Those Typographical Errors!

Auckland Star, Volume LXX, Issue 99, 29 April 1939, Page 2 (Supplement)

Those Typographical Errors!

I W I By An Editor

0 WHENEVER a mistake, however trifling it may be, occurs |n a newspaper or periodical, as sure as eggs" someone with time to waste will write to the editor, in a gloating or super-critical vein, to direct his attention to the error. I know, for 1 have "had some!" I do not suppose that there is n writer who, if he writes much, docs not at some time trip in fact, grammar, in punctuation, in syntax, or in other WA y*S without receiving correcting letters. Even if the printer commits a spelling error the same attitude is adopted by readers, who appear to delight in spotting mistakes and commenting upon the laxity or ignorance responsible for such slips. I felt impelled to write thus when I noticed a delightful "howler" in print— a "howler" for which there is ni»t, in my opinion, an atom of excuse. A ehureh festival was reported in a country paper, which informed its readers that the altar was "decked with harem lilies, the emblem of puritv"! A country weekly is not rushed as daily newspapers arc. so that the excuse of lack of time cannot be advanced. But, there, I am not one to gloat oyer the failures of others, when, at times, t, have been guilty of slips which, although not so glaring as that I have noticed, have so exasperated me that I could have kicked myself, as a common saying runs. There is so much humour in some mistakes in print that I feel tempted to quote a number for the edification of

m,v readers, who. in the light of international and national worries, need to have their reading enlivened. In a country weekly there appeared a slip which greatly annoyed a. reverend gentleman, who stormed at the editor: < "Your compositors are grossly incompetent.' "Indeed!" exclaimed the editor, "What have they done?" "Why, in your report of a sermon by me tlie word •reverend' appears I don't know how many times, and each time the word ' is mispelled "neverend.' " ! Commenting upon the death of a ladv resident, the editor of a small town paper remarked that: "It is feared that ' her husband will not lie able to bear her demise." That which appeared in • print was: "It is feared that her husband will not be able to wear her ' chemise"! Here is a number of other "howlers" I have collected: . "Dig the ground over thoroughly and then pant."- (iardening periodical. "Only a handful of people in the stands saw the start of the game, but they were full after lunch."—-Australian paper. "It is scandalous to see these societv women going about with a poodle dog at the end of a string, where a babv would be more fitting."—New Zealand paper. "The marriage was a very quiet a affair and was unattended by bridesmaids or bridegrooms."—lrish "paper. "On the 28th inst., to Mr. and Mrs: -, a bony daughter."—South African paper.

I lie ill ! ificiiil sunlight business, T am <■•1(1, is jr< >i vi'iv well. One of the advantages Mill he that we jieed no longer go out. We can sit by the fire with a book in the glare of our own son."—Daily paper. "Mrs. is so much prostrated bv the death of her husband that it is loiibtful whether she will survive him."' —Xewspa per. hat humour, too, there is in public notices! Jn my collection, compiled year '.v year. I have the following samples >f church notices. A "Wayside Pulpit" nitside one church one week ran: 'Make your worst enemy your best ■fiend." The following week this ippcared: "Your worst enemy is drink." A poster outside a Nonconformist ■hurch: Next Sunday's subject: The Truth about the Liquor Traffic." Anthem: "O, Taste and See." Vkin was this: Subject: "Prepare for the Worst." The Choir Will Sing. Again: Subject: "Reasons for Xot (Joing to Church." The Choir Will Sing an Anthem. Collection. An American church displayed this nnouncement: The Kev. will preach on "Is the Financial Depression Disappearing?" Mrs. will sin?, "Search Me."

♦ The admonition. "Do l»e careful!" cannot lie more strongly emphasised than l>,v the ([notation of a notice which appeared outside a Bristol church: Evening subject: "The End of the ' World." Special music. Social hour afterwards. All welcome. All seats free. Not very helpful could this church poster have been to readers as they passed by: "Don t let what you don't know upset what you tjo know." That will give you something to puzzle over! Amusing slips are also to be found in parish magazines, the amateur editors of which are the incumbents. In close proximity in his periodical one vicar placed these two notices: "Y\ e welcome the advent of Dr. — into our village: we have never had a resident doctor before." - "The vicar and church council are considering the extension of the churchyard." Not a happy introduction for the medico, you will agree. A young and timid curate must have been responsible for this paragraph: "On Thursday, Cod willing, there will be a mothers' meeting at 5 p.m. On I-1 iday, <»od witling, and the weather permitting, we will hold the church committee meeting at 7 p.m. On Saturday, in any case, there will be the usual choir practice at 0 p.m." Holidaying in Italy, a parson wrote for his parish magazine this paragraph: "I am sitting at my window in Venice, overlooking the Grand Canal, drinking it all in. Life lias never seemed so full before." Finally, this intimation in print: "The preachers for Advent will be found hanging in the porch."