THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXVIII, Issue 69, 23 March 1937, Page 6

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MEN ABOHT TOWN.)

"Touchstone" writer: Can you tell me the difference, if there is a difference, between egoist and egotist? So writes a correspondent

who confesses that he has EGOISM AND been unable to find many EGOTISTS, persons who venture to separate the terms. There is a decided difference. Egoism, in ethics, places man's chief good and the supreme end of human conduct in'self, or in the completeness or happiness of self. Egotism is the habit, or practice of "thinking- or talking* much of oneself, or the spirit that leads to this practice. Briefly, egoism gives the "I" undue prominence in thought, and egotism gives the "I" undue prominence in speech. Little Egbert, nearing the three and a half mark, was up to his pranks again the other day, and his father had occasion to read him another of his "WINK'S AS almost daily lessons. GOOD AS —." Assuming his sternest air —one unfortunately which rarely seems to convince his son and heir— the said father told of the awful things that happen to boys who do not behave themselves. He wound up with the question: "Now what are you going to do about it ?" Egbert thought for a moment, and then replied innocently: "I winks my eye at it." Exit father, who once more had been "done in the eye" by his unimpressionable son.—K.T. | Is there any mortal on earth more foolish looking and more foolish feeling than the man who lias stood up to give a lady his seat in a crowded .tram, VACATED SEAT, only to have the courteous offer refused? He goes pink right up to the ears, fumbles, drops his pipe or his newspaper, and says, "Err, err?" Then a sudden speeding up of the car swings him a couple of paces past the seat he has just vacated, and swings another man alongside it. He and the other man exchange glances. ' The other man. hesitates to take it. Its late occupant would very much like to do so, having been on his feet all day, but fears he would look greedy pushing his way back to it. They nod at each other over the lady's head. A litjle contest in courtesy ensues, each urging the other to take the seat. Then, from the front platform, the conductor bawls "Move right along inside, please." The straphahgers surge down the aisle and a third party i who has just- got in flops down in the empty seat, surprised and delighted with his luck. Why haven't women got the sense to take a seat when it is offered to them, without quibbling? Most men would.rather strap-hang for miles than go through the humiliation that some womenfolk inflict in a mistaken idea that they are being fair, or upholding the ! "equal rights for ali" slogan, or some other such silly idea.—lJM.

A lady rider at a Southern agricultural show, falling from her horse, dislocated her neck, but still lives and is not even placed

upon the seriously ill list. BROKEN NECKS. She adds one more to the

growing volume of evidence that a broken neck doesn't necessarily mean the end. There was the case a few years ago of a well-known footballer who got into one of those mixes that occur so often in the national game, and, when the .tangle straightened itself, was left lying on the field. first-aid man found that his neck was undeniably broken. With such implements as he was able to get at the moment he trussed his head firmly to his body, and only when* he was. satisfied that the head would no longer wobble did he permit the man to be moved. Thereafter the doctors laboured long and patiently, and periodic bulletins in the newspapers told of the progress of this modern surgical miracle. To-day the man is fully recovered, but he doesn't play football. There is another case that comes from the distant pioneering days. An accident in the outback resulted in a dislocated neck. There was no St. John Ambulance man, or any of the other amenities that time was -to bring. So the companions of the injured one, putting to the rough atid ready hazard, as pioneers so often used to do. tried , a new form of surgery. They lifted the man up, jammed his head between the spokes of the bullock wagon wheel, and then gave his body a twist in what appeared to be the proper direction. The incredible happened. There was a click, and the dislocated vertebrae popped back into place, and the man whose neck had been broken carried on. in due course, with his pioneering. The difference between the old and the new surgical marvels is that the new ones are performed by the doctors.—B.CX.

In Maori days water seems to have been regarded more or less as one of Nature's free gifts to man, but we pakehas know belter, of

course, than that. Prol»GIFT OF ably the first local body NATURE, ever set up in Aotearoa

decided on a water rate at its inaugural meeting, and civilisation has travelled a lot further than that in the intervening century, the aqua impura that comes through the modern tap being quite an expensive luxury. Even such things as water rates have, however, their compensations. When they provide an opportunity to score off ma-in-law they may even be approved. She is one of those ma-in-laws who are the prop and mainstay of a host of societies and leagues for abolition of this, that and the other, and ; she carries the banner in the forefront of every crusade against Demon Rum. blissfully unaware that no one but bluejackets drinks rum nowadays. Still, she often assails son-in-law for dropping in at the corner pub for a "handle" or his way home, and continually iivsps her daughter to reduce his pocket money °o that he can't. But poor old ma-in-law came seeking sympathy the other day. over a heftv i bMI for water from the local borough council. , "Gee. you must have been on a binge t" srrinned .her callous son-in-law. "You should try flavouring it with malt and hops and you : wouldn't be able to soak away so much—at 1 least not without going into the D.T.'s and "ott-nff prohibited. T couldn't swipe that mnc'i beer in twelve months, if yon paid the bill." If mn-tn-law*s bill is an average one in her suburb, one will need to be charitable in one's ''"'"i'ip"' of the folks there. For instance, if Mrs. Knasrgs. who lives next door to ma-in-low, tells yon that "the Rosynoses down the street have lost their home, you know. Old Rosvnose drank every pennv he earned." it miTht only mean that poor old Rosvnose liked two c«"s of tea at breakfast and sometimes tossed a glass of water when he came in to Sundavl dinner after weeding the ranunculi— i I.M.

SHAFTS. j Germany's latest invention takes the form of a music typewriter which can be used by composers. It is called for short a "Musiknotensehreibmasehine" However. when a crooner tried it out the machine "seized" and eventually burst into flames. * * * Last week a fantail appeared in the Auckland Supreme Court during the hearing • of a ea«e, but had to be forcibly ejected fo*r contempt of Court. The plaintiff in evidence : was explaining how he had boujrht his wife la fur coat, when the bird, perched on a rafter. I interrupted, "Cheap, cheap." —B.C.H.