THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXIX, Issue 224, 22 September 1938, Page 10

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MEW ABOUT TOWN.) J Hd«. R. G. Casey, in addressing the Victorian Institute of Advertising, told the following story: A young advertising and : :'■"■■':■'■■ publicity expert got marWATCH ried and began to disprove THIS SPACE, the old fallacy that two could live as cheaply a* one. When,in due course, his income tax assessment form had to be filled in. he joyfully, entered £50 as "deduction claimed in I respect of spouse." He thousfht it nas » great I idea, though he had never called his wife that jbefore. Then he came to the section marked "Deductions Claimed in Respect of Children." Not so easy, but an inspiration came, and he wrote across the section "Watch this space,"— E.S. . . A Devbnnort reader asks for a note on the word "self-help." What he desires is not verjr clear. -In the United States self-help ,-■■ ; _.. - stores are places where SELF-HELP. yon heln yourself from shelves ir* the 6hop and have your purchase, valued as you go out at a turnstile. If that idea has arrived in Xew Zealand it has not come to "Touchstone's" notice. The word "self-help" is supposed to have been coined by Carlvle \in "Sartor Resartus." Samuel Smiles adopted it Jn 1800 as the title of a book. The word "self" is almost superfluous in words like self-^on'•cited jand self-pride. However, in self-willed and self-conseious it lies a definite meaning. The i self-conscious idea has been extended to words like class-conscious and camera-conscious. Other modern compounds include camera-shy, air-minded, and so on. "Touchstone" writes: An inquiry by a I reader as to the meaning of "calorie" is another reminder of the constant inflow of new words, some national NEW WORDS, and some international. Calorie has been in use for very many years to describe a unit of heat. A recent scientific publication says that a large calorie is the amount of heat required to rake the temperature of 1000 c.c. of water byone degree c. To produce energy, the body must have heat, and the food is sometimes described in terms of calories, the units of heat it can give rise to in the body. Sometimes the meaning of a coined scientific word will change entirely with the years. An to-day is one of the little centres of electfieitv that, scientists believe make up material things; but in very old dictionaries it is given as "the same as electrum (German silver}." Protons and nhotons are to be found in scientific books, but not so often in dictionaries. The Auckland Suburban Local Bodies' Association has decided upon launching a war on rats, but unless those in charge of the attack are careful the LISTENING-IN. campaign has everv chance -of being a washout. I happened to be present at the meeting of the One Tree Hill Borough Council last evening, and, strangely enough, just as the council came to an item on the order paper l in which the A.S.L.B.A. asked for • contributton of £3 7/6 towards the purchase of l rat poison, a mouse emerged from behind the I desk of the engineer and squatted in a position | where he could hear everything. The council I decided to donate the £3 7/6. whereupon I mousie (to quote the Westfiehi stock reports, he was "extra prime quality") scuttled out through the doorway into the passage. If that mouse understands even a smattering of English he will be first with the news to-day among the mouse and rat fraternity in On» Tree Hill. Either that or he will be hitting out for the wide open spaces where men and poison are not.—Johnny.

An honest, truthful friend of mine told me this one. "I paid mv fi rs t visit to Christchurch some months ago. One evening I was _-_-. __ __ _ standing on the kerb when UAKV TO BEAT, a policeman approached. __«* t ml . "Excuse me." said he politely, "but are you a resident of thie city?" I replied, somewhat mystified at his \.*" * vißitor trom Auckland." &Mi I thought so!" said the, man in blue with a» obvious air of relief. «Xow, I don't want you to think I am mad or drunk, but can you-he hesitated—can you show me the way to the police station?" I must say that I etared and scratched my head eo vehemently that my "hard-knocker" fell off. "No, I'm afraid I can't" was my answer. "Would you be a sport then and ask one of those shop«fne£r*whT e ? treated . **«"* "YouHl understand that I simply cant do it myself. The fact is, I have only arrived in Christchuwh this evening and forthwith was sent out on tins damned beat- A wave of pity swept and obtained the necessary directions. A* the said, But what would have happened if Von to-n phtT- "Quite easy," said he brightly; "I would simply can a taxi."—B.C.H.

«t Si 7 ****** » quarter-yard of material Wg store. The salesman consulted a brother weap ** teßm *n. apparently eou«*AK ENOUGH cerning the abstruse ealthe.v »».„-. j Nation. They knitted their brows, and pursed their ling and ylut r nfJv? y i° nt^^ ob, * ln - "St«HJ young man No. 1 graaped his pencil firmly and produced their joint solution as fofloSf oS quarter yard at 12/11 equals 3/4! Young man Sb&S N« hS ? WET 1 the Utmost politeness No. 1 handed us the invoice (as the inVoW J y h * j ° ke ' We *"*' and ha ™ «teJ?XI !# j W V™ m *™e as to the standard of education exacted by the bio- firms hut visualise much room for improvementfn the simplest arithmetic. We «S fcT • 2 hTviZ'a ffITJ V, C !J tu, 7 *&° ™ were wlriSonf^.^ 01 ! hft ***** attendant E.«VhT' ,t a mental effort as to oa«s\ but omitted NEW FOUND CAUTION. «»«lfT!L to _ii Ve a brain like Mr Nash's— io C rac Wl e t 1 n d D , e S !L, O ' «*» «nancial ,skin f is aldlS/ rßUad,nsr that the country he i° foot * h « bi »- To Prove thVtTw!i.t„ A F tuarya fibres crash * ■• Mlcke^B scheme can never And aoM£r far W,Ber than the "*•« That oodmlsttc man. our Mr. Nash o'f ,, c^Pp te haPPy - h * ,s * 5*155?2 ic * **£ »•■ I'll never see a coun £-y*s credit. Thoua-h thole whTSv* tW. for cash: The limit is the sky." «w ys M r. Nash. BUt faSeW" COmM to *«*«"* with the nStott ? of tem>r to » lc k out I "Lot's stick toaound flnanco." aays Mr. Nash. — I