THE PERILS OF ORATORY.

Auckland Star, Volume LX, Issue 230, 28 September 1929, Page 2 (Supplement)

THE PERILS OF ORATORY.

j Ihe standard of public speaking in New Zealand is deplorably low. Public speech in this Dominion may be rich in Quantity, but it is certainly poor in quality. Until at least oiie of our more talkative bores is (justifiably) shot on the public platform, I fear, however,; that there is not much hope of improvement in this respect." Mr. Justice MacGregor, speakinc in Wellington. How to speak in public. Gee! Wish I had the recipe Of the art of public speech, Ain't there someone who can teach. Diction, grammar, commonsense Synchronised With eloquence, So that we can challenge Fate In the forum of debate? Think it's easy? It's a bet You will take the platform yet And you'll find with shaking knees As you ape Demosthenes That it isn't strength of lung Nor dexterity of tongue That will help to make a score As a budding orator. As you stand up on your feet And endeavour to-repeat Phrases , that you thought were wise, You will wobble with surprise As you mouth some stuttered word. Gosh! There's nothing more absurd Than a bungler on the job Talking to the gathered inob. Criticisms? Yes, that's right, Some of them not too polite. Everyone who's heard you speak Looks upon you as a freak. When they say, "Pooh! Platitude!" vVith their harsh ingratitude They supply the acid test On what you "got off your chest," Still, a man must have his say . On the topics.of the day— Taxes, rabbits, noxious weeds, "What this bally country needs " Tramcara and the motor bus "'Tilings the boas should do for us' r — Otherwise there'd be no cause For dissension or applause. Just one word—Discretion para When the crowd discuss bouquets: iou'll be best behind the scenes When they're hurling cats and greensNothing beats a pair of legs ' If you get a hint of eggs; And the tip is "Beat it!" "Scoot!" If some blighter starts to shoot. — E. A.