THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXV, Issue 130, 4 June 1934, Page 6

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MAN ABOUT TOWN.) . Dear M.A.T., —After reading in yon column the exhortation of "Grass Margins to keep streets and roads free from ■ and weeds. I peregrinate* MARGINS. round our city street*and find that there is m reason why the Milk Council should not pu y, cows on some of our main streets. lc Id alono- tlio edges of O'Connell, High, Swansoi and hundreds of other streets wherever on< "ocs is reallv luscious and full of vitamin* ie You see, they are virgin weeds, sheltered bj a- the bin- buildings and thrive without molesta jir tion, unless one may bo occasionally injuret f by a walking stick or by a man walking toe close to a wall. Of course, "Grass Margins c ' mentions this untidiness only in the suburbai a streets: I think lio must never como to towi al or his susceptibilities would be even more hurt. I don't suppose our Mayor ever read* your bright column, but if he does 110 wil ' e probably agree with me that a few weeks s - work for some unemployed would help to give 10 the main business streets the air of tidiness that otherwise always obtains in Auckland. ° A.L.D. It has been claimed that music is agreed a ble to the typist as she works and thai d equality' of finger pressure is learned and [ e maintained under this MUSIC AND method of teaching. Unie TYPESCRIPT, versal use of bands toi d tho support, edification Is and training of typists in large business conie cerns may be feasible, even if costly, and if music is reallv necessary to maintain an even 11 digital pressure, there seeni6 no reason foi d delaying the invention of a musical ty[>ewriter e —comedv tunes for company flotation circulars. 1, excerpts from grand opera for letters of demand, jazz tunes for correspondence with Russian, Slovakian and Japanese merchants, and lovo songs for letters written to London ;t creditors. If a universal even linger pressure y j >s . attained, the "character" discovered in typo,v writing by detective fiction writers will be P gone, and large numbers of yarns based 011 ° the differences of typing will be unwritten. 111 " one of the most famous murder cases in real y American life —the Loeb case, if you remember, in which a couple of millionaire youngsters made away with another boy—the damn- ® ing evidence produced was a typewritten docuinent with characteristic and traceable abere rations of type. Very likely if the person 6 who wrote that letter had written it to the p accompaniment of a band, a radio tune or a ' gramophone record the finger pressure would J: have been so good that the lads would have got away with "the perfect murder." Few people consider the high importance P of the mothball in populating the halls of " memory and in bringing back days of long J ago. Oil any military ocMOTHBALLS, casion when tried and s trusted warriors now in ? the sere and yellow leaf turn out, ancient wear, jangling medals and boots with an B inward glow, show how devoted to the past 1 grandfather Is. There are cloaks still extant ,' that have borne the battle and tho breeze of African early morning, still standing up to ' their job, thanks to mothballs; tunics that I have wandered through Franco and Gallipoli or Mesopotamia, still enclosing brave old ' chests, and pants, benzined, pressed and cared for, that 011 loyal occasions nestle again against 3 older thighs. Spurs rattle, too, that 6eem pristine in their loveliness, that have nestled [ in kitbags or in the bottom drawer not only 5 since the days /of 1914 but since tho days of . 1899—little bits of family history precious , as old Bibles. You will find in many a bureau f quaint old ,bits of man millinery predating any soldier now living —and worn almost to , the last thread by old gentlemen who can no . longer turn out 011 mothball occasions. Modest [ men whom one has known for many years as ; mere civilians armed with a pen surprise one ; by appearing in shining buttons and swords L of a past that is so hard to kill. The universal - mothball lias made it possible not only to keep • a dress coat of 18S3 unholy, it also serves to . keep alive the ancient if faded panoply of war. . God save tho King! Those comparatively few lucky souls who turn tho wheels of commerce, newspapers and buses 011 the King's Birthday (01- the next day thereafter ensuing) THE have many advantages SOLITARY JAY. unknown on ordinary universal work days. One ' sees a perfectly fresh lot of people—many faces for the first time —most of them haggard with anxiety to get somewhere different to do something unusuaL One finds oneself jay-walking across Queen Street with a single tram in sight, and that full of cadets in khaki. This morning one might have done handsprings in Queen Street, tip-toed among the tulips near any safety zone, chatted cosily with a family party in the dead centre of the traffic way, or climbed telegraph poles in search of blossoms without an audience. The exceedingly rare appearances of faces one knows led to mutual confidences such as "Nice day?" "King's weather?" and the answering "Yes! Hope it will last," and those other cheery amenities that induce complimentary visitors to remark that we laugh from morn till eve and smile in our sleep. The man who works on the King's Birthday lias the advantage over his picnicking or parade attending fellow citizen of retiring to a place safe from any kind of weather. He doesn't care whether it snows, turns the heater 011, at.d indulges in synthetic summer, while his everyday neighbour is wearing out his shoes tramping after territorials or impairing his lungs with loiul shouts. But best of all, the King's Birthday worker can jay-walk in Queen Street just as if it wao ISSG and no life insurance. Most people have their own bread board (with knife to match), so very likely when a Bread Board is established it will have to be called a Bread Council or BOARD AND a Bread Committee. AnyBREAD. how, what -seems to be necessary is to control the price of bread so that philanthropists of the bakehouse falter not in their selfless service to the public, and the public as in duty bound pay more and cat more in order that injustice lie not done. The inevitability of bread control suggests the inevitability of more Boards, necessary to the control of the people and the prices they shall pay. Up to now there is no Beer Board or Cheese Board, Bacon Board, Porridge, Fried Egg or Coffee Board, but by judicious approaches to established (if ephemeral) authority several hundred more experts can lie regimented, and if necessary receive travelling allowances from the Railways Board, with State emoluments collected from a public only too happy to pay. Ultimately there would seem to be 110 reason why every man in business shall not have his income augmented by membership of a board. If, for instance, citizen boards controlled all edibles, drinkables, wearables and exportables, the functions of all hard-worked Governments could cease and members of Parliament as ' keepers of the people's purse would disappear —would, indeed, insist as willing slaves of a beloved pubiic in disappearing.

THOUGHTS FOR TO-DAY.

Whosoever enjoys not this life, I count j him but an apparition, though he wear a]>out I. him the sensible affections of flesh.—Sir* Thomas Browne. J A sigh too much, or a kiss too long, 4: And there comes a mist and a weeping rain, s And life Ls never the same again.; —George Mac Donald. c