THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXVIII, Issue 120, 22 May 1937, Page 8

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MEN ABOUT TOWH.)

A brewer's lorry driver in Kent has made a name for himself in medical history. Not only is hie heart on the wrong side, but

everv other organ of his DISORGANISED, bodv is reversed. He has

been aptly nicknamed "the upside-down man." lie perfectly healthy and plays Soccer. Although the cable news does not mention the fact, one can safely assume that at thi« particular frame he can confidently play in any position in the field except "inside right."' Harley Street doctors have X-rayed him and wish to do so again. The doctors might, by having a third and fourth examination, add three other X"s as a delicate tribute to the chap's vocation.— B.C.H.

I "Touchstone" writers: There is no end to tlie fascinatin.z study of how lanjruajie is enriched. A correspondent. "Seamark."' who asks for a note on this LOAN-WORDS, subject, will find what he needs in Otto Jespersen's "Growth and Structure of the English Language.*' Writing of the entry into English of 60 many Scandinavian loan-words—homely expressions for things and actions of everyday importance—he says: "Just as it is iin possible to speak or write in English about higher intellectual or emotional subjects, or about fashionable mundane matter*, without drawing largely upon the French (and Latin) elements, in the same manner Scandinavian words will crop up together with the AngloSaxon words in any conversation on the thousand nothings of daily life, or on the five or six things of paramount importance to high and low alike. An Englishman cannot •'thrive' or be 'ill' or 'die , without Scandinavian words. They are to the language what 'bread' and "'eggs' are to the daily fare."

Tne news that the Minister of Finance, the Hon. W. Xash. is the crack billiards player of the Labour party i« not surprising, as any T»iaii able to iug«le with A HUNDRED UP. cold cash—or is it mainly '"book entries" ? — should have little difficulty in knocking up a decentsized break with the ivories and cue. In recent years billiards has lost much of its one-time popularity and fully 00 per cent of patrons of billiards saloons nowadays prefer to play snooker, or have a flutter at "muff." diamond or devil's pool, or "Caeey." There is a good story told touching a visit many years ago John Roberts paid to uCew Zealand. The then world's champion eueiet had occasion to drop into the Ponsonby Club Hotel to meet an old friend. There were no inquiry offices, porters or hall boys in hotel* those daye. so the one and only J.R, looked for his friend in the most likely places—the bar and billiards room. The latter was deserted except for one young fellow who was indulging in a little cheap practice. Seeing a possible victim, the young fellow, who, by 10 per cent execution and 90 per cent luck "could string together a break of perhaps a dozen, challenged the visitor to a hundred up. "J.R." declined, but the young man was persistent, and finallv offered to concede the visitor 60 start. Smilingly. John Roberts remarked it was apparent he was unknown to the young man. and added. "I happen to be John Roberts." "Oh. in that ease I'll only give you 40 start!" was the reply.—Johnny."

Reference in the "Star" the other day to the presence in Auckland of Australian fiveshilling pieces ie a reminder that we have. in this 'coin, an example COINS. on which precedent frowns. Big coins, by reason of thefr weight, have never been very popular, and the reign of the more ponderous of them has always been brief. Five-shilling pieces were common in the old days, but apparently the novel experience of finding the pocket too heavy accounted for their disappearance. One of the least popular coins ever minted in England was the twopenny piece. ; This, produced in 1797, weighed nearly an ounce and a half. If that were currency to-day you would need a wheelbarrow to take your salary home. Its reign, of course, was short. Much the same fate befell the double florin, minted in ISB7. The florin and halfcrown have always been popular because of their handy size relative to their purchasing power. Of course the mistakes have not always been on the side of a size that has been too great. The reverse, too. has occurred. It is a long, long time since farthing* have been seen in thici country, but a* recentlv a* 1542 the Mint i><uiHl half-farthings, tiny coins that were a nuisance as much for Ibeir diminutive size a- for their microscopic purchasing power. 'I'lic threepenny silver piece has remained popular because of it< great eonveinenee and it* bijrlr intrinsic value relative to its *ize. There ;tc lot* and lot* of things you can purchase with a '•thrum.*' There used to be smaller silver coins—the penny-half-penny piece and the twopenny piece—but they have gone the way of the other coins that failed to please the public. It is interesting to recall that the expression "don't care a rap"' has its genesis in coinage. The rap was produced in Ireland early in the eighteenth century. They were counterfeits, of poor metal and workmanship, and were worth about half a farthing. Far back, beyond the days of the farthings and groats, were crocards and suskins and dodkins. the rery names of which have now vanished.—B.O'X.

A Feilding man with a vigilant eye has written to the Wellincton papers cheerfully pointing out that the King ie wrongly placed in the new issue of OFFSIDE? postage stamps, the Coro-

nation stamp showing the Royal pair. "Whoever saw him on the wrong side in a double photograph ?" he asks". Present writer has just expended onepenee jon the new stamp, and it is even so. Her Majesty is on His Majesty "s right hand instead of the left. Of course, photographs of the Kinjr standing, with the Queen seated at his right hand, have appeared: Feildiixr apparently has not seen those pictures. Xo doubt there the posing was intentional, partly for the sake of artistic effect. The point raised is whether these relative positions are correct on an official stamp. The Depart mental explanation of Postage Revenue i* anxiouslr j awaited, especially by stamp collectors. But rli.it it should have been left to a Feilding resident to be the first to write to the editor alxtiit the misplacing—if misplacing it be is surely a reflection on the alertness of those eminent citizens "Loyal New Zoalander." "Disgusted." "Watchdog" and "What Are We Coming To?" Feilding has its wit* about it. Tt is remembered that when all the world went silly over the relief of Mafeking a Press ! message from Feildinir stated: "Foilding icalm.". Writing of right hand and left, "and designers' drawings. T recall a picture in a certain official souvenir book issued for the visit of the United States Fleet to Auckland in August. 1908. The Government printed a special iseue for presentation, chiefly to the officersof the fleet. The decorative for the recipient's name bore among other symbols of Ariglo-American friendship a U.S.A." naval j bugler with his bugle raised to his lips blowin-r I a call. The bugle was held in his left hand. j It was curious that none of tho*e who had I to do with the picture noticed this until the ; book scribe detected it and hurriedly brought it to the printer's attention. "Too la'te! I'm-.-printed. Let it go. nobody will notice it."' But the Xavy would. Still', the artist miirht have put up a barrage of excuses. He could have declared that all U.S.A. naval buslers were left-handed; that it was the custom of the Xavy to blow left-handedlv : or. in the I alternative, that that particular bugler had been desperately wounded in the right hand i ,in the late gallant war with Spain. What j he did plead was artiefs license; it balanced I I the page picture better that war.—J.C.