THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXX, Issue 15, 19 January 1939, Page 10

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MEN ABOUT TOWN.) The etory goes, and there probably ien't a veetige of truth in it, that a certain vicar was somewhat perturbed at what he visualised as a possible future for ON THE THONE. one of his flock. She wae the particular black ewe of the flappers in the village, and with the young men was an odds-on favourite in the popularity stakes. From whisperings he had heard he gathered ebe was going downhill in top gear with all brakes off, and then one day. her parents, called upon him to "do something." It wag two days later when the vicar met her in the street. "Do you know, Mies Jonee," he said, "I prayed for a whole hour fipjFylJil Wut' nijht t" ' "Now did you, vicar? How eilly of you. Why didn't you rfajgline' I am on the 'photoet* , —• ijtyhnny. ' ,; What's all this talk about stopping imports, anyway? The Government ha* juet ordered £350,000 worth of engines and other machinery from overseas. COME INSIDE. It is for our railways. i' Perhaps they will not grant themselves a full permit, but ae a gesture of good faith to the public will cut themselves down to, say, £5 worth. This should buy a new engine for the thundering Xorth Auckland express. Candidly, I cannot understand thie importing business, and can only assume that in railway matters one is expected to read between the lines. To give the Government it* due, however, we muet admit that it showed wonderful foresight in obtaining the services of the newly-arrived party of doctors for our mental institutions, for one feels that such service* will be not only appreciated but urgently required.— B.C.H. That erudite scholar, Macaulay's schoolboy, knows the touching etory of Paley Vollaire of Bromptonville, but for those who do not pretend to the BOYS' PRANK, attainments of that precocious youth we may state that the Gilbertian stanzas record the confession of Paley Vollaire that, when a baby, he took the child of a wealthy man out of its cradle and got in himself. Then, having grown old and squandered his misgotten wealth, he confeseee his misdeed, restores the rightful owner tp his station in life, and takes the savinge of hie thrifty victim, thus enabling him to regain his health by a trip to "Madeira's iele." History does not record whether certain boys, of the Hauraki Plains were inspired by the feats of Paley Vollaire, or whether they were revealing an original taste for mischief innate in most boys. It was at a meeting for women, and those who had brought babies left them soundly sleeping in their baskets, which were placed in an anteroom. While the women were busily engaged in guessing the number of beans in a bottle or indulging in like diversions incidental to such a meeting in the country, the impish lade outside shuffled the babies about in the baskets. At the conclusion of the meeting the mothers collected their respective baskets and went off home. Maternal perception wae keener than that displayed in the Gilbertian' ballad, the prank was soon discovered on arrival home, and, after some little excitement, an adjustment was made amongst the various families concerned.—J.O.H.

Feeble and I had spent the morning at Whakarewarewa, and, amid the rumblings and gurglings of that weird valley, we had met Patrick Murphy, who, PERHAPS! juet ten minutes out from the Emerald Isle, had, he told Uβ. already lodged his application for a job in the "force." "Whaka" had been both. a revelation and a ehock to: him. Ireland, with all ite witchery,' its holy welle, Blarney Stone, Giant's Causeway, its cromlechs, Celtic carving, cairne, round towers and banshees, had nothing at all like thie to offer the tourist. "Ngatiroirangi was one of the first Maori chiefs to arrive here from Hawaiki," I explained. "And one day he and his mate, Ngauruhoe, climbed to the mountain top to get a better view of thie district, but they found the air a trifle too chilly, eo the old boy called out to hie skter, at White Island, to send them some of the fire they'd brought from Hawaiki with them (they'd two canoes full—there was no import ban then), and elte sent it direct along an almoet straight line, south-west, through a subterranean passage, but it came too late to eave Ngauruhoe, who'd, frozen te death. All these hot springe and fumeroles indicate the route the fire 'followed. Ngatiroirangi named the highest peak hereabouts Xijrauruhoe in memory of hie mate, and in ite crater you can still see some of the original fire." Our Irieh friend was silent. "And the Maoris, you eay, came from V "They were evicted from Ireland many thousands of years ago. The Arawae here, for instance, were originally O'Haras." "I suspkted it," he said. "And it'e dinky-diet" asked Feeble. "Shure," I eaid.—MacClure.

Much concern k being Blown across the Tasnian touching the how and the where suitable residence is to be provided the Duke and Duchess of Kent durTHE RESIDENCE, in? their sojourn in Australia. Thie has led to interesting information showing how Sydney •pro.vided a home for the Governor -General. It was in December. 1935, that the New South Wales Government offered the Commonwealth the fee simple of Admiralty House, which overlooks the harbour from Kirribilli. It had been the home, in turn, of eleven admirals of the Royal Navy. The late Lord Kitchener was a gueet there in 1913, and in its day the place had seen some of Sydney'* gayest and smartest social occasions. There is a legend that.the first owner of the Admiralty House site bartered it for a couple of kege of rum. It mav be true, for queer things happened in the past beside Sydney Harbour. Early records ehow that a grant of some 120 acres, including thk star site of the waterfront, was made to one Robert Ryan, some time of the Marines and of the New South Wales Corps. Ryan quickly sold his prize to a merchant known as "Campbell of the Wharf" for a few pounds. After that it changed hands several times. Portion of the site went for £700 to Lieut.-Colonel Gibbes, who built a home called "Wotonga." This was acquired from him in 1885 by the New South Wales Government, and extended to form a residence for the first admiral of the Australian station—RearAdmiral Sir George Tryon. The cedar skirting ' boards in Admiralty House are almost a century old, and the ceflinge of the rooms were obviously built to accommodate giants. —Johnny.

A SIGH FOR SUMMER. While eastern Australia swelters And watches the"tneTcury rise. New Zealand still gloomily shelters Beneath rather dubious skies: For while by the Aussies some sessions Of much-needed rain would be blessed. A series of widespread depressions Keeps coming to us from the west. The morning breaks sparkling: and sunny We leave our umbrellas at home: The weather clerk tries to be funny. And lad'es out rain on. our dome: Or else from an' overcast morning That sends us forth beavilv clad. The sun blossoms forth without warning?. And we once again have been had. Although we'd not like, altogether, A hundred and ten in the shade. A little Australian weather , Might help out the balance of trade; * So, it you can work some correction In our rather dubious clime, I'd like, if you have no objection, A< least one fine day at a time. —SINBAD.