FARMING INTELLIGENCE.

Auckland Star, Volume LVII, Issue 18, 22 January 1926, Page 12

FARMING INTELLIGENCE.

BILL'S MATRIMONIAL TROUBLES.

(Communicated by A. G. STEPHENS)

KING COUNTRY, January S.

Besr to report we then "put Bill in the creek, though had a lot of trouble in

getting him there. The ass wanted to

wait the full half-hour his young sister Sarah guessed she would be dodging her ma before she came to help hunt for

Bill. I pointed out that Sarah was simmering when I left her, and would

probably, being a female, boil over with excitement in considerably less than estimated time; to which Bill responded

that, unless the old lady was failing. Sarah wouldn't be able to dodge her at air in the busy time of the morning.

However, between coaxing and bullying, I actually got Bill to looking at a fairly deep lio'le; ami the more he looked at it the less he liked it. until, mc brushing against him by accident, he unexpectedly fell in- Having swiftly retreated to a safe distance, T did not hear all he said, but I think that in time to come Bill's language, if he gets married experience, will be nearly as good aa his old man's

Fortunately, at my safe distance, I was able td spot Sarah scurrying through the tall timber in the dangerous distance. That devoted sister had come to save her • brother's life and have a good time only ten minutes behind mc.

I rushed up- to the dripping and objurgating Bill where he stood on the edge of the creek; and before he knew ho wasn't where he thought he was 1 pushed him in again. '"She milks eleven cows," I hissed at him as he darted forth. "You can't be any wetter. Lie down and play up! Be a man!" With the result that, as arranged, when Sarah come up breathless Bill and I were struggling on the bank. 1 was pulling him out, and Bill was trying about quarter-heartedly to get in again. Seizing a favourable opportunity. I thoughtlessly let go my hold, and Bill went in again without intending. Sarah screamed.

"Stop that!" I yelled at her. "Give mc a hand to hold'him! Bill is desperate !"

The gallant girl rushed half-way up her stockings into the water, and seized one arm of Bill, and yanked away, while I yanked away at a leg. Bill fell over, [Hilling Sarah with him, and they both went in. I reckoned it would do Sarah no harm and give her a lot more to talk about.

That devoted girl never let go her hold of her brother. She hung on, found her feet in the mud, and pushed Bill while I pulled him. Thus we got the hero right out, urged him to a safe distance, and laid him on a grassy patch to drain —being' too wet to dry. "You see?" I said to Sarah. Sarah saw. "What do you think ought to be done to a girl that betrays and deserts a noble young man like that? ,, I asked her. "She was never really engaged to him, was she?"' suggested Sarah. "I think we had better get Bill up to the hut." Bill, as per instructions, said iiever a word, for I had exhorted him that what makes the most impression on the sex that milks eleven cows is silence—terrible silence. Hauling Bill to his silent feet, 1 answered for him. "In Bill's mind she was engaged to him, and as good as married to him, and then she turns round and hooks up with this interloper.' , "She isn't hooked up ret,' , says Sarah, "and perhaps she won't be now she knows how fond Bill is of her."' "But she doesn't know," I protested. "She will when I <roTl her," asserted Sarah, with a nod of her firm little head, that boded no good to the girl who milks eleven cows. "Do you think Bill's safe t,o be left?" —as we reached the door of the hut and Bill staggered inside, still terribly silent. I was just in time to rush past and intercept him as he was going to throw himself down on my bunk. I thought that was carrying the distraught idea a bit too far. I slammed the door on Sarah. "Xo, you don't. Bill,' , says I; "you drip on your own bunk." lie wouldn't do that, so I left him pulling his clothes off and making sheep's eyes at our good towel, and came forth to Sarah. "Bill's safe this spell." T informed her, "and doing as well as can be expected. - ' "I'll see her this very afternoon," promised Sarah, "and T'll try and come over this evening. T shouldn't wonder ."' Sarah broke off abruptly and added,'"lt Bill wants her so much as that he ought to get her. But I don't know what lie can see in her myself." "Love is a mystery," T stated, saffety, "Isn't it!' , agreed Sarah, thoughtfully, with her eyes stretched to their widest. "You look after him, Mr. Johnson, and I'll try and arrange something. Mother will be in an awful state." The good young sister departed hurriedly. (To be concluded to-morrow.)