TACT AND TACTICS.

Auckland Star, Volume LVIII, Issue 226, 24 September 1927, Page 27

TACT AND TACTICS.

The problem of tTie motorist and the traffic "co|»" set for the tactful last week, found hundreds ready to offer a solution. The replies came in in shoals, and by the time the judges had accomplished their task they were knee deep in opened envelopes. They came from everywhere, city, suburbs, and country, and they covered nn immense range of quaint tnd curious reasons and excuses. The judges should never be hard put to find gome valid alibi if checked by the police for a similar default after their experience in sifting the many hundreds of "rescues" offered by the competitors. The first prize of £1 10/ goes to L. Woods, 5, Percival Parade, Ponsonby, for: "Well, you see, constable, it's this way—l'm rather short-sighted. I saw a form with outstretched hand ahead, and thought it was a mere pedestrian trying to fend off inevitable fate."

THE POLICEMAN AND THE MOTORIST. AVERTING THE WRATH OF THE LAW. THE DILEMMA OF THE WIFE.

"Why didn't you stop when I put out my hand?" "Well, you see constable, it's this way— I'm rather short-sighted. I saw a form with outstretched hand ahead, and thought it was a mere pedestrian trying to fend off Inevitable fate."

Second prize of 10/ is awarded to D. Bambury, 67, Epsom Avenue, for: "Well, you see, constable, it's this way—My wife just beckoned to me to come on, and I forgot that your commands override here. You don't know my wife, but I do." Among other smart suggestions were the following: M. Broberg, 15, Millais Street, Grey Lynn.—Well, you see, constable, it's this way: "Your uniform resembles that of the Salvation Army, so my Scotch instinct prompted me to drive on and dodge subscribing to the self-denial fund." Mrs. M. Schofield, 27, Sheehan Street, Ponsonby.—Well, you see, constable, it's this way: "Being a school teacher by profession I'm that used to hands going up, that for a minute I didn't realise it was you." M. H. Bartlett, 14, Princes Street, Devonport, Auckland.—Well, you see, constable, it's this way: "Once I stop my old Lizzie in a busy street, there is always a traffic jam for half an hour." W. P. Grey, Sanders Avenue, Takapuna.—Well, you see, constable, it's this way: "Tm such a friendly sort of chap that when you shoved out your mit I jest natcherly came across to shake."

W. Truelove, 57 Woodside Road, Mount Eden.—Well, you see, constable, it's this way: "What with silk stockings and windy days, I shall really have to give up driving. A TEN GUINEA HAT. This week's competition is one of especial interest to the married—or the about-to-be of both sexes. Hubby is a trifle stubborn, but his better-half is determined to have her own way, "You spent ten guineas on stockings last week, he says reproachfully, and now you want a ten guinea hat." How does she get it? What is the answer which will meet his stern demeanour and induce him to foot -the bill? A prize of £1 10/. is offered for the best solution, with ten shillings for the next best. There is no entry fee, and any "Star" reader may compete. The only condition is that answers must not exceed 25 words. All entries, endorsed "Tact and Tactics," must reach the "Star" office not later than noon on Wednesday. The result will be published in next Saturday's issue of the "Star," which will also contain a new and interesting problem.