THE CROC SPEAKS.

Auckland Star, Volume LX, Issue 182, 3 August 1929, Page 2 (Supplement)

THE CROC SPEAKS.

ABOUT HIMSELF: BY HIMSELF,

' It was all because of my suggestion. The whole party —the Budget's third birthday party, which Peter and Wendy are still talking about—wouldn't have been if it hadn't been for me. And to think that I didn't get a scrap of praise for the part I played. Nevertheless, it's the way of the world.—the hard, hard world, as tlie aviator said when hi£ parachute failed to open. As I said before, it was all my idea, and just because Tink and Michael happened to pirate my brains they got all the fuss made over them. The whole thing started in the office 0113 day about three weeks before the date of the Budget's birthday. An electrician friend of mine had given me an old spark coil which, whilst being of no use to him, was sufficiently good to give people electric shocks. It had been my idea to attach the coil to a tin of water and to tack a shilling to the bottom of the tin, then take a stall in the Winter Show and allow people to try and get the shilling out, after they had paid the threepenny entrance fee. I think that, it would have been quite 1 a money-making affair, don't you? However, I'm a journalist and not a common showman, so I utilised the induction coil to amuse myself about the office. _ I tried very hard to give the office ' cat an electric shock, but the felin® was too quick and betook itself to the roof, out of harm's way. I am really of a kind disposition (like the farmer's cow), so I did not pursure the cat on to the roof, especially when I remembei-ed that the railing had carried away and I might fall overboard. So I decided to play a trick on Peter. Carefully I wound a wire round the metal door handle of his sanctum, then I attached it to one terminal of my coil, and having set .the apparatus in motion I' sat in Peter's favourite chair to await events. Presently footsteps sounded/outside. There was silence for a moment, then a yell,rent the air. I roared with laughter and stepped to the door-, meaning to open it and see the fun. I laid a hand upon the handle, then—ouch! Pins arid needles shot up my arm. I thought that I had been attacked by a swarm of mosquitoes. "Yahoo!" I yelled, then, hastily disconnecting the wire, I opened the door •to see»Michael shaking his right hand as if he were a schoolboy 'who had just been caned. Tinkerbell gazed inquiringly at me and her eyes twinkled a little as she looked at the discomfited Michael. Needless, to say I concealed the fact that I had been electrocuted — and that says lots for my power of self-control. "I wanted to surprise Peter," I explained. "Surprise Peter," echoed Tink, and made hurried .plans about the party. Michael and I were to assist her in drafting out invitations, and everyone would be sworn to secrecy.

The great day at last arrived. Tlnk and all of us were in a state of suppressed excitement. The minutes ticked by and as the tiny hands of the office clock approached quarter to six we could scarcely conceal our feelings. Then a calamity happened. Peter whs called to the type room: —and we ha' arranged for a friendly .editor to " capture him. and take him away. As it was he might barge in at any moment and spoil our plans. The editor received his cue and smiling knowingly set off. The minutes ticked by, and as the hands approached ten minutes to six we began to get terribly worried, for we expected the friendly editor to take Peter to his room and there keep him out of the way. Unfortunately we lost track not only of Peter Pan, but of the editor, too! In despair we appealed to a lady editor, who paraded the corridor outside our rpom arid promised to waylay Peter if he showed up. ' . Wendy appeared, and Tink,,- Michael and I set to work to arrange the sanctum to suit ourselves. All the litter 011 Peter's desk was cleared up and.'the inches of dust underneath was removed with the aid of picks, shovels, and feather dusters. Tink literally flew round, and before long Peter s desk was laid out for the party. One by one the guests arrived, ever so cautiously in case Peter should be near. Then, when all had arrived except Peter and the editor friend, we settled ourselves to wait. Presently footsteps sounded in, the outer office and a hand fell upon the doorknob. Slowly, it turned, then the door swung open and Peter was greeted by the party of friends who had congregated to celebrate the Budget's third birthday. The party wa3 a great success, as Peter Pan and Wendy have already told you, and it is all due to the combined efforts of 'Tinkerbell, Michael and —the Croc.