THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXIV, Issue 30, 6 February 1933, Page 6

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MAN ABOUT TOWN.)

Dear M.A.T.,—The controversy over the origin of Maori place names reminds me of a 6tor7 I W MAORI PUNSTER. 'King "* £ tain Maori place names, and Macn was doing his 'best to oblige. And, nnkeha "what is the meaning of -fatea I iff" said the Maori, "that's an easy one," and' forthwith illustrated his explanation _ y *r7l sketch drawn on the seat of the carriage in which they were travelling. was named after an old ifaonvillagebmlt on the .banks of a stream which divided the town in two in- this fashion. tb_ town was built 'ere and part ere (Patea). Hori. Dear M.A.T.,—The death of Lord Methuen recalls a most amazing coincidence. When the celebrated general was Commander-m- ---° Chief and Governor _ of PIET FALLS IN. Malta he held a. review. Among the soldiers i n Malta at that time there happened to be a South African —who had volunteered for t Great War. As the famous general Passed down one of the lines of men he a soldier whose uniform did not Beemto'fit hi . In addition, the man's puttees were bound round his lower legs in a slip-shod fashion. Lord Methuen stopped. You are apparently a recruit," he said sharply. Oh, no? said the man. "This is the second war I have been in." Methuen closely scrutinised the carelessly-dressed mans features, and exclaimed, "Your features seem familiar l lam sure I've seen you before. Yes, said t] lr . African. "I was the Boer offi-cer who took you prisoner in South Africa!" Its good enough to be untrue almost—H.M. Dear M.A.T.,—The suggestion that the Dominion Road area should be known as the suburb of Bleddsloe, as a tribute to a GovernorGeneral who has shown PLACE NAMES, unfailing interest in the Dominion, its life ana affairs, should appeal to the borough councillors of Mount Eden and Mount Albert, who have authority over this particular part of Auckland. The proposal reminds one very definitely of the recent time when a woman, with fond memories of her birthplace of Sandringham, in England, managed to arouse such enthusiasm in local minds that Edendale suddenly became Sandringham, New Zealand, and remains so to this day. Renaming Dominion Road, a most inadequate and ugly name, wouldbe a different matter, for Lord Bledisloe, especially through his purchase of Waitangi for the nation, merits this tribute. And, talking about celebrities, one can look around New Zealand and come across Ward, Seddon, Mas&ey Domett, Coatesville and Ballance, although (through an oversight) Mr. Forbes is not yet honoured by a Forbes City or an Exchangeville. May Dominion Road residents say witn pride in the future that they are catching a tram to Bledisloe. —G. The New Plymouth police recently broke up some firearms that for various reasons had been wrested from the owners. One wonders if they smashed up a sixTHE OLD chambered old bulldog re-SIX-SHOOTER. volver for so many years the prized possession of the local police themselves. Once in the dear, dead days beyond recall a blood filly jumped at a gate in Carrington Road, staking herself badly. Thus hurt, she galloped into Currio Street, where there was- a large tin shed, its roof descending to within a short distance of the pavement. The mare leaped on the roof, mortally hurt. It was a most extraordinary position, and it was necessary to put the poor beast out of her misery at once. The police were telephoned to and asked to bring a firearm. The authorities thus approached, although, of course, they hastened to the spot, explained that the police revolver had not been fired out of for sixteen years. It was not fired even on this occasion, a horse bus proprietor scrambling on the roof and doing the merciful and very necessary deed. If it proved anything, it was that the firearm, so necessary a matter in the United States, is rarely needed to quell the turbulence of the New Zealand public. No doubt that old bulldog is hanging on the old nail—for it is licensed. Supposing Imperial Germany does return, Wilhelm goes back and royal luxury resumes its sway. The other day a modest-looking German was seen plodding DEAR, DEAD up the steps of a night DAYS, club in London—it would only cost him a pound or so for the whole evening. It was Hans Heinrich, Prince of Pless and Furstentein. He used to have a castle in Silesia, and ha did keep it up and no. error. All his plate was solid gold for a start. He had a private bodyguard—every one six foot six high and dressed in proportion. He had indoor gardens bigger than Kew and hence the largest thing of its kind in the world, and the guests drove round inside among the flowers in carriages. An old-timer mentions that at dinner the footmen changed into even more gorgeous liveries, and that the electric gramophone was guarded by a man in full dress uniform who received orders from guests about the next tune. Germany was for so many hundreds of years without bathrooms that Prince Hcinrich thought he'd do it well. He built a bathroom of pure gold with innumerable golden taps all shaped like angels. Angel number one would give you cool water, number two a shade warmer, and so on until the exquisite angel in the far corner would beat Te Aroha for hotness. It seems a shame that a poor old chap of seventy used to golden angels should have to trapse up a London stair to go to a thirty-shilling night club. Dame Sybil Thorndike has followed the excellent custom of praising the speech and accent of born New Zealanders—and every New Zealander will corNE VARIETUR, dially agree with the dictum of a lady who is a •high authority. The reason, of course, is our isolation and fewness. There are no frontiers over which the foreigner may step to pollute the stream —Dame Thorndike notes that Scots dialects are spoken in the South with rare variations from those spoken in Scotland. It is a fact that born Scots in the Dominion refuse to abandon their dialects and that many—although not <fll New Zealand-born Scots cling to the same, and are proud of it, ye ken. The second generation lad from the English shires only rarely shows a trace of county dialect, but in innumerable cases he can readily imitate the speech of his father and rejoices in caricaturing the same. There is an Auckland lad born on the spot who frequently bursts into the purest "Lanky," much to the joy of those speaking the purest Ponsonby. In Taranaki you may find here and there born Fernleaves still clinging to the dialects of Home, possibly because father and mother lived in the backblocks while the kiddies grew up. Some of these days when the country is thickly enough populated to minimise the nomadic conduct of the people, variations of tongue will creep in to give variety and charm to the standard accent. One wonders how "Captain Erassbound's Conversion" would sound if the whole was done according to one standard of accent, spelling and pronunciation.