THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXIX, Issue 98, 28 April 1938, Page 6

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MEN ABOUT TOWN.) Poppy Day generally brings out philanthropy in the worst of us, and latest evidence of this "give till it hurt*" spirit comes from the Blockhouse Bay disTILL IT HURTS, trict. The l>cat of the lady collector was oppo- j site the local school. During the day a small h boy came out of the gates and was headed i. in the direction of the village store when a Poppy Day poster caught his eye. It appeared i to puzzle him for a time, but finally he i plunged hand into pocket. From the usual i small-hoy conglomeration of buttons, string, i etc.. he carefully drew two halfpennies, dropped i them into the box, and headed back to school ; muttering, "Oli, well. Xo ice block to-day."— i Art. : Effie's lon™ suit was hunting for bargains. She was well-known at every bargain sale for miles round, and her car was frequently , packed with her spoils. A BARGAIN. Returning one evening ' with a wonderful load, she found Jack waiting for her in the lounge. His serious expression made Eflie think that he had called to ask a certain question, which was at the time long overdue. But when he started talking it was not in the manner she was expecting. "Darling," said Jack, "I've ; had such shocking bad luck that it was up to nie to come and tell you quickly. I find that nearly all my money is lost. I had about thirteen hundred a year, but now have only four hundred." He looked at her dejectedly. But Eflie replied with a lovely smile: "Oh, Jack, a model husband like yon. reduced from thirteen hundred to four hundred pounds. What a bargain! Of course I'll have you, you darling old pet!"—A.A.P. The Takapuna Borough Council can and does usually provide interesting and diverting newspaper material, but the Auckland Hospital Board "runs it to a neck," BEDTIME STORY, as they say in racing parlance. The latest hospital breeze concerns laundry work, and we are informed that some of the male patients, owing to a pyjama famine, have been wearing ladies' nightdresses. Naturally something will have to be done about it before the matter goes too far and things become really topsyturvy. The subject of further pyjamas Is plainly usurpinpr the news. In spite of recalcitrant farmers. And facial failing: in ewes. Tet though it has puzzled the mighty, With hurrv and bustle and squash. The answer, the same as the "nightie," Is sure to come out in the wash. For Barnacle William the Sailor. Beribhonod in blue in his ward. Has "scanties" prepared by his tailor. So chanteys can go by the Board. —B.C.H. ! Ever stop to consider the multitudinous signs and notices which condition our freedom of movement? I have of late made a collection of these strictures, inviPLEASE NOTE, tations and threats which confront us at every turn; or at least of the unusual and provocative. Take this, for instance, a notice which confronts the traveller to the cheerful little town of Paeroa: "-Saleyards: Beware of Children." Does Lincoln sleep securely? Or this on the boundary of a Taranaki" butter borough: "Caution, Eltham." We might have said something along those lines and been rebuked, but Eltham has apparently heeded the injunction to "Know .thyself." In Xew Zealand's Other Island we encountered this: "Domett, Populous Area." Scanning Domett we discovered almost a dozen houses within a mile radius. Of course, all things happen in Canterbury. But it is when one comes to the trade notices that one strikes virgin soil. What could be more appropriate than one in Christchurch, "Garden of Eden for Fruit"? That should tempt one—to buy. In a certain restaurant not very far from Queen Street there is a notice which greets the intending diner accusingly: "There is water on the table to drink. Don't drink the milk." Challenge, to the honesty of Aucklanders. but compliment to the propaganda of the Milk Council. "Touchstone" writes: An unfinished note yesterday on the word "weepish" was intended in the beginning to illustrate the greatest of I all phenomena in English, LINGUISTIC its freedom from p'edanLIBERTY. try. There is no such word as "weepish." anv more than there is a word "cloekish," yet everybody understands the meaning of these two coined words. The great authority on English, Dr. Otto Jespersen. gives instances of this freedom from pedantry when he points to a passive construction "such as "He was i . taken no notice of," and to adverbs as prepo-i- j • tional complexes used attributively, as in "his' then residence." "smoking his before break- \ . fast pij>e." "in his threadbare out-at-clbnw shooting jacket": or to whole sentences like "A little man with a puffy Sav-nothing-to-me-or-ril-contradkt-you sort of countenance" (Dickens). Such things are inconceivable in Fiench, where everything is condemned that doe* not conform to a definite set of rules laid down by grammarians. "The Fiench language." says Jespersen. "is like the stiff trench garden of Louis XIV.. while the English |is like an English park, which is laid^out seemingly without any definite plan, and in which you are allowed to walk everywhere according to your own fancy without "having to fear a stern keeper enforcing rigorous regulations. The English language would not have been what it is if the English had not been for centuries great respecters of the liberties of each individual, and if evervbodv jhad not been free to strike out new paths for himself." When a neddy called Superior Guard at the Avondale races yesterday won two races in succession, or rather won the Dominion Handicap and then DID IT TWICE, stepped out in the next race, the Waitakcre Handicap, and dead-heated for first place '•cegoers began to throw their memories into reverse, and quit<; a number remembered the I'auranga meeting about two years ago. when Little Ruse won two successive races. However, veterans who have followed the see-aces in Auckland over a long period will remember the performances cf Annoyed. Annoyed was a pony, and in the days when pouv rales were ja feature of all the racing and trotting programmes in Auckland there were some wonderjful Lilipntians. These little racehorses, four.teen hands two inches and under, could gallop ! to some purpose, and among the best we saw jwere Jack Delaval, Sonica,. Avalanche. Orange I and Blue. Nora, B'.ue Paul. Bulawavo. Fashionlable, Manapouri, Sonoma and Kilderkin. But Annoyed was one of the very best, and she ; established what is probably a world'* record. lAt a meeting at Takapuna the daughter of I Regal and Torment, carrying the colours of her Onehunga owner. Mr. Bray, won the Pony ! Handicap, and then stepped out in the Taka!puna Handicap which followed. This was. the jbig race of the day, ai::l Annoyed won in good [style. It was regarded as a" wonderful performance, but to show that it was no trouble jto her. Annoyed did it again later at the Waikato Racing Club's meeting, when she {again won a pony race and an open handicaj ;in succession.—Johnny.