JOKES.

Auckland Star, Volume LXVIII, Issue 84, 10 April 1937, Page 2 (Supplement)

JOKES.

(Bent In by Beverley Forder, 12, Onslow Road, Auckland.) Auntie was a very tidy woman, and on the journey home she gave little Willie an orange to keep him quiet. "You were a good boy not to make the train untidy by throwing your orange peel on tl-.e floor," said mother when they got out at the station. "I'm glad you remembered to put the peel in our pocket." "Oh, but I didn't, mummy," replied Willie. "I put it into the pocket of the gentleman sitting next to me." Mr. Simpleton, who had bought a second-hand car, was very astonished one morning to find his garage qjupty and the car gone. In a state of great i excitement he reported the matter to the police, and 10 minutes later he received a telephone message from the station sergeant. "We have found your car all right, air," he said. "Have you arrested the thief who Stoje it?" ftsked Mr. Simpleton. "Yes, we have him here," was the reply. "Well, for goodness sake, don't let him escape until I have a word with him," cried, the car owner. "I want to find out how he made the old thing go." As it was holiday time, crowds had turned up to listen to the lecture which was being given in the local hall. Everyone remained perfectly quiet until the lecturer, warmed up to his subject, cried: "My . friends, if you were to turn round and 'lbok yourself squarely in the face, what would you find you needed most V' "A rubber neck, sir," came a voice from the back row.