HIS NAME WAS MARY ANN.

Auckland Star, Volume XXIX, Issue 306, 28 December 1898, Page 3

HIS NAME WAS MARY ANN.

At an entertainment given for the benefit of the seamen on board the steamer Kaiser Wilhelm 11. on her voyage from New York to Genoa, Mark Twain was called on for an address. On being introduced, he rose, and, in his peculiar tone of voice and manner, said: — ' .

'My friends, I see that my name is on the programme for an address. As this was done without consulting- me, I shall' give you an anecdote in its place. Now, you know, there are anecdotes and anecdotes, short metre and long metre. I ' shall give you a long metre, one with a snapper at the end. It is about a Scotch-Irish minister who thought he was called to preach the Gospel, while he knew that he had the gift of oratory, and he never missed an opportunity to display it. An opportunity was afforded on the occasion of a christening. There was a considerable audience, made up of the relatives, friends, and neighbours of the parents. The preacher began by saying:— . . , ' "We have met together, my friends, on a very interesting occasion—the christening of this little child—but I see already a look of disappointment on your faces. Is it because this infant is so small? We must bear in mind that this globe upon which we live is made up of small things— infinitesimal objects, we might say. Little drops of water make the mighty ocean; the mountains which rear their hoary heads towards heaven, and are often lost in the clouds, are made up of little grains of sand. Besides, my friends, we must take into'consideration the possibilities in the life of this little spec of humanity. He may become a great preacher, multitudes may be swayed by his eloquence and brought to see and believe m the truths of the Gospel. He may become a distinguished physician, and his fame as a healer of men may reach the .uttermost parts of the earth, and his name go down to posterity as one of the great benefactors of humanity. He may become a great astronomer, and read the heavens as an open book. He may discover new stars which may be coupled with that of Newton and other great discoverers. He may become a distinguished statesman and orator, and by the strength of his intellect and eloquence he may control the destinies of nations, and his name be engraved upon monuments erected to perpetuate his memory by his admiring and grateful countrymen. He may become an author and a poet, and his name may yet appear among those now entombed at Westminster. He may become a great warrior and lead armies to battle and victory; his nrowess and valour may change the map of Europe. Methinks I hear the plaudits of the people at the mention of his deeds and name. He.may be-come-er-er— he might—er —er' —; 'Turning to the mother: 'What- is his name?'' ■ ' , 'The mother: "What is the baby's name?" ' "Yes, what is his name?" , , 'The mother: "Mary Ann, sir."