearan Dearg. or '•the Red Soldiers" of England) the history of this Scottish regiment is woven into the history of our own Empire so closely that our history books are but a continuous*record of the achievements of the Black Watch. Originally a mere handful of Highlanders loyal to tlie Union, the Black Watch was composed of z>2s volunteers, formed into six companies, in the. year 172f1. Stationed in various parts of tlie Highlands, they were entrusted with the carrying out of the hated Disarming Act —as well as the chocking of riots, f»eor«re TI.. seeing vast possibilities in these lads, and being plentifully occupied with foreign wars, added four more companies in 1739 and incorporated them into a regiment of the line. They were ordered to march to London "to l>e inspected by the King," and found that same King had notions of his. own. They were ordered to embark for Flanders. Instead, unknown to their officers, they came to a decision to march back to Scotland. Overtaken en route, they offered battle. They were cajoled into surrendering by clever diplomacy —and three of their leaders were shot at the Tower and the remainder drafted to the West Indies and Flanders. The treachery of those beginnings forgotten, the men of 'the Black Watch to-day—and in the two centuriee between—have given practical proof unlimited of their devotion to duty—to an ideal—service to the Empire of which they are proud to belong.—MacClure.

The natives of the island of Yap (an evpressive word in colloquial English) liave some curious and amusing customs. Yap is an island of Mieronesin, ISLE OF YAP. north of the Carolines, and close to the equator. being one of the thousand odd inland* over which Japan has a mandate that incidentally looks like being virtual ownership. The cheerful Kanaka inhabitant* have evolved a "reciprocation"' dance. One village will send its young people to dance a "reoiiest' , fur .-< canoe which they covet. Tin- village before whom they dunce have no option; they must deliver the goods. It soon retuniK the compliment, however, and perhaps dances for a. certain piece of money. Their cash is of stone and i-; both heavy and outsize. If they are cute enough to know what "coin" the village |mws«wsiv> they ask for the lot. All must then lie given up; native etiquette so decrees, and any other course would l>e bad eportsmaiwhip. And so the merry game goes on. Tln« interpretive dance substitutes drama, art hii:l literature in Yapland, as they have neither book* nor the printed word as we know it; they just express themselves in. the figures of the dance. They also have a comfortable habit of sitting down as a mark of respect. In German days, the king offended the Governor's idea of good behaviour and lie was. summoned to the Governor's office for reprimand. On the entry of the king, his Excellency rose to greet His Majesty of Balabat, and the king promptly sat down in his chair, leaving H.E. standing. The Governor, unlike some of bis compatriots, I am told, had a sonse of humour and roared with laughter. He had intended punishing Balabat, but hi* sense of the ridiculous won the day. The men of Yap have a sort of club room called Ihe '"All Men-house' , that is used exclusively by the men for social purposes, and no native woman may enter, but. curiously enough, a visiting white man and his wife are invited to use it as their hotel. The Kanakas of Yap, notwithstanding the absence of books and newspaper*, are not without intelligence and culture.— J. WAV.

NOT UNDERSTOOD. • (Apolojjios to Tom Bracken.) Not understood, they're pulled one by one ;i sunder: Their saps arrow wider, as the seasons creep along the years: They heal, and then we wonder why teeth are teeth! And then—we have more made! Not understood! Not understood. he takes our false impressions. And husrs them closelr till the denture's made: Till the false ones seem to us —transgressions! And so, the top ones fall, the lower stay— Not understood! Not understood, how eatinsr often balks them. The thoughtless bread crust, or the fancied tripe. i Destroy their balance—and estranse them! And on the maker there falls a cursinc blijjht— I Not understood! ■ ] Not understood, the secret art of make, of making. ' That's lost beneath the surface and the showis disregarded: With self-satisfaction —we judsre our dentist: And he often eroes— Xot understood! Not understood, oh. Ood! That teeth would be a little "fitter ,, ! Or hurt less harshly where they do not fit - ; Oh. God! That man and dentist Would -'draw ,, a little nearer to each other— Theyd be nearer to Thee— And understood. ! —GUMIHGGER. I