THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LX, Issue 47, 25 February 1929, Page 6

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MAN ABOUT TOV/N.) i . FARMING. I Fannin--! Well. I >!mn!il ?av sRoftenest jranie I kn--w. Look irt the rate- ,-inil taxes '. I \Vl">fvi-r irivcs us a show': I Th- price of lan>l is nutni:' .-. There's no one roulti make ir pa;. j Anil once you'v.- p-;t up your deposit I You're tie.l to the place till you're jrrcv. | You're iin<i>T a rnnrtsnjre | That v.o:ilfl turn an nnirel sour. Ami when you havi- paiii vmir interest It's tii-U at the store fur Hour. It" you <ow any swl in the summer. It's ti'Tl in llllTi''-: a ilrmisllt- - It" 'h.-re isn't the t-inU will j-er it. Anil \ou take it from me you're out. If you're milking th" rows are emptr. • 'onilemneil or ili ~.-iss.-< 1 or dry — I fi'il you a farmer's a If he knows what's the best to try. If you're selling the market's prlutte.l. If you're tiuyin- the prio.-s are You feel as if notiiini: is worth it. And you'd t.ett.-r walk out and die. I lauu-h wiien they talk of working And mention ei-_-ht hour- a dr.v. Why. it's twenty.four hours for fame---And they don't -_-et a Friday's pay. Well, th- house may he a hit shakv 'i he verandah is sa--.'!::-- a hit- -" T,! " I I'ke tl Id phlee. it's >~ homelv. And somi-how I always feel rif. What: S.-ll our for an arre'Xor i',, r ;1 year or two." Fin fond of this u-ate f-r r.--tin~ So surn. -ood d:i\ to you. —Tiiii T.ut. -V i-. i-taiii power board had a seriouComplaint. A lady who wrote in the secretary said thai two of the board's workmen who had I.ecn to her house to I THE DEFENCE. ~;f, .t repa,, - u-.-d exceed- , iiiL'ly I'.iii language. The ; l-'Var.i. ~; ,-,„,, ~.. -..;, l„„ l::( | ;,, take n ,,tiee i" r ■-'"'•'' ;l '''-n plaint, and tin- tu„ workmen were put ~n the mat. T],,-\ both -tout'v : denied tiie use of had !;- : : and the one ; j volunteered an »xpla!i;' f i-m : "Ir was like this."! ! he -aid. "L wa- ,„. -, judder .-.;, ] Alt „,,.- down ' I below. \ nformnat, dv I <: ; , ; j,.,; ~ _~0 l (lt- | boiling lead ~,„! it ~.",,._:,; Ai] ,„, tlt „ ,^ ck ;lt- ; the neck." •'And what did All' -.:> ';" a-kci [the oth.-ial . •< >h ;,,. - a j.) 'Yin really will have to i- no,re careful. Henry:'" "When cn-tabulary dut\'s to he done. t(1 : | I'C done, the policeman's life is riot a haj.j.y | ; one.'' The scrutiny which the London police I ___ „ an <i tiieir Auckland <-onTHE FORCE. temporaries are undergo- , . '«.- w 'i'l cause sympathetic i thoughts or men who are indispensable to us. ! [ i here was an old commissioner once. who. I ja.-W what type of man made the best con-! I stable, rephed that "the man straight off the j <rrass wa- far the best kind because he hadn't - : •to be untaught. And as he was a Scotland! I Wcl man perhaps he knew. Curious that i unlike the great London organisation w e have! j no detectives who have not bee;, constables.' | In short, you can't imagine a crook bein-- run' Ito earth by anyone who i- n 't nearly -ix feet ' I tall and. -ay. fourteen stone. All 'successful ! i I" jllo,> <->ii i-s do n,,- L i.-ou.e oil the ora.-s. For' j in.stan.-e. on- of our smartest inspectors came' out ot an Auckland draper's P ] lo ,, t0 join the ; force. He had formerly ]~,, a eavalrv soldier ' Then th-re j„ the suporiuten-lcnt who'bolom-d ' to the ~.,me,tic staff ~f a former i;,,v,n'„r I It was this eHicient oilher who was walkin-! across a street in a Xew Zealand ritv v.he,, | a motor ,-ar ran him rvntlv down. A- he 1.-. v \ on his \ KI ,k oazin- at the' underworks ~f the 1 I ';•■"■ -i<: '• ;, '"-y -"iiid: "Release vour brakes. vo„ ' ! .""•','. "J- l "' ! ' ! - ,i '":-'- h«« emerged, and e\ en j :in t ... Mom-nt did n,,t 1.,, c hi, dignity jOl Hl— 0.i.1\ ••-. c • j Stories of illicit -rill- ij, ~„r own lianpv I .land .uenerally contain the information that' ! the gentlemen who run them go far from the • I niaddinfj er<>v.