PERSECUTING THE AUSTRALIANS.

Auckland Star, Volume XXX, Issue 196, 19 August 1899, Page 1 (Supplement)

PERSECUTING THE AUSTRALIANS.

BORED MOSTLY BY BROTHER

COLONISTS

THE GIDDY INTERVIEWEE

(From Our Special Correspondent.)

LONDON, July 7.

The Australian Eleven are made of less finnieking stuff than Mr Rudyard Kipling-, or the nuisances of notoriety-cum-popularity which they have to go through morning, noon and night would long1 ago have reduced them to desperation. The inevitable inflictions of "interviewei-s," photographers, tradesmen, and so forth they endure with what patience they may, but the Australian tourist arouses copious maledictions. He seems to think that in calling at the hotel and insisting on shaking hands and talking cricket he's conferring a favour. "Thought you'd like to see a face from the good old colony, chummy, so I called round just to have a glass and congratulate you, and say how proud of you we all are. Why, 1 may tell you, too, I'm by the way of being an old friend. I didn't absolutely know your brother's Avife's cousin, but Avhen I was at Borrioboola ten years ago I lived next to a man whom she refused twice. Singular, isn't it, that you and I should meet here in the Old Cotmtry. Very singular,"' and so on for twenty minutes, unless the cricketer is downright rude.

The team steadfastly avoid the wily cricket interviewer, but are occasionally caught aneut general topics. "Answers" has been trying- to land them with the old wheese, "How do you like London?" The writer says: Asked bluntly what he thought of London, Charlie McLeod said that it was a wonderful place, adding reflectively, "But I think it's too big for one city; it wants cutting down a bit. I never can quite understand how anybody ever gets to know his way about. First week I was here I thought I had mastered enough of London to go for a stroll, In ten minutes I was so completely bushed that I was glad to hire a cab and drive back to the hotel. No, this place is far too big." NOBLE PERPETRATES A PUN. Noble, who continually preserves an air of lofty self-possession, would rather get a "pair of spectacles" in a test match than look surprised at anything. He sees what is shown to him with the placid imconcern of a young man who knows it all by heart; but in his rare moments of communicativeness he will tell you that he is delighted with everything he has seen, and that he has serious thoughts of remaining in London to study dentistry. "The English had better look after their stumps then," he says, with a touch of humour of which no chance acquaintance would suspect him. TRUMBLE HAS AN IDEA. Hugh Trumble, who generally succeeds in hiding his impressions as cleverly as he conceals his intention before he delivers the ball, recently said at Nottingham: "Everybody knows that I am fond of this country, bu,t I wish they'd have hansoms with escape doors at the back. There is a fortune waiting for the man who can invent a cab like that. To this expression of opinion Trumble had been prompted by the unpleasant experience of having narrowly escaped being kicked to death by a maddened horse at Trent Bridge. The cab. containing himself, Darling, and Noble had fallen over on a broken spring, and the horse, becoming infuriated, had lashed out with both feet, just grazing Hughie's knees and tearing the skin off the back of his left hand. Failing the suggested back door, the three cricketers were at the mercy of the horse until someone could get near enough to undo the traces, and then the three scared Australians crawled out on to the pavement. LAYER HAPPY WITH A CAMERA. Frank Layer, the tall, amiable Victorian, declares that of all the fine sights he has seen in England the Summer Eights on the Cam impressed him most deeply. A snapshot view of the proceedings has been added to the hundreds which Layer has already taken in this country. He is the most inveterate snapshottist in the team. GIVE JONES LONDON AND— The gentle Ernest Jones, asked for his impressions of London, replied with characteristic bluntness: "It's all right; I can stand it all the time. Seen the sights? My word, I've seen everything I No, I've not seen Westminster Abbey or St. Paul's; but the new American bar at the Alhambra's a daisy. Leno's not so funny as he was, but the girls are just as beautiful as ever. Give me London, and you can have the rest." DARLING GOES SLOWLY. Darling being a hard, practical, level-headed son of Scottish parents, enjoys himself quietly, appreciates the good things in a steady,' methodical way, and improves his leisure by making hard bargains for his oricket outfitting store in Adelaide. With characteristic caution he would decline to give a definite opinion about anything unless he was absolutely certain. "I like this country," lie said drily, "and if the weather keeps good we'll win a lot of matches and have big attendances." Bej^ond these considerations the philosophy <of Joseph Darling does not go. It is curious that while every member of the team vigorously protests against the suggestion that they ever see the newspapers or care a brass button about criticism, they are continually running from one to another with journals containing paragraphs about themselves. They are, in fact, the most sensitive lot of men in regard to newspaper comment that anyone could imagine.