PERSONAL ANECDOTES.

Auckland Star, Volume XL, Issue 193, 14 August 1909, Page 14

PERSONAL ANECDOTES.

J. M. BARBIE'S PIPES. A recently published interview with the famous novelist and dramatist contains the following paragraph, from which it would seem that Mr. Barrie is more attentive than ever to "My Lady Nicotine." "I spent exactly 65 minutes with the great dramatist. When I entered he was smoking a calabash pipe of generous proportions. He smoked it out in a purposeful way, and laid it on the mantelpiece to cool. Then he felt in his right coat pocket and produced a handsome briar. This he loaded and lit. When it was done he laid it on the shelf and took out a second briar from another pocket. He smoked it out, and then, assuring himself that the calabash was cool again, went back to it. He smoked •three and a-half pipes wJthin the hour, and finished up with a cic-trette. LAST BUT NOT LEAST. An amusing adventure happened on one occasion to Dr. Clifford when he was conducting a series of services in Birmingham, says a writer in "Woman's Life." Arriving only just a w minutes before the commencement, the doctor was refused admission by the policeman at the door. "I want to go in," said Dr. Clifford. "Are you a seat-holder I" asked tho official. "No, I am not. 1 ' "Then you can't go in." - "I think," remarked the famous passive resister, "that there will be room for mc • in the pulpit." "I am not sure of it," retorted the other. "But I am Dr. Clifford; and I am due to preach in another minute and a-half." "Oh, are you?" said the incredulous policeman. "I have let in two Dr. Cliffords already." A SANTLEY STORY. Here is a good story told by Santley against himself in describing a ride to Bechlehem on one occasion. "As my horsemanship was exercised chiefly in my youth on a rocking-horse, it is decidedly feeble. I gave my guide particular instructions to be sure that I should Be provided with a, quiet animal. He was quiet beyond a doubt; no artifice I was capable of, no exertion on my part, could induce him to move at more than a deliberate walk. He had a pair of shaky legs, and when we were clambering over the rocky road by the pools of Solomon I kept a sharp look-out for any place I might tumble on, in case I was suddenly ejected from the saddle. I arrived safe at the high road. 'Now,' I said to my guide, T have had enough of riding; I will do a little walking to stretch my legs.' 'But,' he replied, 'we have seven miles to go.' 'No matter if it's seventy,' said I. T have had enough of wooden horses for the present, and I intend to perform the remainder of our journey on Shanks' galloway.' 'Ah,' he remarked, with a snigger; 'you are not much of a rider.' 'Not on such a horse as that,' I replied haughtily. 'On my own full-bred steed, seated in my own saddle, I am a perfect jockey. " A STORY OF SADOWA. The Archduke Joseph, a distant relative of the Emperor Francis Joseph of Austria, belonged to a branch of the Hnpsburg, which had been settled in Hungary for more than a century. He was the great protector of the local gipsies; hence his name, 'The Gipsy Archduke"; and he had popularised the. Tigane music by arranging many of their tunes in scores for orchestras. During the Prussian-Austrian war of 1866, on the night of the 2-3 July, before the battle of Sadowa, a division commanded by the Archduke, retreating before the Prussian Army, had bivouacked near a town in Bohemia facing north. At midnight the Archduke, when resting in a peasant's cottage, was awakened by the arrival of a gipsy, who insisted on seeing him personally, having come to report the advance of the enemy. The Archduke, who spoke Roman! fluently, asked, "How do you know? Our outposts have not reported any movement." "That, your Highness, is because the enemy is still some way off." "Then how do you know? 1 ' The gipsy, pointing to the dark sky, lighted by the moon, observed, "You see those birds flying over the woods from north to south??" "Yes; what of them?" "Those birds do not fly by night unless disturbed, and the direction of their flight indicates that the enemy is coming thi3 way." The lArchduke put his division under arms, and reinforced the outposts, which in two hours' time were attacked heavily. -—Field-Marshal Sir Evelyn Wood, in the "Saturday Preview." SOME HUSH BULLS. Sir Richard Steele, that famous Irish knight of cleverness and wit, once invited an English nobleman to visit him by saying, "If, sir, you ever come within a mile of my house, I hope you will stop there!" It was this same Sir Richard that, on being asked why his countrymen made so many bulls, replied, "I cannot tell you if it is not the effect of climate. I fancy if an Englishman was born in Ireland, he would make as many."

An Irishman who married at 19 repented of his choice, and swore fWt he would not get married so young a A in if he lived to be as old as Methuselah.

On examining an invoice* of goods, a merchant found everything correct except one hammer, which was missing. "Oh, don't be unaisy, sir," cried the Irish assistant. "Sure, I must have taken it out to open the hogshead!"

"Whiniver anyone's asked mc what eounthry I loike best, I've always tould him Oirland," said a sturdy labourer. "But," he added, "no one's iver asked mc vit."

An Irish carpenter sent in a bill for "hanging two barn doors and himself, seven hours, ten shillings."

A young woman admitted that she liked her lover very much, but said she was the darling of a widowed mother whose kindness could not be equalled. "Marry mo," begged tho enthusiastic lover, "and see if I don't beat your mother!"

I was going over tho bridge the other day," said a son of Erin, "I mot Michael Connolly. 'ConnolTy,' says I, 'how are you?' 'Pretty well, thank you, Keefe,' says he. 'Keefe,' says I, ''that's not my name!' 'Faith,' says he. 'and mine's not Connolly)' With that we looked at aleh other, and suro enough It was nayther of us."

An Irish paper told of a poor deaf man named Gaff, who was killed by being run over ov a locomotive, "And ho received a similar injury this tlmo last year," added the paper. _