-d to rlo it ' | BEVERAGE. There is something dL"'. tully romantic about the . -core.-y or the bu.-h and. the hard-doers who i.'v « '•;;' >!-tarious trade. Still, there have been ! ille'.t -t ; i,s a tew yard.-, from a crowded street • In a southern city there was a nice little sweets , ' -.mp. A dear old iady sat in th, s !l0 p knittin- '•■ <«..-ks and selling lollies. All the little children ■ j knew her because she used to o ive a pwd i pennyworth. F.ut one day the police insfsted I "f. invading th- v,a-l,ho U se a vard or two from' tl..' <:.;:«r old lady's -hop and found a plant! with the re.pu.-ite "worm" distilling awav like! mad. Tne whi.-ky is remembered because it ' "as water white and warranted to kill at 1 ' twenty yard- through a bi- hill. Several -ai- ! lons ot this cheering iltiid lay at the local pWiee i station, and. present scribe was invited to par- i take }lc dipped a. trembltncr tin-er in and iK'weu it. No wonder people sin- n the p! ed „ e , ! Ihe one tnoujrht that has persisted ever since! 'f'.", ,''. are the ras t-iron people who v.-illin-dv I dnnk lil.ctt still whisky, and where do the'v bury them ': ' Some little local lads disported in the' wave, with a large floating ball. A ball rolled ' 1-y wind and tide is faster than a swimminj j iad. and soon jt was far LOST BALL. beyond them. \ . . swimmer shooed the lads ! l.ack to the beach and swam after the ball i Hie ball was fa t , but the man hea-!ed it audi Loth were by this time *i. C oks to tl'e three young men on the beach. 'The man with the I hall waved a hand. It was obvious he wa~ ; rather spent. The younir men on the bo-ich" ! accompanied by the excited populace ! tor a boat. They found one. but it had no oars ' so they raced inshore to a store and obtained ; apair from stock. Accompanied bv mvriads ot anxious citizens, they pushed the" boat into : tne ocean, clambered aboard and pulled: violently for the tw,, bobbin.' sph-'-re-- the ball! and the head. A few ]e !!::t h, out the iieoce on ' shore permitted themselves hi hi ritv.' for the : boat sank and there were now four" heads and a ball bobbing ln the sea. The immediate 1 ot the three young rescuers attracted ' the whole of the attention of onlookers and the man and the ball were merely • considerations. Tn the meantime' the man .{Uietly pushin- the ball ahead, arrived on the '. beach about the time the rescuers arrived The popular prepared to give him first aid and to pump him dry if necessary. "Whv. what's all the Hiss about?" he asked calmly! "Didn't you beckon to us to come out and s ave you-" ' shrieked a dozen voices. "No." replied the ball pusher "I just put my hand up to tell j the kids I had their ball." "Wonder whose! boat that was we sank?" asked on* of the three young men. "We'd better take the ladv's oars back," said another. * " The Rev. Allan Cropp. the Australian-born ' missionary who has spent seven years in the ■ Solomons, was ordained at the Methodist Con- j . „„„„ ferenee on Friday. Mr i ; A MISSIONARY. Cropp is of interest to ': Aucklanders. a s this i- : ns mothers home town, while his father wis; born at Thames. As a vouii" woman his : mother was employed in 'the "Star" orii-e : , Mentioned that Mr. Cropp has irained notoriety ■ trom the sj-.-ed and skill with" which h~ —.'- i • about the Islands in a < M |] launch. 8r0,7-ht - np at Rockdale iLadv Robinson's Bea.T j. Sydney, he learned all 'the tricks of a trickv : i harbour with his father, an intrepid yachts- t man. and incidentally a rare hand with a sport- ! i ing gun. Old hands may remember the davs ', when the Hauraki Plains were the Tiako t swamp. The father of the missionary with ! other youths, spent all his leisure in more or 1 less seaworthy craft cmbino- the -swamp f.e- , duck. _ Very likely th,- missionary knows wlu.-h r end of a gun the shot comes out of, too! t