THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LXI, Issue 171, 22 July 1930, Page 6

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MAN ABOUT TOWN.) GOOD-NIGHT. It's a useful expression, "good-night." It's a phrase that's both terse and polite. With the customary beam, It's a mark of esteem, > And an aid to precipitous flight. Though simple and common and trite. It's been uttered with venom and bite, And it's easy to floor The thickest-skinned boor With a "Pardon, it's latish, good-night. It's finality dithers the blight . Who buttonholes folk, wrong or right, And lets out a flow Of the stories we know, With an ardour we never can spite. But, viewed in more serious light. It's a phrase that is homely and bright, So instead of "good-day," With the radio I say, "Good-night, everybody, good-night. —A.H. Wouldn't the newspapers be simply wonderful if the everyday woman broke into confidential chats about herself and her latest husband, all the same as HER WORK. those alluring litterateurs, the movie actresses. Can't you imagine Mrs. Blank, of an Auckland suburb (either per herself of per her Press agent), bursting into print thus? "I loved my work, but when I met my husband my whole outlook on life changed. Isn't it funny how a smile, a tear, a handclasp, a kiss, or any little gesture like that can change one's whole life? I feel that married women who continue with a career never have time for things that really make life worth living." This soulful insight into the inner thoughts of a movie actress was read to a workaday Auckland woman. "There's one thing she's left out that would make my life worth living," said she; "a fat banking account." There is no doubt that a lately-played football match has been discussed with a complacency that is entirely excusable. It has filled the mouths of the THE ARGUMENT, thousands and filled the corridors of the hotels. Every billiard table has been hired as a roost during the next ensuing football match. A typical group sitting in a conveyance discussed the Auckland-British match. It was obvious that of the five four were native born. The fifth, who had without doubt been born outside New Zealand, took no part in the discussion. The four, of course, had 110 argument. They agreed on the superiority of the winning side. One turned to the outsider and said; "What do you think about it, Jim?" And Jim replied, 'Well, we can't all be born in New Zealand. Very few are." Land settlement, as every Rotarian and other selfless citizen will agree, is the paramount question of the day. (Loud cheers.) The Brethren at their SERVICE. Monday meal discussed it in a dilettante way, and as the hour grew late it was. said that the profound importance of the matter necessitated a lengthier discussion sine die. It was so important that the brethren might set aside a night so that the community might have the benefit of expert opinion. But a night could not be spared, although a lunch hour might. Some little sacrifice for the common good. (Renewed cheers.) Selected brethren were willing to take up a good deal of time at next lunch expounding the difficult question. Other brethren would be willing to forego any remarks that they might have wished to make so that all the available spare time could be used on the subject in hand. The whole question was how to cram in all the bright thoughts on Land Settlement in the available time. Lunch begins at a quarter to one and is over at one-fifteen, the adjournment being at two sharp. Believe it or believe it not, a selfless voice came from the back of the meeting room with "Cut out the lunch!" Service! Service! Service! "A.A.G." expresses himself with generous strength upon the subject of flogging in schools and it is necessary to reduce his remarks to a mildness and calmness ROD IN PICKLE, unlikely to offend official flagellators who are never officially flagellated themselves and only flog the children and not their parents, a child always being unarmed. The correspondent mentions that years ago Hawke's Bay settled the matter by flogging a flagellator who had flogged an unarmed infant. He further declares that the law steps in if the citizen takes a weapon of any kind and thrashes a dog, a horse or a cow, a man having been severely dealt with for the latter offence within recent weeks. One finds on inquiry that there are lots and lots of citizens who believe in assaults on children by grown men and women, unless, of course, the children are their own children. After all, "it is a small matter," and the point is that the children are always too small to retaliate. The tcacher has his redress without assault. Children who are, incorrigible need not be retained in his school. Slayers of sixteen-pointer stags and other feeble game will feel pretty small after reading this par. Our German friends intend to capture the fur trade of the ROYAL GAME.. world, and there is to be a terrific fur exposition at Leipzig. And at this exhibition will be shown a stag with sixty-six points shot three hundred years ago by a German prince. This news from the "Deutsche Verkehrsblatter" does not mention whether the prince did it with a gun, with a crossbow, a bow and arrow, or a rock. The exhibition will include roebucks with fourteen points slain by Hohenzollerns, including Wilhelm, who, as you know, was a very good shot, although he has only one arm. A very line picture of Wilhelm shooting selected deer was published during his trying I reign. Wilhelm with six loaders in uniform is perched behind an impregnable wall pierced for rifles. The stately stags were driven past the royal enclosure while Wilhelm blazed—it is understood with ball cartridge. Only one deer was ever known to get past" for the crack snipers of the army were planted about the scrub. It is nastily said that once when Wilhelm missed he summarily dismissed the sharpshooter responsible. Cow masseurs will be interested in a news item from St. Louis (U.S.A.). In its international exhibition it had a unique dairy demonstration. Airmen CLOUD COWS. persuaded Guernsey cows to step aboard and soar with them into the nether blue, where a dairymaid wrestled with Buttercup, poured the resultant fluid into paper bottles, and, attaching them to little parachutes, cast them overboard, whence they fluttered down to the crowd. One fears this is the thin edge of the wedge to deprive earthly butter makers of their living. One conceives the air full of cows in aeroplanes in the early morning, the occupants of the 'planes dropping new milk from such a height that it would be delivered as fine, fresh butter. The new system of butter making recalls a very old system still pursued in the backblocks of Arabia. The housefather rises in the morning, milks the old mare (not cow), places the milk in a leather bottle, ties it 011 liis Arab steed, and goes for a gallon, returning to the family tent with a bagful of butter for breakfast. It is sincerely hoped that these ; creations as to this aerial and Aiabian system of dairying will not cause consternation in the Waikato and that Taranaki will remain calm.