ANDOM SHOTS

Auckland Star, Volume LXI, Issue 33, 8 February 1930, Page 2 (Supplement)

ANDOM SHOTS

The transfer of the work of the act-ing-city engineer of Auckland to the city engineer must have been uncommonly easy.

"Questioned as to his future plans, Mr. Chichester said he supposed he would have to work." Apparently the task of piloting an aeroplane from England to Australia, single-handed, is not work.

Official figures show that the rainfall in January was greater than in any previous January for 46 years. Many people felt sure of this, without the official figures, before the month was half over.

The colour of a cow was discussed in the Supreme Court this week. Various witnesses described it as red', briridle, yellow, red and white and "dirty yellow and white." This no doubt was an exceptional cow. Most cows are sanguinary in colour; at least, they are so described.

Fifteen men" were fined £10 each in Hamilton the other day, for betting with a bookmaker. I wonder by how. much the State's revenue would be increased if all those \tfho have bet with bookmakers were fined £10. Perhaps the difficulties of the Finance Minister would begin to look small.

The Naval Conference now seems lees concerned with "categoric tonnages" and "global tonnages" than with "elastic tonnages." What an opportunity exists for one of the delegates to make himself renowned throughout'the world. All he has to do is to tell the world what the conference is doing—in plain language.

The steady decline of the Dominion's birth rate "has brought the natural increase ratio to less than half that existing in the 'seventies." Statements such as this by the Government Statistician are informative, and no doubt correct, but what does he expect the Dominion to do about it?

No personage less than the Prime Minister should be asked to open the new Whau Bridge when it is built. It has not been sl.u ted' yet, but its plans have been considered so long and by 60 many people that really it can't be long now. Perhaps, on the day Sydney opens the harbour bridge, Auckland will stage a ceremony of equal importance at the Whan.

"Downfall of Dictator." This heading, which refers to General Primo de Rivera, is scarcely accurate. It appears that the general did not wait to fall; he jumped. Previously he had asked the qhiefa of the Army and the Navy "if they were satisfied with his regime." I fear that de Rivera would not gain high marks in a dictator's class. Can anyone imagine Mussolini asking such a question? Of course he might, but if he did he would supply the answer as well as the question.

"We do not want to encourage the chewing of gum," remarked the chairman of the Auckland Harbour Board, when* an application for permission to instal automatic chewing-gum vending machines on the ferry and adjacent wharves came before the board. Permission was refused. People who imagined that the Harbour Board merely lopked after the harbour must now stand corrected. Even the minor habits of the people do not escape the board's notice.

"Remarkable scenes were -witnessed at the Central railway station (Sydney) following the arrival of a party of volunteer miners from Rothbury. Pickets attempted to molest the men, one of whom was brutally assaulted. Ho was sent to hospital with severe scalp wounds." Aji uninformed foreigner might have wondered what caused this affray, but any Australian could have told him Wiat it represented some people's idea of "how to solve the coal problem."

The effect of the Cricket Association's offer of free admission to the M.C.C. match on Monday and Tuesday if there is a record "gate" this afternoon must interest every student of human nature. Undoubtedly there will be big attendances on Monday and Tuesday, if admission is free, but are the people—especially those who dislike paying for anything— long-eighted enough to realise that unless they attended to-day, and paid, they would have to pay next week? I fear that some of them will have left the paying to bo done by others.

The latest fashion news from London is that a revolution is taking place. "The rigid straight line has. definitely gone, with, the complete revival of the ornamental side-flowers, laces and ribbons. Even the fans of our grandmothers are reappearing." There is some fun in prospect, for the men. The sight of some thousands of women, with "flowers, lace® and ribbons," scurrying down Queen Street to catch trams and ferries about five o'clock will be worth waiting for. Then, of course, there are the young women who ride pillion on motor cycles. We may sec them, nafc clutching the young man in front, but waving their fans in the breeze., OUR CAR. There were 22',005 motor cars imported last year in nine months. (News item.) Here are same samples of the 22,000: — The new car, the true car, The, nothing-could-be-nicer ear. The blue car, the due cat, The pass-you-ln-a-tricer car. The clean car, the queen car, The how-we-all-just-love-lt-eof. The mean car; the spleen car, The all-got-out-and-shave-lt car. ' The glow car, the low car, " The, alwa.TS-wants-repaixing car. The show car, the tow car, The never-trae-to-bearing car. The used car, the fused car, •The Jolly-old-time-payment car. Abused car, refused car, The bound to-spoll-your-raiment car. The first car, the nurs'd car, The how-we-love-to-show-it car. The worst car, the curs'd car, The take-an-axe-and-blow-it car. The time car, sublimes car; The run-a-bit-and-hop-it car. The dime car, the crime car, i , The wish-thiit-we-could-drop-lfc* car. The flash car, the trash car,. The lsn't-it-a-beauty car. The crash car; the smash car, Befuse-to-do-her-duty car. The cash car, the splash car, The just-the-latest-crazes car. The rash car, the dash car, The let-her-go-to-blazei car. —ELLA BASTBN.